0:00:00.763,0:00:05.737
You're looking at a woman[br]who was publicly silent for a decade.

0:00:06.464,0:00:08.290
Obviously, that's changed,

0:00:08.863,0:00:10.277
but only recently.

0:00:10.971,0:00:15.408
It was several months ago that I gave[br]my very first major public talk,

0:00:15.432,0:00:18.193
at the Forbes "30 Under 30 Summit" --

0:00:18.217,0:00:22.431
1,500 brilliant people,[br]all under the age of 30.

0:00:23.223,0:00:29.625
That meant that in 1998,[br]the oldest among the group were only 14,

0:00:29.649,0:00:31.969
and the youngest, just four.

0:00:32.967,0:00:37.994
I joked with them that some might only[br]have heard of me from rap songs.

0:00:38.485,0:00:40.487
Yes, I'm in rap songs.

0:00:40.511,0:00:41.575
(Laughter)

0:00:41.599,0:00:44.583
Almost 40 rap songs.

0:00:44.607,0:00:46.165
(Laughter)

0:00:46.590,0:00:49.407
But the night of my speech,[br]a surprising thing happened.

0:00:50.144,0:00:56.116
At the age of 41, I was hit on[br]by a 27-year-old guy.

0:00:56.140,0:00:57.142
(Laughter)

0:00:57.166,0:00:58.725
I know, right?

0:01:00.301,0:01:02.698
He was charming, and I was flattered,

0:01:02.722,0:01:04.457
and I declined.

0:01:05.212,0:01:07.732
You know what his unsuccessful[br]pickup line was?

0:01:08.910,0:01:11.671
He could make me feel 22 again.

0:01:11.695,0:01:15.739
(Laughter)

0:01:15.763,0:01:18.613
(Applause)

0:01:18.637,0:01:20.630
I realized, later that night,

0:01:20.654,0:01:26.139
I'm probably the only person over 40[br]who does not want to be 22 again.

0:01:26.163,0:01:29.085
(Laughter)

0:01:29.109,0:01:34.886
(Applause)

0:01:35.554,0:01:39.747
At the age of 22,[br]I fell in love with my boss.

0:01:40.723,0:01:43.091
And at the age of 24,

0:01:43.115,0:01:45.703
I learned the devastating consequences.

0:01:47.460,0:01:50.847
Can I see a show of hands of anyone here

0:01:50.871,0:01:54.988
who didn't make a mistake[br]or do something they regretted at 22?

0:01:57.232,0:01:59.718
Yep. That's what I thought.

0:02:00.473,0:02:06.230
So like me, at 22, a few of you[br]may have also taken wrong turns

0:02:06.254,0:02:09.584
and fallen in love with the wrong person,

0:02:09.608,0:02:11.307
maybe even your boss.

0:02:12.313,0:02:14.035
Unlike me, though,

0:02:14.059,0:02:18.516
your boss probably wasn't the president[br]of the United States of America.

0:02:18.540,0:02:19.580
(Laughter)

0:02:19.604,0:02:22.084
Of course, life is full of surprises.

0:02:23.877,0:02:28.737
Not a day goes by that I'm not[br]reminded of my mistake,

0:02:28.761,0:02:31.034
and I regret that mistake deeply.

0:02:33.570,0:02:40.177
In 1998, after having been swept up[br]into an improbable romance,

0:02:40.201,0:02:45.961
I was then swept up into the eye[br]of a political, legal and media maelstrom

0:02:45.985,0:02:48.192
like we had never seen before.

0:02:49.082,0:02:51.710
Remember, just a few years earlier,

0:02:51.734,0:02:55.047
news was consumed from just three places:

0:02:55.071,0:02:57.313
reading a newspaper or magazine,

0:02:57.337,0:02:59.051
listening to the radio

0:02:59.075,0:03:00.658
or watching television.

0:03:00.682,0:03:02.280
That was it.

