WEBVTT 00:00:01.261 --> 00:00:02.753 I want you to imagine 00:00:02.753 --> 00:00:04.708 what a breakthrough this was 00:00:04.708 --> 00:00:07.136 for women who were victims of violence 00:00:07.136 --> 00:00:09.092 in the 1980s. 00:00:09.092 --> 00:00:12.605 They would come into the emergency room 00:00:12.605 --> 00:00:16.017 with what the police would call "a lovers' quarrel," 00:00:16.017 --> 00:00:19.792 and I would see a woman who was beaten, 00:00:19.792 --> 00:00:24.534 I would see a broken nose and a fractured wrist 00:00:24.534 --> 00:00:26.295 and swollen eyes. 00:00:26.295 --> 00:00:30.333 And as activists, we would take our Polaroid camera, 00:00:30.333 --> 00:00:32.890 we would take her picture, 00:00:32.890 --> 00:00:35.042 we would wait 90 seconds, 00:00:35.042 --> 00:00:38.169 and we would give her the photograph. 00:00:38.169 --> 00:00:40.063 And she would then have 00:00:40.063 --> 00:00:43.290 the evidence she needed to go to court. 00:00:43.290 --> 00:00:47.724 We were making what was invisible visible. NOTE Paragraph 00:00:47.724 --> 00:00:49.695 I've been doing this for 30 years. 00:00:49.695 --> 00:00:51.858 I've been part of a social movement 00:00:51.858 --> 00:00:53.821 that has been working on ending 00:00:53.821 --> 00:00:57.928 violence against women and children. 00:00:57.928 --> 00:01:00.817 And for all those years, 00:01:00.817 --> 00:01:05.549 I've had an absolutely passionate 00:01:05.549 --> 00:01:08.496 and sometimes not popular belief 00:01:08.496 --> 00:01:11.790 that this violence is not inevitable, 00:01:11.790 --> 00:01:14.795 that it is learned, and if it's learned, 00:01:14.795 --> 00:01:18.860 it can be un-learned, and it can be prevented. 00:01:18.860 --> 00:01:26.045 (Applause) NOTE Paragraph 00:01:26.045 --> 00:01:28.008 Why do I believe this? 00:01:28.008 --> 00:01:30.221 Because it's true. 00:01:30.221 --> 00:01:32.458 It is absolutely true. 00:01:32.458 --> 00:01:38.014 Between 1993 and 2010, 00:01:38.014 --> 00:01:41.347 domestic violence among adult women 00:01:41.347 --> 00:01:42.699 in the United States 00:01:42.699 --> 00:01:46.086 has gone down by 64 percent, 00:01:46.086 --> 00:01:48.763 and that is great news. 00:01:48.763 --> 00:01:51.512 (Applause) NOTE Paragraph 00:01:51.512 --> 00:01:54.615 Sixty-four percent. Now, how did we get there? 00:01:54.615 --> 00:01:56.410 Our eyes were wide open. 00:01:56.410 --> 00:01:58.830 Thirty years ago, women were beaten, 00:01:58.830 --> 00:02:00.965 they were stalked, they were raped, 00:02:00.965 --> 00:02:03.506 and no one talked about it. 00:02:03.506 --> 00:02:05.289 There was no justice. 00:02:05.289 --> 00:02:09.913 And as an activist, that was not good enough. 00:02:09.913 --> 00:02:12.384 And so step one on this journey 00:02:12.384 --> 00:02:14.381 is we organized, 00:02:14.381 --> 00:02:17.015 and we created this extraordinary 00:02:17.015 --> 00:02:20.007 underground network of amazing women 00:02:20.007 --> 00:02:21.874 who opened shelters, 00:02:21.874 --> 00:02:23.993 and if they didn't open a shelter, 00:02:23.993 --> 00:02:25.585 they opened their home 00:02:25.585 --> 00:02:28.619 so that women and children could be safe. 00:02:28.619 --> 00:02:30.299 And you know what else we did? 00:02:30.299 --> 00:02:33.764 We had bake sales, we had car washes, 00:02:33.764 --> 00:02:36.298 and we did everything we could do to fundraise, 00:02:36.298 --> 00:02:38.275 and then at one point we said, 00:02:38.275 --> 00:02:40.416 you know, it's time that we went 00:02:40.416 --> 00:02:42.070 to the federal government 00:02:42.070 --> 00:02:44.041 and asked them to pay for these 00:02:44.041 --> 00:02:48.056 extraordinary services that are saving people's lives. 00:02:48.056 --> 00:02:50.517 Right? (Applause) NOTE Paragraph 00:02:50.517 --> 00:02:53.591 And so, step number two, 00:02:53.591 --> 00:02:55.936 we knew we needed to change the laws. 00:02:55.936 --> 00:02:58.223 And so we went to Washington, 00:02:58.223 --> 00:03:03.093 and we lobbied for the first piece of legislation. 