0:00:01.008,0:00:02.808
I am failing as a woman,

0:00:02.832,0:00:05.127
I am failing as a feminist.

0:00:05.452,0:00:08.229
I have passionate opinions[br]about gender equality,

0:00:08.229,0:00:12.290
but I worry that to freely accept[br]the label of "feminist,"

0:00:12.314,0:00:14.613
would not be fair to good feminists.

0:00:15.184,0:00:17.557
I'm a feminist, but I'm a rather bad one.

0:00:17.581,0:00:20.445
Oh, so I call myself a Bad Feminist.

0:00:20.469,0:00:22.802
Or at least, I wrote an essay,

0:00:22.826,0:00:25.001
and then I wrote a book[br]called "Bad Feminist,"

0:00:25.025,0:00:28.461
and then in interviews, people started[br]calling me The Bad Feminist.

0:00:28.485,0:00:29.651
(Laughter)

0:00:29.675,0:00:33.712
So, what started as a bit[br]of an inside joke with myself

0:00:33.736,0:00:35.417
and a willful provocation,

0:00:35.441,0:00:37.091
has become a thing.

0:00:37.996,0:00:39.456
Let me take a step back.

0:00:40.076,0:00:41.312
When I was younger,

0:00:41.336,0:00:43.249
mostly in my teens and 20s,

0:00:43.273,0:00:45.678
I had strange ideas about feminists

0:00:45.702,0:00:49.478
as hairy, angry, man-hating,[br]sex-hating women --

0:00:49.502,0:00:51.081
as if those are bad things.

0:00:51.105,0:00:53.834
(Laughter)

0:00:54.978,0:00:58.416
These days, I look at how[br]women are treated the world over,

0:00:58.440,0:01:02.726
and anger, in particular, seems[br]like a perfectly reasonable response.

0:01:02.750,0:01:04.495
But back then,

0:01:04.519,0:01:06.322
I worried about the tone people used[br]

0:01:06.322,0:01:09.322
when suggesting I might be a feminist.

0:01:09.322,0:01:11.880
The feminist label was an accusation,

0:01:11.904,0:01:14.293
it was an "F" word, and not a nice one.

0:01:14.762,0:01:17.658
I was labeled a woman[br]who doesn't play by the rules,

0:01:17.682,0:01:19.303
who expects too much,

0:01:19.327,0:01:21.320
who thinks far too highly of myself,

0:01:21.344,0:01:25.458
by daring to believe I'm equal --[br](Coughs) -- superior to a man.

0:01:26.040,0:01:27.885
You don't want to be that rebel woman,

0:01:27.909,0:01:30.394
until you realize that you[br]very much are that woman,

0:01:30.418,0:01:32.915
and cannot imagine being anyone else.

0:01:33.344,0:01:35.364
As I got older, I began to accept

0:01:35.388,0:01:38.721
that I am, indeed, a feminist,[br]and a proud one.

0:01:38.745,0:01:41.539
I hold certain truths to be self-evident:

0:01:41.563,0:01:44.015
Women are equal to men.

0:01:44.039,0:01:46.820
We deserve equal pay for equal work.

0:01:46.844,0:01:49.828
We have the right to move[br]through the world as we choose,

0:01:49.852,0:01:51.819
free from harassment or violence.

0:01:52.233,0:01:55.787
We have the right to easy,[br]affordable access to birth control,

0:01:55.811,0:01:57.708
and reproductive services.

0:01:57.732,0:02:00.303
We have the right to make choices[br]about our bodies,

0:02:00.327,0:02:04.480
free from legislative oversight[br]or evangelical doctrine.

0:02:04.504,0:02:05.988
We have the right to respect.

0:02:06.679,0:02:07.885
There's more.

0:02:07.909,0:02:10.124
When we talk about the needs of women,

0:02:10.148,0:02:13.553
we have to consider[br]the other identities we inhabit.