0:03:02.304,0:03:05.042
But that wasn't my fate.

0:03:06.259,0:03:09.734
Instead, this scandal was brought to you

0:03:09.758,0:03:11.636
by the digital revolution.

0:03:12.430,0:03:15.862
That meant we could access[br]all the information we wanted,

0:03:15.886,0:03:19.420
when we wanted it, anytime, anywhere.

0:03:20.976,0:03:25.033
And when the story broke in January 1998,

0:03:25.057,0:03:27.034
it broke online.

0:03:27.835,0:03:32.313
It was the first time the traditional news[br]was usurped by the internet

0:03:32.337,0:03:34.076
for a major news story --

0:03:35.059,0:03:38.917
a click that reverberated[br]around the world.

0:03:40.560,0:03:42.898
What that meant for me personally

0:03:42.922,0:03:48.311
was that overnight, I went from being[br]a completely private figure

0:03:48.335,0:03:52.076
to a publicly humiliated one, worldwide.

0:03:53.272,0:03:59.262
I was patient zero of losing[br]a personal reputation on a global scale

0:03:59.286,0:04:01.421
almost instantaneously.

0:04:03.381,0:04:06.257
This rush to judgment,[br]enabled by technology,

0:04:06.281,0:04:09.358
led to mobs of virtual stone-throwers.

0:04:09.889,0:04:12.803
Granted, it was before social media,

0:04:12.827,0:04:16.207
but people could still comment online,

0:04:16.231,0:04:17.906
e-mail stories,

0:04:17.930,0:04:20.941
and, of course, e-mail cruel jokes.

0:04:22.714,0:04:25.977
News sources plastered[br]photos of me all over

0:04:26.001,0:04:29.581
to sell newspapers, banner ads online,

0:04:29.605,0:04:31.906
and to keep people tuned to the TV.

0:04:33.962,0:04:39.353
Do you recall a particular image of me,[br]say, wearing a beret?

0:04:41.480,0:04:44.084
Now, I admit I made mistakes --

0:04:44.108,0:04:46.254
especially wearing that beret.

0:04:46.278,0:04:48.204
(Laughter)

0:04:48.228,0:04:50.890
But the attention and judgment[br]that I received --

0:04:50.914,0:04:54.237
not the story, but that[br]I personally received --

0:04:54.261,0:04:55.821
was unprecedented.

0:04:56.713,0:04:59.163
I was branded as a tramp,

0:05:00.029,0:05:01.626
tart,

0:05:01.650,0:05:03.340
slut,

0:05:03.364,0:05:04.975
whore,

0:05:04.999,0:05:06.149
bimbo,

0:05:06.855,0:05:08.972
and, of course, "that woman."

0:05:10.662,0:05:12.709
I was seen by many,

0:05:12.733,0:05:15.196
but actually known by few.

0:05:16.863,0:05:19.958
And I get it: it was easy to forget

0:05:19.982,0:05:22.763
that that woman was dimensional,

0:05:22.787,0:05:24.554
had a soul

0:05:24.578,0:05:26.170
and was once unbroken.

0:05:29.346,0:05:33.882
When this happened to me 17 years ago,[br]there was no name for it.

0:05:34.604,0:05:38.521
Now we call it "cyberbullying"[br]and "online harassment."

0:05:40.584,0:05:43.700
Today, I want to share[br]some of my experience with you,

0:05:43.724,0:05:48.012
talk about how that experience has helped[br]shape my cultural observations,

0:05:49.201,0:05:52.597
and how I hope my past experience[br]can lead to a change

0:05:52.621,0:05:55.241
that results in less suffering for others.

0:05:57.887,0:06:03.136
In 1998, I lost my reputation[br]and my dignity.

0:06:03.734,0:06:06.321
I lost almost everything.

0:06:07.226,0:06:09.231
And I almost lost my life.

0:06:13.031,0:06:14.809
Let me paint a picture for you.