00:03:03.093 --> 00:03:05.854 And I remember walking through the halls 00:03:05.854 --> 00:03:08.264 of the U.S. Capitol, 00:03:08.264 --> 00:03:12.622 and I was in my 30s, and my life had purpose, 00:03:12.622 --> 00:03:14.728 and I couldn't imagine 00:03:14.728 --> 00:03:16.855 that anybody would ever challenge 00:03:16.855 --> 00:03:18.966 this important piece of legislation. 00:03:18.966 --> 00:03:21.902 I was probably 30 and naive. 00:03:21.902 --> 00:03:23.984 But I heard about a congressman 00:03:23.984 --> 00:03:26.301 who had a very, very different point of view. 00:03:26.301 --> 00:03:28.100 Do you know what he called 00:03:28.100 --> 00:03:30.851 this important piece of legislation? 00:03:30.851 --> 00:03:34.338 He called it the Take the Fun Out of Marriage Act. 00:03:34.338 --> 00:03:36.517 The Take the Fun Out of Marriage Act. 00:03:36.517 --> 00:03:38.980 Ladies and gentlemen, that was in 1984 00:03:38.980 --> 00:03:42.056 in the United States, and I wish I had Twitter. 00:03:42.056 --> 00:03:45.243 (Laughter) NOTE Paragraph 00:03:45.243 --> 00:03:48.655 Ten years later, after lots of hard work, 00:03:48.655 --> 00:03:51.732 we finally passed the Violence Against Women Act, 00:03:51.732 --> 00:03:53.988 which is a life-changing act 00:03:53.988 --> 00:03:56.842 that has saved so many lives. (Applause) 00:03:56.842 --> 00:03:58.272 Thank you. 00:03:58.272 --> 00:04:01.163 I was proud to be part of that work, 00:04:01.163 --> 00:04:03.613 and it changed the laws 00:04:03.613 --> 00:04:06.464 and it put millions of dollars into local communities. NOTE Paragraph 00:04:06.464 --> 00:04:08.791 And you know what else it did? It collected data. 00:04:08.791 --> 00:04:11.474 And I have to tell you, I'm passionate about data. 00:04:11.474 --> 00:04:14.056 In fact, I am a data nerd. 00:04:14.056 --> 00:04:16.084 I'm sure there are a lot of data nerds here. 00:04:16.084 --> 00:04:17.429 I am a data nerd, 00:04:17.429 --> 00:04:20.064 and the reason for that is I want to make sure 00:04:20.064 --> 00:04:23.510 that if we spend a dollar, that the program works, 00:04:23.510 --> 00:04:27.974 and if it doesn't work, we should change the plan. NOTE Paragraph 00:04:27.974 --> 00:04:31.573 And I also want to say one other thing: 00:04:31.573 --> 00:04:33.788 We are not going to solve this problem 00:04:33.788 --> 00:04:36.641 by building more jails 00:04:36.641 --> 00:04:38.938 or by even building more shelters. 00:04:38.938 --> 00:04:42.131 It is about economic empowerment for women, 00:04:42.131 --> 00:04:44.876 it is about healing kids who are hurt, 00:04:44.876 --> 00:04:48.336 and it is about prevention with a capital P. NOTE Paragraph 00:04:48.336 --> 00:04:52.730 And so, step number three on this journey: 00:04:52.730 --> 00:04:55.682 We know, if we're going to keep making this progress, 00:04:55.682 --> 00:04:57.983 we're going to have to turn up the volume, 00:04:57.983 --> 00:05:00.195 we're going to have to increase the visibility, 00:05:00.195 --> 00:05:03.107 and we're going to have to engage the public. 00:05:03.107 --> 00:05:06.517 And so knowing that, we went to the Advertising Council, 00:05:06.517 --> 00:05:08.838 and we asked them to help us 00:05:08.838 --> 00:05:11.428 build a public education campaign. 00:05:11.428 --> 00:05:13.884 And we looked around the world to Canada 00:05:13.884 --> 00:05:16.526 and Australia and Brazil and parts of Africa, 00:05:16.526 --> 00:05:18.288 and we took this knowledge 00:05:18.288 --> 00:05:20.781 and we built the first national 00:05:20.781 --> 00:05:22.872 public education campaign 00:05:22.872 --> 00:05:25.442 called There's No Excuse for Domestic Violence. 