[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:21.20,0:00:22.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Hello!
Dialogue: 0,0:00:23.22,0:00:25.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, good. No one's started drinking yet.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:25.09,0:00:27.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Everyone's feeling kind of perky \Nand excited.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:27.73,0:00:29.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Good, for I hope you'll remember \Nwhat we talk about,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:29.88,0:00:31.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,at least up to this point.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:31.14,0:00:33.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,After that, you're on your own.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:33.69,0:00:36.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When I was about sixteen years old,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:36.53,0:00:38.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can remember \Nflipping through channels at home,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:38.82,0:00:40.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,during summer vacation,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:40.30,0:00:42.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,looking for a movie to watch on HBO.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:42.67,0:00:45.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And how many of you remember \NFerris Bueller's Day Off?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:45.86,0:00:47.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Oh, yeah. Great movie, right?
Dialogue: 0,0:00:47.53,0:00:49.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Well, I saw Matthew Broderick \Non the screen,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:49.53,0:00:51.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and so I thought, "Sweet!
Dialogue: 0,0:00:51.13,0:00:53.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ferris Bueller. I'll watch this!"
Dialogue: 0,0:00:53.67,0:00:56.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It wasn't Ferris Bueller. \NAnd forgive me, Matthew Broderick.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:56.41,0:00:58.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know you've done other movies \Nbesides Ferris Bueller,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:58.63,0:01:00.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but that's how I remember you. \NYou're Ferris.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:00.56,0:01:02.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But you weren't doing \N"Ferrisy" things at the time.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:02.81,0:01:06.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You were doing gay things at the time.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:06.29,0:01:09.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He was in a movie \Ncalled Torch Song Trilogy.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:09.59,0:01:12.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And Torch Song Trilogy \Nwas based on a play
Dialogue: 0,0:01:12.19,0:01:14.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about this drag queen,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:14.14,0:01:16.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who, essentially, was looking for love.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:16.46,0:01:17.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Love and respect.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:17.68,0:01:19.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's what the whole film was about.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:19.79,0:01:21.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And, as I'm watching it, I'm realizing
Dialogue: 0,0:01:21.60,0:01:24.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that they're talking about me.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:24.40,0:01:25.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not the drag queen part.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:25.80,0:01:28.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm not shaving my hair for anyone.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:28.36,0:01:31.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But the gay part, \Nthe friendly love and respect,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:31.67,0:01:35.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the part about trying to find \Nyour place in the world.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:35.52,0:01:37.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, as I'm watching this,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:37.75,0:01:41.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I see this powerful scene \Nthat brought me to tears,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:41.93,0:01:45.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and it's stuck with me \Nfor the past 25 years.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:45.42,0:01:48.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it's this quote \Nthat the main character, Arnold,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:48.81,0:01:50.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,tells his mother,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:50.38,0:01:52.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as they're fighting about who he is
Dialogue: 0,0:01:52.97,0:01:55.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the life that he lives:
Dialogue: 0,0:01:56.57,0:02:00.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"There's one more thing \Nyou'd better understand.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:00.91,0:02:03.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have taught myself to sew,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:03.95,0:02:06.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,cook, fix plumbing, build furniture.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:06.66,0:02:09.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I can even pat myself on the back, \Nwhen necessary.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:09.97,0:02:14.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Also, I don't have \Nto ask anyone for anything.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:14.15,0:02:15.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's nothing I need from anyone,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:15.74,0:02:19.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,except for love and respect,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:19.34,0:02:21.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and anyone who can't give me \Nthose two things
Dialogue: 0,0:02:21.48,0:02:24.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,has no place in my life."