0:06:17.365,0:06:20.215
It is September of 1998.

0:06:20.866,0:06:23.690
I'm sitting in a windowless office room

0:06:23.714,0:06:26.197
inside the Office[br]of the Independent Counsel,

0:06:27.213,0:06:30.040
underneath humming fluorescent lights.

0:06:30.892,0:06:33.997
I'm listening to the sound of my voice,

0:06:34.974,0:06:38.350
my voice on surreptitiously[br]taped phone calls

0:06:38.374,0:06:41.034
that a supposed friend[br]had made the year before.

0:06:42.018,0:06:45.307
I'm here because[br]I've been legally required

0:06:45.331,0:06:50.997
to personally authenticate[br]all 20 hours of taped conversation.

0:06:52.916,0:06:56.997
For the past eight months,[br]the mysterious content of these tapes

0:06:57.021,0:06:59.897
has hung like the sword[br]of Damocles over my head.

0:07:00.747,0:07:03.714
I mean, who can remember[br]what they said a year ago?

0:07:05.587,0:07:08.599
Scared and mortified, I listen,

0:07:10.846,0:07:14.755
listen as I prattle on about the flotsam[br]and jetsam of the day;

0:07:15.771,0:07:19.128
listen as I confess my love[br]for the president,

0:07:19.152,0:07:21.337
and, of course, my heartbreak;

0:07:22.710,0:07:28.134
listen to my sometimes catty,[br]sometimes churlish, sometimes silly self

0:07:28.158,0:07:32.031
being cruel, unforgiving, uncouth;

0:07:33.031,0:07:38.340
listen, deeply, deeply ashamed,[br]to the worst version of myself,

0:07:39.363,0:07:41.719
a self I don't even recognize.

0:07:44.537,0:07:48.382
A few days later, the Starr Report[br]is released to Congress,

0:07:48.406,0:07:53.204
and all of those tapes and transcripts,[br]those stolen words, form a part of it.

0:07:54.694,0:07:58.340
That people can read the transcripts[br]is horrific enough.

0:07:59.221,0:08:00.742
But a few weeks later,

0:08:02.044,0:08:04.709
the audiotapes are aired on TV,

0:08:04.733,0:08:07.941
and significant portions[br]made available online.

0:08:10.597,0:08:14.015
The public humiliation was excruciating.

0:08:14.911,0:08:17.304
Life was almost unbearable.

0:08:21.050,0:08:26.095
This was not something that happened[br]with regularity back then in 1998,

0:08:26.119,0:08:31.812
and by "this," I mean the stealing[br]of people's private words, actions,

0:08:31.836,0:08:34.299
conversations or photos,

0:08:34.323,0:08:35.942
and then making them public --

0:08:36.776,0:08:38.458
public without consent,

0:08:39.214,0:08:41.021
public without context

0:08:41.849,0:08:44.129
and public without compassion.

0:08:45.630,0:08:49.236
Fast-forward 12 years, to 2010,

0:08:49.260,0:08:51.706
and now social media has been born.

0:08:52.888,0:08:57.897
The landscape has sadly become much[br]more populated with instances like mine,

0:08:57.921,0:09:00.409
whether or not someone[br]actually made a mistake,

0:09:01.128,0:09:05.584
and now, it's for both public[br]and private people.

0:09:06.682,0:09:11.611
The consequences for some[br]have become dire, very dire.

0:09:14.198,0:09:18.878
I was on the phone with my mom[br]in September of 2010,

0:09:18.902,0:09:22.296
and we were talking about the news[br]of a young college freshman

0:09:22.320,0:09:24.053
from Rutgers University,

0:09:24.077,0:09:25.756
named Tyler Clementi.

0:09:26.724,0:09:32.301
Sweet, sensitive, creative Tyler[br]was secretly webcammed by his roommate

0:09:32.325,0:09:34.531
while being intimate with another man.