0:02:13.577,0:02:15.034
We are not just women.

0:02:15.518,0:02:17.365
We are people with different bodies,

0:02:17.389,0:02:20.404
gender expressions, faiths, sexualities,

0:02:20.428,0:02:23.319
class backgrounds, abilities,[br]and so much more.

0:02:23.708,0:02:25.105
We need to take into account

0:02:25.129,0:02:27.565
these differences and how they affect us,

0:02:27.589,0:02:30.291
as much as we account for[br]what we have in common.

0:02:30.680,0:02:34.299
Without this kind of inclusion,[br]our feminism is nothing.

0:02:35.220,0:02:38.871
I hold these truths to be self-evident,[br]but let me be clear:

0:02:38.895,0:02:40.032
I'm a mess.

0:02:40.056,0:02:42.313
I am full of contradictions.

0:02:42.337,0:02:45.257
There are many ways in which[br]I'm doing feminism wrong.

0:02:45.876,0:02:47.392
I have another confession.

0:02:47.416,0:02:51.752
When I drive to work, I listen[br]to thuggish rap at a very loud volume.

0:02:51.776,0:02:53.283
(Laughter)

0:02:53.307,0:02:55.636
Even though the lyrics[br]are degrading to women --

0:02:55.660,0:02:58.455
these lyrics offend me to my core --

0:02:58.479,0:03:01.479
the classic Yin Yang Twins[br]song "Salt Shaker" --

0:03:01.503,0:03:02.955
it is amazing.

0:03:02.979,0:03:05.445
(Laughter)

0:03:05.469,0:03:08.397
"Make it work with your wet t-shirt.

0:03:08.421,0:03:12.181
Bitch, you gotta shake it[br]'til your camel starts to hurt!"

0:03:12.205,0:03:13.363
(Laughter)

0:03:13.387,0:03:14.412
Think about it.

0:03:14.436,0:03:17.324
(Laughter)

0:03:17.348,0:03:18.666
Poetry, right?

0:03:18.690,0:03:22.350
I am utterly mortified[br]by my music choices.

0:03:22.374,0:03:24.286
(Laughter)

0:03:24.310,0:03:26.594
I firmly believe in man work,

0:03:26.618,0:03:29.027
which is anything I don't[br]want to do, including --

0:03:29.051,0:03:30.932
(Laughter) --

0:03:30.956,0:03:33.110
all domestic tasks,

0:03:33.134,0:03:37.443
but also: bug killing, trash removal,[br]lawn care and vehicle maintenance.

0:03:38.014,0:03:39.881
I want no part of any of that.

0:03:39.905,0:03:40.978
(Laughter)

0:03:41.002,0:03:42.899
Pink is my favorite color.

0:03:42.923,0:03:45.951
I enjoy fashion magazines[br]and pretty things.

0:03:45.975,0:03:48.278
I watch "The Bachelor"[br]and romantic comedies,

0:03:48.302,0:03:51.409
and I have absurd fantasies[br]about fairy tales coming true.

0:03:52.121,0:03:54.445
Some of my transgressions[br]are more flagrant.

0:03:54.914,0:03:57.280
If a woman wants to take[br]her husband's name,

0:03:57.304,0:03:59.992
that is her choice, and it is not[br]my place to judge.

0:04:00.622,0:04:03.598
If a woman chooses to stay home[br]to raise her children,

0:04:03.622,0:04:05.713
I embrace that choice, too.

0:04:05.737,0:04:09.808
The problem is not that she makes herself[br]economically vulnerable in that choice;

0:04:09.832,0:04:12.002
the problem is that our society is set up[br]

0:04:12.002,0:04:14.982
to make women economically vulnerable[br]when they choose.

0:04:14.982,0:04:16.632
Let's deal with that.

