How you say it... - James Erum at tedxyouth@7thstreet

James Erum, a senior at the Ambassador School of Global Leadership, shows that how you say things are just as important as what you say, and how it is important to master the way we speak.

Hi.

So, I want you all
to look at this statement right here.

And, if you guys actually think about it,
if you put emphasis

on each of the different words
in the sentence,

this sentence can have
six different meanings.

For example: I didn´t steal her money;

or, I DIDN'T steal her money;
or, I didn´t STEAL her money;

or, I didn´t steal HER money;
or, I didn´t steal her MONEY.

So, I just...It was pretty interesting
when I first saw that.

So, a couple months ago

my best friend, his name is John,

we were having a discussion,

more like a debate on

how what you say
versus what you are actually saying,

and he thought that what you are saying,

actual words meant more
than what you are saying,

than how you are saying it,
yeah, that's confusing.

But, by show of hands,
and I can't see you guys,

but by show of hands, who thinks
how what you say is important?

OK. And sit down if you think that
what you say is just as important.

Good job! All right. Cool.

So, I mean, of course both are
important in means of communication,

but today I'm just gonna talk
to you guys about

how what you say is just as, if not
more, important than what you say.

So, there are basically two ways
people communicate

which are verbally and non-verbally.

Wow, look at this, that's cool.

All right so in terms of sharing ideas,
we see that

body movements, mostly facial expressions,
is this section right here,

takes the most of it,

and this is the non-verbal side,
right here

which is...so this is pitch, rythm,
octave speed, tone of voice;

and that's when people are talking
and people are listening,

people are basically gauging
your vocal chords

and listening to how your voice sounds

versus how you are saying it,
uh,or not, what you are saying.

So if I say something like

"you saved his life"
or "you SAVED his LIFE",

you know, it sounds like a positive thing

but if I were to say like,

"oh, you saved his life"

then that just sounds mean.

Therefore, the prospect
of how we say something is

just more important than
what we are actually saying.

So in that debate I beat John, I win.

So now I'm going to conclude
my very short presentation

by giving you a few tips on
how to communicate more effectively

whether it be in a presentation
to a group of people

or in a regular conversation with just,
you know, a group of friends.

So your first tip that
I'm going to give you guys

is that you guys
should know your audience,

you have to be aware
of who you are talking to;

are you talking to a group of kids?

or, are you talking to teachers?

Are you talking to your dad?

or, are you talking to your sister?

And if you guys are aware
of who you are talking to

then it just comes
kind of like second nature

'cause you automatically start to
just become aware of what your are saying

and how you are going to say it
to that person,

so that's the next tip

which is to be aware of what you are saying
and how you're going to say it.

And if you guys can discover how
to master these two very easy steps

I guarantee that it will take you far,

and so you should always think before you talk.

Thank you.

(Applause)