0:09:36.666,0:09:39.271
When the online world[br]learned of this incident,

0:09:39.295,0:09:42.430
the ridicule and cyberbullying ignited.

0:09:44.464,0:09:45.692
A few days later,

0:09:46.670,0:09:49.641
Tyler jumped from[br]the George Washington Bridge

0:09:49.665,0:09:50.900
to his death.

0:09:51.524,0:09:52.913
He was 18.

0:09:55.453,0:10:00.061
My mom was beside herself about[br]what happened to Tyler and his family,

0:10:00.085,0:10:02.918
and she was gutted with pain

0:10:02.942,0:10:05.761
in a way that I just couldn't[br]quite understand.

0:10:06.618,0:10:11.164
And then eventually,[br]I realized she was reliving 1998,

0:10:12.021,0:10:15.954
reliving a time when she sat[br]by my bed every night,

0:10:18.570,0:10:19.721
reliving -- (Chokes up)

0:10:19.745,0:10:24.347
sorry -- reliving a time when she made me[br]shower with the bathroom door open,

0:10:25.416,0:10:29.065
and reliving a time[br]when both of my parents feared

0:10:29.089,0:10:31.888
that I would be humiliated to death,

0:10:31.912,0:10:33.203
literally.

0:10:36.339,0:10:40.030
Today, too many parents[br]haven't had the chance

0:10:40.054,0:10:43.047
to step in and rescue their loved ones.

0:10:43.071,0:10:46.849
Too many have learned[br]of their child's suffering and humiliation

0:10:46.873,0:10:48.862
after it was too late.

0:10:50.116,0:10:53.951
Tyler's tragic, senseless death[br]was a turning point for me.

0:10:54.485,0:10:58.332
It served to recontextualize[br]my experiences,

0:10:58.356,0:11:02.894
and I then began to look at the world[br]of humiliation and bullying around me

0:11:02.918,0:11:04.403
and see something different.

0:11:06.593,0:11:09.575
In 1998, we had no way of knowing

0:11:09.599,0:11:14.379
where this brave new technology[br]called the internet would take us.

0:11:14.403,0:11:18.491
Since then, it has connected people[br]in unimaginable ways --

0:11:18.515,0:11:20.567
joining lost siblings,

0:11:20.591,0:11:22.158
saving lives,

0:11:22.182,0:11:24.110
launching revolutions ...

0:11:25.087,0:11:29.192
But the darkness, cyberbullying,[br]and slut-shaming that I experienced

0:11:29.216,0:11:30.484
had mushroomed.

0:11:32.874,0:11:37.575
Every day online, people --[br]especially young people,

0:11:37.599,0:11:40.809
who are not developmentally[br]equipped to handle this --

0:11:40.833,0:11:43.187
are so abused and humiliated

0:11:43.211,0:11:46.329
that they can't imagine living[br]to the next day.

0:11:46.353,0:11:48.628
And some, tragically, don't.

0:11:49.302,0:11:51.453
And there's nothing virtual about that.

0:11:52.892,0:11:59.374
Childline, a UK nonprofit that's focused[br]on helping young people on various issues,

0:11:59.398,0:12:02.470
released a staggering statistic[br]late last year:

0:12:03.558,0:12:10.000
from 2012 to 2013,[br]there was an 87 percent increase

0:12:10.024,0:12:13.445
in calls and e-mails[br]related to cyberbullying.

0:12:14.834,0:12:17.126
A meta-analysis[br]done out of the Netherlands

0:12:17.150,0:12:19.007
showed that for the first time,

0:12:19.031,0:12:24.179
cyberbullying was leading[br]to suicidal ideations

0:12:24.203,0:12:27.181
more significantly than offline bullying.

0:12:28.379,0:12:31.699
And you know, what shocked me --[br]although it shouldn't have --

0:12:31.723,0:12:33.765
was other research last year

0:12:33.789,0:12:39.204
that determined humiliation[br]was a more intensely felt emotion

0:12:39.228,0:12:42.704
than either happiness or even anger.