00:05:25.442 --> 00:05:27.641 Take a look at one of our spots. NOTE Paragraph 00:05:27.641 --> 00:05:29.502 (Video) Man: Where's dinner? NOTE Paragraph 00:05:29.502 --> 00:05:33.014 Woman: Well, I thought you'd be home a couple hours ago, and I put everything away, so— NOTE Paragraph 00:05:33.014 --> 00:05:36.058 Man: What is this? Pizza. Woman: If you had just called me, I would have known— NOTE Paragraph 00:05:36.058 --> 00:05:39.231 Man: Dinner? Dinner ready is a pizza? Woman: Honey, please don't be so loud. 00:05:39.231 --> 00:05:41.136 Please don't—Let go of me! NOTE Paragraph 00:05:41.136 --> 00:05:44.030 Man: Get in the kitchen! Woman: No! Help! NOTE Paragraph 00:05:44.030 --> 00:05:46.385 Man: You want to see what hurts? (Slaps woman) NOTE Paragraph 00:05:46.385 --> 00:05:49.803 That's what hurts! That's what hurts! (Breaking glass) NOTE Paragraph 00:05:49.803 --> 00:05:52.044 Woman: Help me! NOTE Paragraph 00:05:52.044 --> 00:05:55.463 ["Children have to sit by and watch. What's your excuse?"] NOTE Paragraph 00:05:55.463 --> 00:05:57.482 Esta Soler: As we were in the process 00:05:57.482 --> 00:05:59.144 of releasing this campaign, 00:05:59.144 --> 00:06:01.327 O.J. Simpson was arrested 00:06:01.327 --> 00:06:05.461 for the murder of his wife and her friend. 00:06:05.461 --> 00:06:07.564 We learned that he had a long history 00:06:07.564 --> 00:06:08.937 of domestic violence. 00:06:08.937 --> 00:06:11.463 The media became fixated. 00:06:11.463 --> 00:06:13.482 The story of domestic violence 00:06:13.482 --> 00:06:14.836 went from the back page, 00:06:14.836 --> 00:06:17.642 but actually from the no-page, to the front page. 00:06:17.642 --> 00:06:20.596 Our ads blanketed the airwaves, 00:06:20.596 --> 00:06:22.946 and women, for the first time, 00:06:22.946 --> 00:06:25.067 started to tell their stories. 00:06:25.067 --> 00:06:28.420 Movements are about moments, 00:06:28.420 --> 00:06:31.014 and we seized this moment. 00:06:31.014 --> 00:06:33.353 And let me just put this in context. 00:06:33.353 --> 00:06:36.489 Before 1980, do you have any idea 00:06:36.489 --> 00:06:39.774 how many articles were in The New York Times 00:06:39.774 --> 00:06:42.787 on domestic violence? 00:06:42.787 --> 00:06:46.451 I'll tell you: 158. 00:06:46.451 --> 00:06:50.962 And in the 2000s, over 7,000. 00:06:50.962 --> 00:06:53.997 We were obviously making a difference. NOTE Paragraph 00:06:53.997 --> 00:06:56.743 But we were still missing a critical element. 00:06:56.743 --> 00:07:02.258 So, step four: We needed to engage men. 00:07:02.258 --> 00:07:04.201 We couldn't solve this problem 00:07:04.201 --> 00:07:07.318 with 50 percent of the population on the sidelines. 00:07:07.318 --> 00:07:09.538 And I already told you I'm a data nerd. 00:07:09.538 --> 00:07:13.161 National polling told us that men felt indicted 00:07:13.161 --> 00:07:15.660 and not invited into this conversation. 00:07:15.660 --> 00:07:19.376 So we wondered, how can we include men? 00:07:19.376 --> 00:07:21.495 How can we get men to talk about 00:07:21.495 --> 00:07:24.239 violence against women and girls? 00:07:24.239 --> 00:07:26.893 And a male friend of mine pulled me aside 00:07:26.893 --> 00:07:30.269 and he said, "You want men to talk about violence 00:07:30.269 --> 00:07:33.186 against women and girls. Men don't talk." 00:07:33.186 --> 00:07:34.902 (Laughter) 00:07:34.902 --> 00:07:37.178 I apologize to the men in the audience. 00:07:37.178 --> 00:07:38.652 I know you do. 00:07:38.652 --> 00:07:40.706 But he said, "Do you know what they do do? 00:07:40.706 --> 00:07:42.385 They do talk to their kids. 00:07:42.385 --> 00:07:45.902 They talk to their kids as parents, as coaches." 00:07:45.902 --> 00:07:47.546 And that's what we did. 00:07:47.546 --> 00:07:49.320 We met men where they were at 00:07:49.320 --> 00:07:50.859 and we built a program. 