0:04:17.601,0:04:20.979
(Applause)

0:04:23.413,0:04:25.484
I reject the mainstream feminism

0:04:25.508,0:04:28.135
that has historically ignored[br]or deflected the needs

0:04:28.159,0:04:32.547
of women of color, working-class women,[br]queer women and transgender women,

0:04:32.571,0:04:35.944
in favor of supporting white, middle-[br]and upper-class straight women.

0:04:35.968,0:04:39.624
Listen, if that's good feminism --[br]I am a very bad feminist.

0:04:39.648,0:04:40.738
(Laughter)

0:04:40.762,0:04:42.214
There is also this:

0:04:42.238,0:04:44.960
As a feminist, I feel a lot of pressure.

0:04:44.984,0:04:48.653
We have this tendency to put[br]visible feminists on a pedestal.

0:04:48.677,0:04:50.740
We expect them to pose perfectly.

0:04:51.287,0:04:52.447
When they disappoint us,

0:04:52.471,0:04:55.933
we gleefully knock them[br]from the very pedestal we put them on.

0:04:55.957,0:04:57.992
Like I said, I am a mess --

0:04:58.016,0:04:59.846
consider me knocked off that pedestal[br]

0:04:59.846,0:05:01.867
before you ever try to put me up there.

0:05:01.867,0:05:02.935
(Laughter)

0:05:03.374,0:05:04.434
Too many women,

0:05:04.458,0:05:07.483
particularly groundbreaking women[br]and industry leaders,

0:05:07.507,0:05:09.845
are afraid to be labeled as feminists.

0:05:09.869,0:05:13.575
They're afraid to stand up and say,[br]"Yes, I am a feminist,"

0:05:13.599,0:05:15.844
for fear of what that label means,

0:05:15.868,0:05:19.736
for fear of being unable to live up to[br]unrealistic expectations.

0:05:20.569,0:05:24.341
Take, for example, Beyoncé,[br]or as I call her, The Goddess.

0:05:24.365,0:05:26.301
(Laughter)

0:05:26.325,0:05:29.757
She has emerged, in recent years,[br]as a visible feminist.

0:05:29.781,0:05:32.598
At the 2014 MTV Video Music Awards,

0:05:32.622,0:05:36.388
she performed in front of the word[br]"feminist" 10 feet high.

0:05:36.412,0:05:38.643
It was a glorious spectacle to see[br]

0:05:38.643,0:05:41.643
this pop star openly embracing feminism

0:05:41.643,0:05:43.372
and letting young women and men know

0:05:43.396,0:05:46.499
that being a feminist[br]is something to celebrate.

0:05:46.985,0:05:50.644
As the moment faded, cultural critics[br]began endlessly debating

0:05:50.668,0:05:53.328
whether or not Beyoncé was,[br]indeed, a feminist.

0:05:53.693,0:05:55.574
They graded her feminism,

0:05:55.598,0:05:59.866
instead of simply taking a grown,[br]accomplished woman at her word.

0:05:59.890,0:06:02.528
(Laughter)

0:06:02.552,0:06:05.226
(Applause)

0:06:05.250,0:06:07.767
We demand perfection from feminists,

0:06:07.791,0:06:10.148
because we are still fighting for so much,

0:06:10.172,0:06:11.469
we want so much,

0:06:11.493,0:06:13.026
we need so damn much.

0:06:13.395,0:06:16.575
We go far beyond reasonable,[br]constructive criticism,

0:06:16.599,0:06:19.348
to dissecting any given woman's feminism,

0:06:19.372,0:06:21.753
tearing it apart[br]until there's nothing left.

0:06:22.253,0:06:23.642
We do not need to do that.

0:06:24.452,0:06:28.559
Bad feminism -- or really, more inclusive[br]feminism -- is a starting point.

0:06:28.583,0:06:30.036
But what happens next?

0:06:30.592,0:06:34.074
We go from acknowledging[br]our imperfections to accountability,

0:06:34.098,0:06:37.200
or walking the walk,[br]and being a little bit brave.