0:12:44.371,0:12:47.022
Cruelty to others is nothing new.

0:12:48.006,0:12:53.709
But online, technologically[br]enhanced shaming is amplified,

0:12:53.733,0:12:55.301
uncontained

0:12:55.325,0:12:57.420
and permanently accessible.

0:12:59.213,0:13:04.765
The echo of embarrassment used to extend[br]only as far as your family, village,

0:13:04.789,0:13:06.451
school or community.

0:13:06.998,0:13:10.080
But now, it's the online community too.

0:13:10.876,0:13:15.312
Millions of people, often anonymously,[br]can stab you with their words,

0:13:15.336,0:13:17.028
and that's a lot of pain.

0:13:17.735,0:13:22.918
And there are no perimeters around[br]how many people can publicly observe you

0:13:22.942,0:13:25.529
and put you in a public stockade.

0:13:27.415,0:13:32.160
There is a very personal price[br]to public humiliation,

0:13:33.239,0:13:37.017
and the growth of the internet[br]has jacked up that price.

0:13:40.045,0:13:41.954
For nearly two decades now,

0:13:41.978,0:13:46.734
we have slowly been sowing the seeds[br]of shame and public humiliation

0:13:46.758,0:13:50.592
in our cultural soil,[br]both on- and offline.

0:13:51.968,0:13:56.962
Gossip websites, paparazzi,[br]reality programming, politics,

0:13:56.986,0:14:00.084
news outlets and sometimes hackers

0:14:00.108,0:14:02.375
all traffic in shame.

0:14:02.837,0:14:07.371
It's led to desensitization[br]and a permissive environment online,

0:14:07.395,0:14:12.119
which lends itself to trolling,[br]invasion of privacy and cyberbullying.

0:14:13.217,0:14:17.282
This shift has created[br]what Professor Nicolaus Mills calls

0:14:17.306,0:14:19.750
"a culture of humiliation."

0:14:20.836,0:14:25.161
Consider a few prominent examples[br]just from the past six months alone.

0:14:26.015,0:14:31.076
Snapchat, the service which is used[br]mainly by younger generations

0:14:31.100,0:14:35.650
and claims that its messages[br]only have the life span of a few seconds.

0:14:35.674,0:14:38.434
You can imagine the range[br]of content that that gets.

0:14:39.026,0:14:44.626
A third-party app which Snapchatters use[br]to preserve the life span of the messages

0:14:44.650,0:14:46.143
was hacked,

0:14:46.167,0:14:52.693
and 100,000 personal conversations,[br]photos and videos were leaked online,

0:14:52.717,0:14:55.915
to now have a life span of forever.

0:14:56.983,0:15:01.171
Jennifer Lawrence and several other actors[br]had their iCloud accounts hacked,

0:15:01.195,0:15:05.119
and private, intimate, nude photos[br]were plastered across the internet

0:15:05.143,0:15:06.844
without their permission.

0:15:06.868,0:15:11.306
One gossip website[br]had over five million hits

0:15:11.330,0:15:12.913
for this one story.

0:15:14.360,0:15:17.369
And what about[br]the Sony Pictures cyberhacking?

0:15:18.422,0:15:21.499
The documents which received[br]the most attention

0:15:21.523,0:15:26.131
were private e-mails that had[br]maximum public embarrassment value.

0:15:28.146,0:15:30.502
But in this culture of humiliation,

0:15:30.526,0:15:34.586
there is another kind of price tag[br]attached to public shaming.

0:15:35.400,0:15:38.563
The price does not measure[br]the cost to the victim,

0:15:38.587,0:15:40.930
which Tyler and too many others --

0:15:40.954,0:15:45.888
notably, women, minorities[br]and members of the LGBTQ community --

0:15:45.912,0:15:47.079
have paid,

0:15:47.103,0:15:51.659
but the price measures the profit[br]of those who prey on them.