Dialogue: 0,0:02:24.47,0:02:28.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I remember that scene \Nlike it was yesterday.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:28.52,0:02:30.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was sixteen, I was in tears,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:30.59,0:02:32.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was in the closet
Dialogue: 0,0:02:32.21,0:02:34.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I'm looking at these two people,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:34.18,0:02:37.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Ferris Bueller and some guy \NI'd never seen before,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:37.08,0:02:38.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:02:38.26,0:02:40.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,fighting for love.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:42.90,0:02:45.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When I finally got to a place in my life
Dialogue: 0,0:02:45.15,0:02:47.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where I came out and accepted who I was
Dialogue: 0,0:02:47.36,0:02:49.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,-- and was really quite happy, \Nto tell you the truth,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:49.18,0:02:51.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was happily gay \Nand I guess that's supposed to be right,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:51.69,0:02:54.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because "gay" means "happy" too --,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:55.12,0:02:57.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I realized that a lot of people \Nweren't as gay as I was,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:57.61,0:02:59.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"gay" being "happy", not "gay" being
Dialogue: 0,0:02:59.10,0:03:00.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,attracted to the same sex.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:00.72,0:03:01.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:03:01.93,0:03:04.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In fact, I heard \Nthat there was a lot of hate
Dialogue: 0,0:03:04.63,0:03:07.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and a lot of anger \Nand a lot of frustration
Dialogue: 0,0:03:07.21,0:03:10.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and a lot of fear about who I was
Dialogue: 0,0:03:10.81,0:03:13.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the gay lifestyle.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:13.90,0:03:16.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, I'm sitting here \Ntrying to figure out,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:16.10,0:03:17.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"the gay lifestyle", "the gay lifestyle".
Dialogue: 0,0:03:17.82,0:03:20.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I keep hearing this word \Nover and over and over again,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:20.41,0:03:22.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"lifestyle", "lifestyle", lifestyle".
Dialogue: 0,0:03:22.40,0:03:23.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've even heard a politicians say
Dialogue: 0,0:03:23.98,0:03:26.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that the gay lifestyle is a greater threat
Dialogue: 0,0:03:26.72,0:03:29.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to civilization than terrorism.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:30.24,0:03:32.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's when I got scared!
Dialogue: 0,0:03:32.09,0:03:33.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:03:33.35,0:03:35.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because I'm thinking,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:35.00,0:03:36.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"If I'm gay,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:36.62,0:03:39.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I'm doing something \Nthat's going to destroy civilization,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:39.97,0:03:41.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I need to figure out what this stuff is
Dialogue: 0,0:03:41.95,0:03:43.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I need to stop doing it right now!"
Dialogue: 0,0:03:43.93,0:03:46.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:03:46.78,0:03:49.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, I took a look at my life,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:49.51,0:03:52.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a hard look at my life,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:52.17,0:03:55.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I saw some things very disturbing.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:55.58,0:03:59.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[The Super-Duper Evil Gay Lifestyle] \N(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:03:59.79,0:04:01.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I want to begin sharing \Nthese evil things
Dialogue: 0,0:04:01.63,0:04:03.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that I've been doing with you,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:03.32,0:04:05.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,starting with my mornings.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:05.67,0:04:06.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:06.88,0:04:09.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I drink coffee.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:09.29,0:04:10.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not only do I drink coffee,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:10.60,0:04:13.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I know other gay people who drink coffee.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:13.20,0:04:14.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:15.71,0:04:18.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I get stuck in traffic.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:18.79,0:04:21.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Evil, evil traffic!
Dialogue: 0,0:04:22.10,0:04:25.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Sometimes I get stuck \Nin lines at airports!
Dialogue: 0,0:04:25.57,0:04:26.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I look around and I go, "My God!
Dialogue: 0,0:04:26.99,0:04:28.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Look at all these gay people!
Dialogue: 0,0:04:28.21,0:04:30.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're all trapped in these lines,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:30.08,0:04:32.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,these long lines, \Ntrying to get into the airplane!
Dialogue: 0,0:04:32.77,0:04:34.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,My God! This lifestyle that I'm living
Dialogue: 0,0:04:34.56,0:04:37.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is so freaking evil!"
