-
Bon appetit.
-
Mm. That's good pizza.
-
You know Mary-Kate and Ashley, they just gum it?
-
They just get the flavor.
-
Hey, look at this over here,
it's Tiny Bite Stanley.
-
That's me.
-
Oh, you gonna take a big one?
-
(mocking)
Oh, you think I'm gonna take a big one?
-
Is it gonna be a big one?
He takes the tiniest bites!
-
That's how you get that mouth small.
-
(mouth full)
Can I ask you guys a question?
-
Yeah.
-
(emotional violin music)
-
Are we a squad?
-
You know... this question has been
consuming me lately.
-
I just wanna know.
-
Hey, well I got an answer for ya.
-
OF COURSE we're a squad.
-
(upbeat music begins)
We are?!?
-
We've always been a squad!
-
We will always be a squad!
-
Do you know what a relief it is
to know that I'm in a squad?
-
I don't even need to worry about
being in a squad!
-
I would as far to say that this--
-
-- squad goals.
-
This is squad goals.
-
I get that we're a squad, but--
(upbeat music stops)
-
I'm just not sure that this is
"squad goals" for me.
-
I understand.
-
I get it.
-
Hey squad!
You gotta see this.
-
It's not good.
-
What is it?
-
It's a new site called RateMyFriend.com
and get this...
-
...we've all got bad friend ratings on
there.
-
(Mexican showdown music begins)
Oh damn!
-
Go go go!
-
This way, this way!
-
I'm really sorry about the mess, we'll
(unintelligible)
-
Let me see it.
-
Check it out. Lookit.
-
We all got "bad pal."
-
It says I "lack chill"?
And have a big mouth?
-
Shit!
-
One and a half stars?
"Bad at listening"?
-
"Bad gifter"? I give great gifts!
I'm, like, the gift guy!
-
"Gets girlfriend and doesn't
hang out for two years"?
-
That's not me!
-
Actually, yeah... it's, yeah,
I think that's true.
-
I can't have this online.
This is going to keep me
-
from getting future friends.
-
And Pete, you love making friends.
-
Ohhh, yeah.
-
You know what?
-
I'm gonna prove that I'm a good friend.
-
I'm gonna get you guys some Pepsi.
Do you want some Pepsi?
-
Oh, yeah yeah yeah.
And I'll rub your feet while you go.
-
(overly sweet voice)
You guys are the best!
-
(normal voice)
I can't do this.
-
This just seems fake.
-
Yeah, and our friend rating isn't
even changing.
-
Oh, but please... do not stop
massaging my foot.
-
(chime on wink)
-
Look, we just got to delete
these profiles!
-
Why delete these profiles
when we can just delete ourselves?
-
(gasps)
Are you thinking...?
-
It's time...
-
(all in unison)
To get off the grid!!!
-
("Mr. Sandman" playing)
-
We're getting off the grid!
-
Dip in, buddy.
-
(all screaming)
-
We're almost off the grid!
-
And now for the hardest part.
-
(intense music begins)
Just delete that account.
-
(heavy breathing and whimpering)
-
You can do this, Pete.
You got it buddy.
-
You got it. Good on me.
Good on ya.
-
Get him some water.
Someone get him some water!
-
You get him water!
-
Do you think it worked?
-
doo doo doo... doo doo
-
Sir.
-
You're gonna wanna see this.
-
What is it.
-
We just lost four blips off the grid.
-
Four??? That's practically a whole
squad. How the hell did this happen?
-
They must have shaved off their eyebrows
-
or deleted their Facebooks or something.
-
Guys, we're screwed.
-
There's a new web site called
RateMyGridWatcher.com
-
and we all have bad ratings!
-
(Mexican action music begins)
Oh damn!!!
-
You know what I said earlier?
-
Well, this is squad goals.
-
(all in unison)
This is squad goals!!!