0:15:53.196,0:15:56.662
This invasion of others is a raw material,

0:15:56.686,0:16:02.630
efficiently and ruthlessly mined,[br]packaged and sold at a profit.

0:16:03.479,0:16:09.096
A marketplace has emerged[br]where public humiliation is a commodity,

0:16:09.120,0:16:11.356
and shame is an industry.

0:16:13.189,0:16:14.706
How is the money made?

0:16:15.699,0:16:16.859
Clicks.

0:16:17.493,0:16:19.819
The more shame, the more clicks.

0:16:19.843,0:16:23.223
The more clicks,[br]the more advertising dollars.

0:16:25.428,0:16:27.287
We're in a dangerous cycle.

0:16:27.914,0:16:30.534
The more we click on this kind of gossip,

0:16:30.558,0:16:33.487
the more numb we get[br]to the human lives behind it.

0:16:34.080,0:16:37.266
And the more numb we get,[br]the more we click.

0:16:39.520,0:16:40.699
All the while,

0:16:40.723,0:16:44.895
someone is making money off of the back[br]of someone else's suffering.

0:16:46.830,0:16:49.334
With every click, we make a choice.

0:16:49.358,0:16:52.839
The more we saturate our culture[br]with public shaming,

0:16:52.863,0:16:54.770
the more accepted it is,

0:16:54.794,0:16:59.109
the more we will see behavior[br]like cyberbullying, trolling,

0:16:59.133,0:17:01.098
some forms of hacking

0:17:01.122,0:17:02.765
and online harassment.

0:17:03.443,0:17:08.874
Why? Because they all have[br]humiliation at their cores.

0:17:11.230,0:17:15.503
This behavior is a symptom[br]of the culture we've created.

0:17:15.527,0:17:16.843
Just think about it.

0:17:18.993,0:17:22.034
Changing behavior begins[br]with evolving beliefs.

0:17:22.772,0:17:25.943
We've seen that to be true[br]with racism, homophobia

0:17:25.967,0:17:27.838
and plenty of other biases,

0:17:27.862,0:17:29.633
today and in the past.

0:17:30.695,0:17:33.719
As we've changed beliefs[br]about same-sex marriage,

0:17:33.743,0:17:37.108
more people have been offered[br]equal freedoms.

0:17:37.978,0:17:40.764
When we began valuing sustainability,

0:17:40.788,0:17:42.827
more people began to recycle.

0:17:43.434,0:17:46.932
So as far as our culture[br]of humiliation goes,

0:17:46.956,0:17:49.603
what we need is a cultural revolution.

0:17:50.481,0:17:54.250
Public shaming[br]as a blood sport has to stop,

0:17:54.274,0:17:58.339
and it's time for an intervention[br]on the internet and in our culture.

0:17:59.202,0:18:01.642
The shift begins with something simple,

0:18:01.666,0:18:03.010
but it's not easy.

0:18:03.985,0:18:08.443
We need to return to a long-held[br]value of compassion,

0:18:08.467,0:18:10.420
compassion and empathy.

0:18:11.071,0:18:13.790
Online, we've got a compassion deficit,

0:18:13.814,0:18:15.603
an empathy crisis.

0:18:17.413,0:18:20.779
Researcher Brené Brown said, and I quote,

0:18:20.803,0:18:23.329
"Shame can't survive empathy."

0:18:24.305,0:18:28.669
Shame cannot survive empathy.

0:18:30.515,0:18:33.308
I've seen some very dark days in my life.

0:18:34.221,0:18:40.089
It was the compassion and empathy[br]from my family, friends, professionals

0:18:41.002,0:18:42.742
and sometimes even strangers

0:18:42.766,0:18:44.305
that saved me.

0:18:45.345,0:18:48.536
Even empathy from one person[br]can make a difference.