Dialogue: 0,0:04:37.37,0:04:38.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:38.81,0:04:40.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I clean up.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:40.50,0:04:43.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is not an actual photograph \Nof my son's room.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:43.50,0:04:45.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,His is messier.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:45.09,0:04:46.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:46.96,0:04:48.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And, because I have a fifteen-year-old,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:48.56,0:04:51.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,all I do is cook, and cook, and cook.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:51.78,0:04:54.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Any parents out there of teenagers?
Dialogue: 0,0:04:54.13,0:04:56.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All we do is cook for these people!
Dialogue: 0,0:04:56.30,0:04:59.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,They eat two, three, four dinners a night!
Dialogue: 0,0:04:59.64,0:05:01.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's ridiculous! (Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:01.62,0:05:04.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is the gay lifestyle.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:04.89,0:05:06.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And after I'm done cooking,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:06.40,0:05:08.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and cleaning, and standing in line,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:08.85,0:05:11.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and getting stuck in traffic,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:11.64,0:05:14.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,my partner and I, we get together
Dialogue: 0,0:05:14.93,0:05:16.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and we decide that we're going to go
Dialogue: 0,0:05:16.81,0:05:20.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and have some wild and crazy fun.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:20.81,0:05:22.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:24.30,0:05:28.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We're used to be in bed before we find out\Nwho's eliminated on American Idol.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:28.02,0:05:29.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:29.15,0:05:31.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We have to wake up \Nand find out the next day
Dialogue: 0,0:05:31.33,0:05:35.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who's still on, \Nbecause we're too freaking tired
Dialogue: 0,0:05:35.21,0:05:37.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to hear who stays on.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:37.24,0:05:42.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is the super-duper, \Nevil gay lifestyle. (Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:42.04,0:05:44.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Run for your heterosexual lives, people!
Dialogue: 0,0:05:44.73,0:05:46.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:46.55,0:05:51.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:54.32,0:05:58.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When my partner Steve and I \Nfirst started dating,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:58.86,0:06:02.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,he told me the story about penguins.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:02.45,0:06:05.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I didn't know \Nwhere he was going with it at first.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:05.59,0:06:08.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He was kind of a little bit nervous \Nwhen he was sharing it with me.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:08.29,0:06:11.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But he told me that, \Nwhen a penguin finds a mate
Dialogue: 0,0:06:11.00,0:06:13.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that they want to spend \Nthe rest of their life with,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:13.96,0:06:15.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,they present them with a pebble.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:15.76,0:06:18.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The perfect pebble.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:18.16,0:06:19.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then he reaches into his pocket
Dialogue: 0,0:06:19.91,0:06:22.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he brings this out to me.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:24.00,0:06:26.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I looked at it and I was like,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:26.12,0:06:28.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"This is really cool."
Dialogue: 0,0:06:28.48,0:06:32.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And he says, "I want to spend \Nthe rest of my life with you."
Dialogue: 0,0:06:33.21,0:06:36.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, I wear this \Nwhenever I have to do something
Dialogue: 0,0:06:36.40,0:06:38.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that makes me a little nervous,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:38.21,0:06:41.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,like, I don't know, a TEDx talk. (Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:06:41.80,0:06:43.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wear this when I am apart from him
Dialogue: 0,0:06:43.77,0:06:45.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for a long period of time,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:45.81,0:06:48.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and sometimes \NI just wear it just because.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:49.57,0:06:52.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How many people out there are in love?
Dialogue: 0,0:06:52.02,0:06:54.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Anyone in love out there?
Dialogue: 0,0:06:55.24,0:06:56.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You might be gay.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:56.95,0:06:59.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:06:59.18,0:07:01.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Because I too am in love
Dialogue: 0,0:07:01.11,0:07:03.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and, apparently, \Nthat's part of the gay lifestyle
Dialogue: 0,0:07:03.38,0:07:05.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I warned you about. (Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:07:05.98,0:07:10.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:07:11.54,0:07:14.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You may want to tell your spouse,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:14.22,0:07:17.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who, if they're in love, \Nmight be gay as well.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:17.30,0:07:19.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,How many of you are single?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:19.50,0:07:20.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Any single people out there?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:20.86,0:07:22.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You too might be gay,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:22.90,0:07:26.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because I know some gay people \Nwho are also single.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:26.38,0:07:28.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's really scary, this gay lifestyle thing.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:28.58,0:07:30.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's super-duper evil
Dialogue: 0,0:07:30.27,0:07:32.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and there's no end to it.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:32.78,0:07:36.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It goes and goes and engulfs [us].