00:07:50.859 --> 00:07:52.638 And then we had this one event 00:07:52.638 --> 00:07:54.713 that stays in my heart forever 00:07:54.713 --> 00:07:57.298 where a basketball coach 00:07:57.298 --> 00:08:01.220 was talking to a room filled with male athletes 00:08:01.220 --> 00:08:03.801 and men from all walks of life. 00:08:03.801 --> 00:08:05.704 And he was talking about the importance 00:08:05.704 --> 00:08:07.063 of coaching boys into men 00:08:07.063 --> 00:08:09.101 and changing the culture of the locker room 00:08:09.101 --> 00:08:12.370 and giving men the tools to have healthy relationships. 00:08:12.370 --> 00:08:15.298 And all of a sudden, he looked at the back of the room, 00:08:15.298 --> 00:08:17.010 and he saw his daughter, 00:08:17.010 --> 00:08:19.572 and he called out his daughter's name, Michaela, 00:08:19.572 --> 00:08:21.431 and he said, "Michaela, come up here." 00:08:21.431 --> 00:08:23.638 And she's nine years old, and she was kind of shy, 00:08:23.638 --> 00:08:24.999 and she got up there, 00:08:24.999 --> 00:08:27.605 and he said, "Sit down next to me." 00:08:27.605 --> 00:08:29.728 She sat right down next to him. 00:08:29.728 --> 00:08:32.536 He gave her this big hug, and he said, 00:08:32.536 --> 00:08:35.788 "People ask me why I do this work. 00:08:35.788 --> 00:08:38.535 I do this work because I'm her dad, 00:08:38.535 --> 00:08:42.230 and I don't want anyone ever to hurt her." 00:08:42.230 --> 00:08:45.582 And as a parent, I get it. 00:08:45.582 --> 00:08:47.738 I get it, 00:08:47.738 --> 00:08:50.621 knowing that there are so many sexual assaults 00:08:50.621 --> 00:08:52.489 on college campuses 00:08:52.489 --> 00:08:56.029 that are so widespread and so under-reported. 00:08:56.029 --> 00:08:58.134 We've done a lot for adult women. 00:08:58.134 --> 00:09:01.201 We've got to do a better job for our kids. 00:09:01.201 --> 00:09:04.391 We just do. We have to. (Applause) NOTE Paragraph 00:09:04.391 --> 00:09:06.461 We've come a long way 00:09:06.461 --> 00:09:09.472 since the days of the Polaroid. 00:09:09.472 --> 00:09:12.625 Technology has been our friend. 00:09:12.625 --> 00:09:16.684 The mobile phone is a global game changer 00:09:16.684 --> 00:09:18.647 for the empowerment of women, 00:09:18.647 --> 00:09:22.852 and Facebook and Twitter and Google and YouTube 00:09:22.852 --> 00:09:26.657 and all the social media helps us organize 00:09:26.657 --> 00:09:30.108 and tell our story in a powerful way. 00:09:30.108 --> 00:09:32.606 And so those of you in this audience 00:09:32.606 --> 00:09:34.447 who have helped build those applications 00:09:34.447 --> 00:09:36.808 and those platforms, as an organizer, 00:09:36.808 --> 00:09:39.218 I say, thank you very much. 00:09:39.218 --> 00:09:41.293 Really. I clap for you. 00:09:41.293 --> 00:09:44.274 (Applause) NOTE Paragraph 00:09:44.274 --> 00:09:47.021 I'm the daughter of a man 00:09:47.021 --> 00:09:49.292 who joined one club in his life, 00:09:49.292 --> 00:09:52.966 the Optimist Club. 00:09:52.966 --> 00:09:55.728 You can't make that one up. 00:09:55.728 --> 00:09:59.278 And it is his spirit and his optimism 00:09:59.278 --> 00:10:01.188 that is in my DNA. 00:10:01.188 --> 00:10:03.050 I have been doing this work 00:10:03.050 --> 00:10:05.204 for over 30 years, 00:10:05.204 --> 00:10:07.901 and I am convinced, now more than ever, 00:10:07.901 --> 00:10:11.574 in the capacity of human beings to change. 00:10:11.574 --> 00:10:15.113 I believe we can bend the arc of human history 00:10:15.113 --> 00:10:18.131 toward compassion and equality, 00:10:18.131 --> 00:10:20.949 and I also fundamentally believe 00:10:20.949 --> 00:10:22.987 and passionately believe 00:10:22.987 --> 00:10:26.117 that this violence does not have to be part 00:10:26.117 --> 00:10:27.942 of the human condition. 00:10:27.942 --> 00:10:31.295 And I ask you, stand with us 00:10:31.295 --> 00:10:35.110 as we create futures without violence 00:10:35.110 --> 00:10:39.530 for women and girls and men and boys everywhere. NOTE Paragraph 00:10:39.530 --> 00:10:41.692 Thank you very much. NOTE Paragraph 00:10:41.692 --> 00:10:47.803 (Applause)