0:18:50.369,0:18:52.733
The theory of minority influence,

0:18:52.757,0:18:56.171
proposed by social psychologist[br]Serge Moscovici,

0:18:56.195,0:18:58.801
says that even in small numbers,

0:18:58.825,0:19:01.001
when there's consistency over time,

0:19:01.025,0:19:02.575
change can happen.

0:19:03.794,0:19:07.037
In the online world,[br]we can foster minority influence

0:19:07.061,0:19:08.849
by becoming upstanders.

0:19:09.353,0:19:13.150
To become an upstander means[br]instead of bystander apathy,

0:19:13.174,0:19:17.764
we can post a positive comment for someone[br]or report a bullying situation.

0:19:18.230,0:19:22.461
Trust me, compassionate comments[br]help abate the negativity.

0:19:23.202,0:19:27.073
We can also counteract the culture[br]by supporting organizations

0:19:27.097,0:19:29.174
that deal with these kinds of issues,

0:19:29.198,0:19:31.982
like the Tyler Clementi[br]Foundation in the US;

0:19:32.780,0:19:35.413
in the UK, there's Anti-Bullying Pro;

0:19:35.437,0:19:38.099
and in Australia, there's PROJECT ROCKIT.

0:19:40.206,0:19:45.532
We talk a lot about our right[br]to freedom of expression.

0:19:46.333,0:19:49.410
But we need to talk more[br]about our responsibility

0:19:49.434,0:19:51.186
to freedom of expression.

0:19:52.051,0:19:54.296
We all want to be heard,

0:19:54.320,0:19:59.080
but let's acknowledge the difference[br]between speaking up with intention

0:19:59.104,0:20:01.856
and speaking up for attention.

0:20:03.493,0:20:06.478
The internet is[br]the superhighway for the id.

0:20:07.597,0:20:12.255
But online, showing empathy[br]to others benefits us all

0:20:12.279,0:20:15.181
and helps create a safer and better world.

0:20:15.905,0:20:18.957
We need to communicate[br]online with compassion,

0:20:18.981,0:20:21.311
consume news with compassion

0:20:21.335,0:20:23.409
and click with compassion.

0:20:24.114,0:20:28.261
Just imagine walking a mile[br]in someone else's headline.

0:20:31.261,0:20:34.246
I'd like to end on a personal note.

0:20:35.561,0:20:37.365
In the past nine months,

0:20:37.389,0:20:40.762
the question I've been[br]asked the most is "Why?"

0:20:40.786,0:20:41.946
Why now?

0:20:41.970,0:20:44.524
Why was I sticking my head[br]above the parapet?

0:20:45.193,0:20:47.806
You can read between the lines[br]in those questions,

0:20:47.830,0:20:50.587
and the answer has nothing[br]to do with politics.

0:20:51.471,0:20:56.306
The top-note answer was and is[br]"Because it's time."

0:20:57.166,0:21:00.007
Time to stop tiptoeing around my past,

0:21:00.031,0:21:03.021
time to stop living a life of opprobrium

0:21:03.045,0:21:05.430
and time to take back my narrative.

0:21:06.510,0:21:10.210
It's also not just about saving myself.

0:21:11.003,0:21:14.649
Anyone who is suffering from shame[br]and public humiliation

0:21:14.673,0:21:16.446
needs to know one thing:

0:21:17.446,0:21:19.169
You can survive it.

0:21:20.016,0:21:21.416
I know it's hard.

0:21:22.572,0:21:26.085
It may not be painless, quick or easy,

0:21:26.109,0:21:30.041
but you can insist[br]on a different ending to your story.

0:21:30.942,0:21:32.980
Have compassion for yourself.

0:21:34.270,0:21:36.542
We all deserve compassion

0:21:37.390,0:21:42.751
and to live both online and off[br]in a more compassionate world.

0:21:43.684,0:21:45.181
Thank you for listening.

0:21:45.205,0:21:52.077
(Applause and cheers)