Dialogue: 0,0:07:36.62,0:07:38.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's really quite silly, isn't it?
Dialogue: 0,0:07:38.82,0:07:40.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's why I'm so happy
Dialogue: 0,0:07:40.75,0:07:44.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to finally hear President Obama \Ncome out and say...
Dialogue: 0,0:07:44.59,0:07:49.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause) (Cheering)
Dialogue: 0,0:07:52.25,0:07:56.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that he supports marriage equality.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:56.00,0:07:58.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's a wonderful day \Nin our country's history,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:58.03,0:08:00.44,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's a wonderful day \Nin the globe's history
Dialogue: 0,0:08:00.44,0:08:02.100,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to be able to have \Nan actual sitting president
Dialogue: 0,0:08:02.100,0:08:05.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,say "Enough of this",
Dialogue: 0,0:08:05.06,0:08:08.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,first to himself and then \Nto the rest of the world.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:08.64,0:08:10.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's wonderful.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:11.12,0:08:12.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But there's something \Nthat's been disturbing me
Dialogue: 0,0:08:12.94,0:08:18.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,since he made that remark \Njust a short time ago.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:18.04,0:08:21.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that is, apparently, \Nthis is just another move
Dialogue: 0,0:08:21.97,0:08:26.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by the gay activists that's \Non the "Gay Agenda".
Dialogue: 0,0:08:27.98,0:08:29.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I'm disturbed by this
Dialogue: 0,0:08:29.42,0:08:33.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because I have been openly gay now \Nfor quite some time.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:33.90,0:08:35.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've been to all of the functions.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:35.92,0:08:37.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've been to fundraisers,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:37.28,0:08:38.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've written about the topic
Dialogue: 0,0:08:38.57,0:08:41.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I have yet to receive \Nmy copy of this "Gay Agenda".
Dialogue: 0,0:08:41.77,0:08:44.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:08:44.13,0:08:45.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've paid my dues on time...
Dialogue: 0,0:08:45.94,0:08:48.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:08:49.43,0:08:51.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've marched in gay pride flags,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:51.46,0:08:53.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,parades and the whole nine,
Dialogue: 0,0:08:53.19,0:08:56.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I have yet to see \Na copy of the "Gay Agenda".
Dialogue: 0,0:08:56.26,0:08:57.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was very, very frustrated.
Dialogue: 0,0:08:57.68,0:09:01.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was feeling left out \Nlike I wasn't quite gay enough.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:01.38,0:09:03.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But then, something wonderful happened.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:03.92,0:09:06.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was out shopping, as I tend to do,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:06.99,0:09:11.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I came across a booklet copy
Dialogue: 0,0:09:11.05,0:09:14.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of the official Gay Agenda.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:15.43,0:09:18.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I said to myself, "LZ, for so long,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:18.40,0:09:20.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you have been denied this.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:20.86,0:09:22.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When you get in front of this crowd,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:22.86,0:09:25.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you're going to share the news,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:25.58,0:09:27.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you're going to spread the Gay Agenda,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:27.54,0:09:29.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so no one else has to wonder,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:29.25,0:09:33.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'What exactly is in the Gay Agenda?'
Dialogue: 0,0:09:33.19,0:09:36.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'What are these gays up to?' (Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:09:36.14,0:09:38.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,'What do they want?'"
Dialogue: 0,0:09:39.35,0:09:42.57,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, without further ado,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:42.57,0:09:44.48,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I will present to you, ladies and gentlemen,
Dialogue: 0,0:09:44.48,0:09:47.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,-- and be careful, because it's evil --
Dialogue: 0,0:09:47.40,0:09:53.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a copy, the official copy \Nof the Gay Agenda.
