[beep]
[off-camera] Ace Ventura, The Matrix.
Are you familiar with the movie?
[Ace Ventura:] Yes.
It's a...
[grunts]
[beep]
[Clint Eastwood:] What the hell is a matrix?
[beep]
[Austin Powers:] Judo CHOP!
[beep]
[Alan Rickman:] I cannot shooow you the matrix.
I can only shooow you the dooor.
Yoou are the one who has to walk throough it.
[beep]
[Russel Brand:] Ah!
Woaah
Woaaah
Whoaaaah
Aaaahhh!
Dodged it!
Pew!
Neo! Free your mind!
Take this pill, free your mind!
[beep]
[Bam Margera:] Deja vu is u-usually a glitch in the matrix.
To obtain them, head d-down (?) to Mor-Morpus.
[off-camera] Morpheus.
Wait, am I Morpus or Neo?
[beep]
[Bear Grills:] I'm the one!
Though I have to make sure that I get out of this goo
and learn karate
[beep]
[Ben Affleck:] [muffled] Really...
[off-camera] Take 10!
[phone notification]
Eh, hold on a second.
I got a text.
You guys know Matt Damon?
- Yeah. - Yeah?
Yeah, he stole my script.
You take the red pill, you stay in maitherland (?)
Ben, is there something wrong with your jaw? You're...
My jaw?
Yeah, were you at the dentist today or something? You're kinda...
Nah, nah, nah
[beep]
[Colin Farrell:] What the heck is a matrix anyways?
Why do I gotta take these pills?
Try and free your mind, Neo.
None of this makes any sense.
You're telling me there's like another world
out there
It's not another world, it's a computer program.
For your brain.
For your mind.
Did you read the script?
Computer?
[beep]
[Jack Sparrow:] Mr. Anderson...
We've been looking for you, Mr. Anderson.
Grrraaarraarrraaa...
[beep]
[Jeff Goldblum:] Oh! Oh! Oh!
Ah! Mmm. Ah.
Oh! Oh! Oh!
Ah! Ah!
Um, I can, I can move out of the way
of bullets! Yes. Yes.
[beep]
[Joey Tribbiani:] You wanna take the blue pill?
Probably gonna end up doin' whatever you wanna do.
I don't know.
You wanna take the red pill,
you gonna trip out. Trust me.
It's worth it.
See that girl in the red dress?
Go ask how she's doin'.
[beep]
[husky breath ;)]
[Leonardo DiCaprio:] Phone me.
Into the dream world -
out of the dream world.
It's the matrix.
There's all these dreams.
Whohaaa...
[the rustle of falling paper]
[beep]
[Mark Wahlberg:] The other guys are gonna come get you,
they're gonna find you,
and then you're gonna be dead!
This is so confusing!
How can I be the one?!
I'm just a regular old son of a gun!
I'm a computer hacker!
How can I be the one?!
Gosh, this is more confusing than I Heart Huckabees!
[beep]
You can take your hands out of your pockets if you want to, Ryan.
[Ryan Gosling:] No, I'm good.
Morpheus, you really think I'm the one
Ryan, do you mind speaking up a little bit?
We can't quite hear you with that toothpick in your mouth.
Morpheus, you really think I'm the one
[beep]
[off-camera] Orlando Blonde for The Matrix.
[Orlando Bloom:] Orlando Blonde!?
I'm Orlando Bloom!
Like a flower?
NO!
NOT LIKE A FLOWER!
WELL yes.
Aren't you Johnny Depp's kid?
Johnny Depp's kid!?
Yeah.
I'll have you know that I starred alongside Johnny Depp in a -
A LOT OF FILM!
HE'S NOT MY DAD!
What are you talking about, father and son!?
You and Johnny Depp! You and Johnny Depp -
JOHNNY DEPP IS NOT MY FATHER!
NO!
I'M NOT RELATED TO HIM IN ANY WAY!
What are you trying to tell me!?
That I can dodge bullets!?
How can I dodge bullets!?
That's impossible, MORPHEUS!
[Adam Sandler:] Mommy -
mommy said that -
mommy said that you were -
mommy said that you were the one,
Neo, so -