0:06:37.888,0:06:40.192
If I listen to degrading music,

0:06:40.216,0:06:43.742
I am creating a demand for which[br]artists are more than happy

0:06:43.742,0:06:45.676
to contribute a limitless supply.

0:06:46.120,0:06:48.000
These artists are not going to change[br]

0:06:48.000,0:06:49.955
how they talk about women in their songs

0:06:49.955,0:06:53.616
until we demand that change[br]by affecting their bottom line.

0:06:53.998,0:06:56.125
Certainly, it is difficult.

0:06:56.149,0:06:58.124
Why must it be so catchy?

0:06:58.561,0:07:01.317
(Laughter)

0:07:02.291,0:07:04.320
It's hard to make the better choice,

0:07:04.344,0:07:07.140
and it is so easy to justify a lesser one.

0:07:07.164,0:07:08.202
But --

0:07:08.226,0:07:09.981
when I justify bad choices,

0:07:10.005,0:07:12.924
I make it harder for women[br]to achieve equality,

0:07:12.948,0:07:14.812
the equality that we all deserve,

0:07:14.836,0:07:16.153
and I need to own that.

0:07:16.533,0:07:19.802
I think of my nieces, ages three and four.

0:07:19.826,0:07:22.265
They are gorgeous[br]and headstrong, brilliant girls,

0:07:22.289,0:07:23.863
who are a whole lot of brave.

0:07:24.284,0:07:27.201
I want them to thrive in a world[br]where they are valued

0:07:27.225,0:07:29.553
for the powerful creatures they are.

0:07:29.577,0:07:30.632
I think of them,

0:07:30.656,0:07:34.315
and suddenly, the better choice[br]becomes far easier to make.

0:07:34.775,0:07:36.865
We can all make better choices.

0:07:37.333,0:07:39.830
We can change the channel[br]when a television show

0:07:39.830,0:07:42.524
treats sexual violence[br]against women like sport,

0:07:42.548,0:07:43.976
Game of Thrones.

0:07:44.000,0:07:45.810
We can change the radio station

0:07:45.834,0:07:49.039
when we hear songs[br]that treat women as nothing.

0:07:49.063,0:07:51.746
We can spend our[br]box office dollars elsewhere

0:07:51.770,0:07:53.320
when movies don't treat women[br]

0:07:53.320,0:07:55.743
as anything more than decorative objects.

0:07:55.743,0:07:57.984
We can stop supporting professional sports

0:07:58.008,0:08:01.258
where the athletes treat [br]their partners like punching bags.

0:08:02.171,0:08:05.649
(Applause)

0:08:07.595,0:08:10.542
In other ways, men --[br]and especially straight white men --

0:08:10.566,0:08:13.653
can say, "No, I will not publish[br]with your magazine,

0:08:13.677,0:08:16.963
or participate in your project,[br]or otherwise work with you,

0:08:16.987,0:08:19.384
until you include a fair number of women,

0:08:19.408,0:08:21.955
both as participants and decision makers.

0:08:22.670,0:08:24.797
I won't work with you[br]until your publication,

0:08:24.821,0:08:28.582
or your organization, is more inclusive[br]of all kinds of difference."

0:08:29.225,0:08:31.518
Those of us who are underrepresented

0:08:31.542,0:08:33.711
and invited to participate[br]in such projects,

0:08:33.735,0:08:36.104
can also decline to be included

0:08:36.128,0:08:39.131
until more of us are invited[br]through the glass ceiling,

0:08:39.155,0:08:41.107
and we are tokens no more.

0:08:41.553,0:08:43.227
Without these efforts,

0:08:43.251,0:08:45.053
without taking these stands,

0:08:45.077,0:08:47.659
our accomplishments[br]are going to mean very little.