Dialogue: 0,0:09:57.01,0:10:02.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Gay Agenda] \N(Music)
Dialogue: 0,0:10:41.86,0:10:43.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Gay Agenda, people!
Dialogue: 0,0:10:43.78,0:10:48.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause) (Cheering)
Dialogue: 0,0:10:48.96,0:10:53.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There it is. Did you soak it all in?
Dialogue: 0,0:10:53.16,0:10:54.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Gay Agenda!
Dialogue: 0,0:10:54.86,0:10:56.99,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Some of you may be calling it
Dialogue: 0,0:10:58.00,0:10:59.65,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"The Constitution of the United States"?
Dialogue: 0,0:10:59.65,0:11:01.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is that what you call it too?
Dialogue: 0,0:11:01.41,0:11:06.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The US Constitution is the Gay Agenda.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:06.20,0:11:09.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,These gays, people like me,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:09.02,0:11:11.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,want to be treated like full citizens.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:11.23,0:11:15.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it's all written down! In plain sight!
Dialogue: 0,0:11:15.18,0:11:17.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was blown away when I saw it!
Dialogue: 0,0:11:17.16,0:11:20.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was like, "Wait! Is this the Gay Agenda?
Dialogue: 0,0:11:20.86,0:11:22.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Why didn't you just call it \N"The Constitution",
Dialogue: 0,0:11:22.41,0:11:24.84,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so I knew what you were talking about?
Dialogue: 0,0:11:24.84,0:11:29.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wouldn't have been so confused! \NI wouldn't have been so upset!"
Dialogue: 0,0:11:29.01,0:11:33.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But... there it is! The Gay Agenda.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:33.62,0:11:35.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Run for your heterosexual lives.
Dialogue: 0,0:11:35.89,0:11:37.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:11:39.14,0:11:42.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Did you know that in all the states
Dialogue: 0,0:11:42.46,0:11:44.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,where there is no shading,
Dialogue: 0,0:11:44.77,0:11:49.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,people who are gay, lesbian, \Nbisexual or transgendered
Dialogue: 0,0:11:49.30,0:11:51.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,can be kicked out \Nof their apartments for being
Dialogue: 0,0:11:51.55,0:11:55.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered?
Dialogue: 0,0:11:56.30,0:11:59.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's the only reason \Nthat a landlord needs
Dialogue: 0,0:11:59.02,0:12:00.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to have them removed,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:00.36,0:12:02.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because there's no protection
Dialogue: 0,0:12:02.24,0:12:06.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from discrimination of GLBT people.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:07.69,0:12:10.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Did you know, in the states \Nwhere there is no shading,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:10.92,0:12:12.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that you can be fired
Dialogue: 0,0:12:12.96,0:12:17.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for being gay, lesbian, \Nbisexual or transgendered,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:17.42,0:12:21.75,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not based upon the quality of your work,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:21.75,0:12:23.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,how long you've been there,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:23.58,0:12:25.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,if you stink?
Dialogue: 0,0:12:25.74,0:12:31.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Just if you're gay, lesbian, \Nbisexual or transgendered.
Dialogue: 0,0:12:32.55,0:12:37.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All of which flies in the face \Nof the Gay Agenda,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:37.69,0:12:41.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,also known as the US Constitution,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:41.24,0:12:45.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,specifically this \Nlittle Amendment right here:
Dialogue: 0,0:12:45.32,0:12:47.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"No state shall make or enforce any law
Dialogue: 0,0:12:47.94,0:12:50.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which shall abridge \Nthe privileges or immunities
Dialogue: 0,0:12:50.32,0:12:54.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of citizens of the United States."
Dialogue: 0,0:12:54.91,0:12:57.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I'm looking at you, North Carolina,
Dialogue: 0,0:12:57.88,0:13:00.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but you are not looking \Nat the US Constitution.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:02.69,0:13:06.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is the Gay Agenda, equality.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:06.04,0:13:07.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Not special rights,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:07.68,0:13:10.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but the rights that have been \Nalready written
Dialogue: 0,0:13:10.50,0:13:11.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,by these people,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:11.86,0:13:14.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,these elitists, if you will.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:14.64,0:13:18.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Educated, well dressed...
