-
Stern: So how do you know an idea is good enough
-
if you never try it on stage?
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CK: Well, there is a few different ...
-
There's some ideas I just know.
Some ideas you just go
-
'cause you've been repeated
the rhythm so many times
-
being on stage and talking
and getting laughs
-
Stern: Right.
-
CK: I'll have a thought and I'll go
Oh that's ju.. oh that's a bit
-
Stern: 'Cause you know it from
all the years of doing it ?
-
Yeah you just know
-
and then there's other bit things where I go
-
I don't think anyone would ever like this.
-
This actually might be troubling
to some crowds.
-
I wanna try it anyway.
-
Stern: Give me an example, if
you could think of one,
-
where you said to yourself this could be really good
-
but troubling to the crowd and then you got up
-
and it just totally--
-
like the crowd was just disturbed by it.
-
Like, I'm pretty sure my crowd was disturbed
-
by Richard's bestiality brackets.
-
[CK laughing]
-
Stern: Don't you think--
-
What are you thinking about now
-
that can possibly go wrong, or did in the past?
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CK: These days, well, I don't
know about these days, uh,
-
I mean I had one bit that never quite made it
-
'cause I didn't -- and I could've made it work.
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Stern: Because you were having a dark thought?
-
CK: Yeah.
-
Stern: It was dark?
-
CK: Yeah.
-
Stern: What was this dark thought?
-
CK: Well last year, I think I did
this on the show actually,
-
on the series. I think I put it in there.
-
But it was a thing about, uh, you know
-
people hate child molesters so much.
-
They hate them worse than murderers
-
or anybody else.
-
Stern: Right, right.
-
CK: So getting caught child
molesting is just,
-
that's the end.
-
Stern: That's the worse.
-
CK: It's really the end of your life in every way.
-
Stern: That's right.
-
CK: Whatever you had is gone.
-
Right, so uh, that's why a lot of kids
-
that get molested get killed.
-
'Cause whatever got you to the moment
-
where you molested a kid,
-
once you hit that moment,
-
you're like, "I can't let this kid go now,
-
'cause I'm fucked if this kid
-
goes home and tells anybody."
-
So you kill the kid.
-
So the bit was that if we could hate child
-
molesting a little less,
-
we might get some kids back.
-
[laughing]
-
Stern: That is a brilliant thought.
-
CK: If somebody could go,
-
[laughing]
-
say to themselves, "Alright I've
molested--"
-
You know, someone could call you and go,
-
"Hey, I molested your kid.
-
Do you want him back after soccer?
-
Do you want me to drop him off
after his game?
-
Does he have any allergies I
should know about?"
-
Stern: So, we're hurting children by
-
hating child molesters so much.
-
CK: That's right. Well, I wasn't able to
-
come to that conclusion.
-
The way I made the bit work, for me,
-
and made it palpable for some audiences,
-
like 20%, was to say,
-
"I don't -- that what I just said is true,
-
that if we hated child molesters less,
-
less children would die.
-
I don't know what to do
with that information."
-
[laughing]
-
Stern: Like you don't know where to go.
-
CK: I don't know what to do with it.
-
Stern: You came to the right place today.
-
Yeah, this is the place to air those
-
kinds of thoughts. Wow.
-
CK: So that was a bit where I thought--
-
Stern: Maybe the bit was you
-
starting a group. I dont, I don't know.
-
[laughing]
-
CK: When I hit that moment
-
when I had that thought,
-
I thought, "I'm fucked,
-
because I know that's funny
-
and people are gonna get upset."
-
But I had to do it.
-
Stern: But yeah, you have to do that
-
because it's so great.
-
CK: It's a smart, fun thing to say,
-
and I know I'm gonna upset some people
-
but I'm gonna go ahead and do it.
-
Stern: To me, one of the most
-
brilliant hours of stand up
-
was when I heard Chris Rock
-
do that -- I forget what the special was called
-
on HBO but it was all about, you know,
-
race issues and, um, black people who,
-
uh books were like kryptonite --
-
I mean it was the darkest fucking
-
most like honest appraisal of everything.
-
But I mean, I bet you there was a time
-
where he went, "Man, I even don't know
-
if I can do this stuff."
-
CK: Well the thing is,
-
you have to with all comedy,
-
you have to be willing to fail
-
to get something to work.
-
And a lot of bits that I've done
-
have started off bombing,
-
like when I started doing that bit,
-
people'd just go "Oh."
-
Not even like, uh -- just the bottom
-
would drop out of the room,
-
it's a bad feeling.
-
Stern: Afraid to laugh.
-
CK: Yes, just, "Oh no" and
like murmuring, "Oh my goodness."
-
Woman: And then they don't know what to
think of the rest of your material.
-
CK: No, and then you lose credibility
with the audience,
-
and then you get a film of sweat,
-
and you go, "Here I am, and I just said
this shit, and I'm gonna try to save it."
-
But if you repeat that a few times, if you're
-
willing to do that, the bit gets stronger
and stronger, and you find ways
-
to make it work for people.
-
Stern: Yeah, man, oh my God.
That's just so great.