0:08:48.365,0:08:50.978
We can commit these small acts of bravery

0:08:51.002,0:08:54.905
and hope that our choices trickle[br]upward to the people in power --

0:08:54.929,0:08:57.540
editors, movie and music producers,

0:08:57.564,0:08:59.937
CEOs, lawmakers --

0:08:59.961,0:09:02.174
the people who can make[br]bigger, braver choices

0:09:02.198,0:09:04.979
to create lasting, meaningful change.

0:09:05.678,0:09:08.201
We can also boldly claim our feminism --

0:09:08.225,0:09:10.590
good, bad, or anywhere in between.

0:09:11.329,0:09:13.781
The last line of my book[br]"Bad Feminist" says,

0:09:13.805,0:09:17.724
"I would rather be a bad feminist[br]than no feminist at all."

0:09:18.240,0:09:20.280
This is true for so many reasons,

0:09:20.304,0:09:23.864
but first and foremost, I say this[br]because once upon a time,

0:09:23.888,0:09:25.717
my voice was stolen from me,

0:09:25.741,0:09:28.666
and feminism helped me[br]to get my voice back.

0:09:29.455,0:09:30.605
There was an incident.

0:09:30.915,0:09:34.335
I call it an incident so I can carry[br]the burden of what happened.

0:09:34.724,0:09:36.136
Some boys broke me,

0:09:36.136,0:09:37.950
when I was so young, I did not know[br]

0:09:37.950,0:09:40.400
what boys can do to break a girl.

0:09:40.400,0:09:42.542
They treated me like I was nothing.

0:09:42.566,0:09:45.040
I began to believe I was nothing.

0:09:45.064,0:09:47.103
They stole my voice, and in the after,

0:09:47.127,0:09:48.484
I did not dare to believe

0:09:48.508,0:09:50.924
that anything I might say could matter.

0:09:50.948,0:09:51.957
But --

0:09:51.981,0:09:53.353
I had writing.

0:09:53.377,0:09:55.813
And there, I wrote myself back together.

0:09:56.242,0:09:59.256
I wrote myself toward a stronger[br]version of myself.

0:09:59.653,0:10:01.004
I read the words of women

0:10:01.028,0:10:03.360
who might understand a story like mine,

0:10:03.384,0:10:05.155
and women who looked like me,

0:10:05.179,0:10:09.279
and understood what it was like to move[br]through the world with brown skin.

0:10:09.303,0:10:13.578
I read the words of women[br]who showed me I was not nothing.

0:10:13.602,0:10:15.284
I learned to write like them,

0:10:15.308,0:10:17.490
and then I learned to write as myself.

0:10:17.856,0:10:19.000
I found my voice again,

0:10:19.024,0:10:23.080
and I started to believe that my voice[br]is powerful beyond measure.

0:10:24.048,0:10:25.586
Through writing and feminism,

0:10:25.610,0:10:28.364
I also found that if I was[br]a little bit brave,

0:10:28.388,0:10:31.989
another woman might hear me[br]and see me and recognize

0:10:32.013,0:10:35.604
that none of us are the nothing[br]the world tries to tell us we are.

0:10:36.160,0:10:37.668
In one hand,

0:10:37.692,0:10:40.716
I hold the power to accomplish anything.

0:10:40.740,0:10:41.741
And in my other,

0:10:41.765,0:10:45.449
I hold the humbling reality[br]that I am just one woman.

0:10:45.918,0:10:47.597
I am a bad feminist,

0:10:47.621,0:10:49.263
I am a good woman,

0:10:49.287,0:10:51.662
I am trying to become better[br]in how I think,

0:10:51.686,0:10:53.946
and what I say, and what I do,

0:10:53.970,0:10:56.755
without abandoning everything[br]that makes me human.

0:10:57.152,0:10:59.676
I hope that we can all do the same.

0:10:59.700,0:11:01.943
I hope that we can all be[br]a little bit brave,

0:11:01.967,0:11:04.054
when we most need such bravery.

0:11:04.856,0:11:07.537
(Applause)