Dialogue: 0,0:13:18.09,0:13:20.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:13:20.45,0:13:23.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Some would dare say \N"Questionably dressed"...
Dialogue: 0,0:13:23.56,0:13:25.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:13:26.38,0:13:30.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Nonetheless, our forefathers, right?
Dialogue: 0,0:13:30.38,0:13:33.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The people that, we say, \Nknew what they were doing
Dialogue: 0,0:13:33.12,0:13:34.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when they wrote the Constitution,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:34.61,0:13:37.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the Gay Agenda, if you will.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:37.15,0:13:41.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,All of that flies on the face \Nof what they did.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:43.99,0:13:46.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That is the reason why
Dialogue: 0,0:13:46.27,0:13:48.13,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I felt it was imperative
Dialogue: 0,0:13:48.13,0:13:50.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that I presented you
Dialogue: 0,0:13:50.42,0:13:53.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,with this copy of the Gay Agenda,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:53.67,0:13:56.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because I figured if I made it funny,
Dialogue: 0,0:13:56.55,0:13:58.64,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you wouldn't be as threatened.
Dialogue: 0,0:13:58.64,0:14:00.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I figured if I was a bit irreverent,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:00.80,0:14:03.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you wouldn't find it serious.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:03.21,0:14:05.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But when you see the map
Dialogue: 0,0:14:05.82,0:14:09.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and you see our state of Michigan,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:09.73,0:14:14.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's legal to fire someone
Dialogue: 0,0:14:14.22,0:14:18.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for being gay, lesbian, \Nbisexual or transgendered.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:18.05,0:14:22.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's legal to remove someone \Nfrom their home
Dialogue: 0,0:14:22.83,0:14:27.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because they're gay, lesbian, \Nbisexual or transgendered.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:27.33,0:14:29.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But you'll realize \Nthat this whole conversation
Dialogue: 0,0:14:29.34,0:14:31.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,about marriage equality
Dialogue: 0,0:14:31.17,0:14:34.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is not about stripping \Nsomeone's rights away.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:34.60,0:14:36.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's about granting them the rights
Dialogue: 0,0:14:36.23,0:14:39.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that have already been stated.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:39.24,0:14:41.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And we're just trying \Nto walk in those rights
Dialogue: 0,0:14:41.69,0:14:44.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that have already been stated,
Dialogue: 0,0:14:44.14,0:14:47.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that we have already agreed upon.
Dialogue: 0,0:14:47.72,0:14:52.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There are people living in fear
Dialogue: 0,0:14:53.26,0:14:56.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of losing their jobs!
Dialogue: 0,0:14:56.98,0:15:00.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, they don't show anyone \Nwho they really are!
Dialogue: 0,0:15:02.03,0:15:04.11,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Right here, at home.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:04.11,0:15:05.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This isn't just about North Carolina.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:05.94,0:15:09.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In all those states that were clear
Dialogue: 0,0:15:09.78,0:15:11.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,it's legal.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:12.54,0:15:15.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If I could brag for a second,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:15.39,0:15:18.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I have a fifteen-year-old son,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:18.77,0:15:21.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,from my marriage.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:21.47,0:15:24.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He has a 4.0.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:24.16,0:15:27.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He is starting a new club at school,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:27.55,0:15:30.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Policy Debate".
Dialogue: 0,0:15:31.52,0:15:34.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He is a budding track star.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:34.37,0:15:38.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He has almost every single record \Nin middle school
Dialogue: 0,0:15:38.28,0:15:41.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,for every event that he competed in.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:41.32,0:15:43.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He volunteers.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:43.72,0:15:46.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,He prays before he eats.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:47.96,0:15:50.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I would like to think, as his father,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:50.74,0:15:53.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and he lives with me primarily,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:53.72,0:15:56.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that I have a little something \Nto do with all of that.
Dialogue: 0,0:15:56.94,0:15:59.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I would like to think \Nthat he's a good boy,
Dialogue: 0,0:15:59.42,0:16:02.30,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a respectful young man.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:02.30,0:16:05.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I would like to think that I've proven
Dialogue: 0,0:16:05.15,0:16:07.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to be a capable father.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:08.21,0:16:12.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But if I were to go \Nto the state of Michigan today
Dialogue: 0,0:16:12.15,0:16:14.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and try to adopt a young person
Dialogue: 0,0:16:14.71,0:16:16.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who is in an orphanage,
Dialogue: 0,0:16:16.10,0:16:19.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I would be disqualified \Nfor only one reason:
Dialogue: 0,0:16:20.62,0:16:22.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because I'm gay.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:23.34,0:16:25.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It doesn't matter \Nwhat I've already proven,
Dialogue: 0,0:16:25.49,0:16:28.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,what I can do with my heart.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:28.47,0:16:31.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's because of what the state \Nof Michigan says that I am
Dialogue: 0,0:16:31.56,0:16:36.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that I am disqualified \Nfor any sort of adoption.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:39.02,0:16:41.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that's not just about me.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:41.83,0:16:47.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That's about so many \Nother Michiganders, US citizens,
Dialogue: 0,0:16:47.02,0:16:51.96,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,who don't understand why what they are
Dialogue: 0,0:16:51.96,0:16:56.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,is so much more significant \Nthan who they are.
Dialogue: 0,0:16:58.41,0:17:00.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This story just keeps playing \N
Dialogue: 0,0:17:00.82,0:17:05.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,over and over and over again \Nin our country's history.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:06.39,0:17:09.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There was a time in which, I don't know,
Dialogue: 0,0:17:09.69,0:17:13.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,people who were black \Ncouldn't have the same rights.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:14.17,0:17:16.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,People who happened to be women
Dialogue: 0,0:17:16.03,0:17:18.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,didn't have the same rights: \Nthey couldn't vote!
Dialogue: 0,0:17:19.73,0:17:21.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There was a point in our history
Dialogue: 0,0:17:21.07,0:17:23.74,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in which, if you were \Nconsidered disabled,
Dialogue: 0,0:17:23.74,0:17:25.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,then an employer could just fire you,
Dialogue: 0,0:17:25.46,0:17:28.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,before the \NAmerica's With Disabilities Act.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:29.33,0:17:32.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We keep doing this over and over again!
Dialogue: 0,0:17:32.00,0:17:34.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And so, here we are,
Dialogue: 0,0:17:34.40,0:17:36.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,2012,
Dialogue: 0,0:17:36.91,0:17:38.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Gay Agenda,
Dialogue: 0,0:17:38.95,0:17:40.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,gay lifestyle,
Dialogue: 0,0:17:40.77,0:17:42.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I'm not a good dad,
Dialogue: 0,0:17:42.98,0:17:45.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and people don't deserve \Nto be able to protect their families,
Dialogue: 0,0:17:45.98,0:17:48.07,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,because of what they are,
Dialogue: 0,0:17:48.07,0:17:50.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,not who they are.
Dialogue: 0,0:17:51.67,0:17:53.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, when you hear the words \N
Dialogue: 0,0:17:53.60,0:17:57.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"gay lifestyle" and "Gay Agenda" \Nin the future,
Dialogue: 0,0:17:57.82,0:18:00.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I encourage you to do two things.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:00.97,0:18:04.93,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,One: remember the US Constitution.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:05.77,0:18:08.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And then, two: if you wouldn't mind
Dialogue: 0,0:18:08.26,0:18:11.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,looking to your left, please.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:12.97,0:18:15.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Look to your right.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:16.66,0:18:21.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That person next to you \Nis a brother, is a sister,
Dialogue: 0,0:18:21.32,0:18:23.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and they should be treated \Nwith love and respect.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:23.49,0:18:25.10,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thank you.
Dialogue: 0,0:18:25.10,0:18:27.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Applause)