WEBVTT

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And so the other thing,
that was about the age of 11 or 12,

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I discovered what running meant to me.

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And it isn't about the physicalness of it,
or what it does for our bodies,

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or the cardiovascular functioning.

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What it did was give me
sanctuary and solitude

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and a place to connect with light divine.

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It's where I find clarity,
and I still find it there.

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So the other thing that happened
about the age of 15

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was I come from a long lineage,

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like if we had my whole chart
up here of my family,

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you'd see a lot
of very thin athletic people.

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You'd also see
a lot of really good drinkers.

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And so at age 15, I took my first drink.

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That was at my friend Beth's house,
and after several, you know, of those,

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I called this guy named Robbie.

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And he went
to like the heathen public school,

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and I told Robbie that I loved him.

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(Laughter)

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And Robbie didn't know who I was

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(Laughter)

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but by the end of the conversation
with him, he did know who I was,

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and so did all of his buddies.

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And there was something
incredibly powerful about that.

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It's like those cultural
messages that said,

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"A quick fix and a quick way
to feeling good about yourself will work."

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And what I didn't realize at the time
was that it was part of the plan,

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it was part of the lie,
part of the way to dim, you know,

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dim the miraculous spirit
that was me, and you, and all of us.

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And so these two worlds
began to build momentum.

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And step by step, the running improved,
and I began to get competitive at it,

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because you can't just run because,
you have to run for a reason.

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You have to run to compete,
you have to run to achieve.

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You can't just run because.

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And so too did the drinking,

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in the dark nights,
and in a lot of really dark spaces.

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And so, on July 6, 1993,
I was 32 years old, I hit bottom.

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The running was no longer working,

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and I could not find solitude
or sanctuary in that space;

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I couldn't find it anywhere.

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And so I called my big sister Emily,
and I told her I had two choices.

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I was either going to move to California,
which is like the "geographic cure",

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or I was going to kill myself.

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And I asked my sister Emily,

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"Which one should I pick?"

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And she paused,

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and then she gave me the greatest advice
of anything I've ever received,

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and I'd heard it before,
but it really worked.

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And she said,
"Molly, this too shall pass."

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And so I hung up the phone,
and I sort of fell to the side,

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and I went to sleep.

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The next day was July 7, 1993,

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and I decided later on in the day,
I called in sick to the job

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that I was holding at the time,
and I decided to go for a run.

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And there was this huge thunderstorm
brewing off in the distance,

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massive clouds, electricity, and lighting,
and all sorts of just ions in the air.

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And so I put on my running clothes,
and I remembering thinking,

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"It's too dangerous. Don't go, don't go!"

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And in among all the noises,
of all the shoulds, and oughts,

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and "You're not good enough,
or pretty enough, or thin enough,

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or whatever enough,"

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came this one little voice.

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And this voice said,
"If you need to go, go."

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So I remember descending those stairs,

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and about five miles into
what ended up being a 6-mile run,

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something happened.

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And you know, for me to try to frame it
in words does it a disservice.

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But there was something that happened,

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it was like the way the sweat
came out of my pores

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and trickled down my chest
and down my back,

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and the weight of my ponytail
as it tugged behind me.

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And there was this spot

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at the intersection
of Kennelworth and East Boulevard,

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where I just felt nothing.

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It was as if there was no story,
there was no should, there was no ought,

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there was nothing.

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It was as if I was just invisible,
but in the most glorious way.

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The story disappeared,

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the whatever I should be
was no longer there; and I just was.

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And so, I burst into tears,
and I walked home.

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And I knew
that once I had experienced that,

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I couldn't go back,

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I couldn't go back
to living the way that I had lived.

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That, you know, something had changed,
and I couldn't articulate what it was,

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but I knew that it had changed,
and I didn't know what to do.

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So I just let it sit,
and let it marinate for awhile.

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And then I got married,
and then I had a child,

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and when I gave birth to my son,

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it was like, the purpose,
what I was here for,

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began to reveal itself in the quiet times
as I would nurse him.

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And so "Girls on the Run",
this thing that I wanted to do,

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something to help girls feel and know
that they are safe to be themselves,

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no matter what our culture,
or no matter what their context is,

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no matter how they see it,

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they are safe, and beautiful,
and whole just the way they are.

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And so I wrote out this curriculum,

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and I went to the school
where I had my spell,

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and I'll never forget going to meet
with the after-school coordinator,

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and said, "Alright, I'd like to do
this thing called 'Girls on the Run'."

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And his response, and he's
a good friend of mine still, he said,

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"Aww, that sounds cute."

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(Laughter)

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And I can remember thinking, "Cute?!

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This is going to be a species-level,
transformational shift

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in the way girls and women
perceive themselves!

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Like, were going to obliterate sexism
and eliminate the objectification of women

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from across the globe!"

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You know, I mean I really had
that thought in my head,

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and yet, I couldn't have said it then,
I still have-- I enjoy saying it now.

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(Laughter)

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But I couldn't said it then,
and so what do you do?

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You go right back to default mode
which felt a lot safer,

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so I probably did
a little something like this,

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"Well it is. Can we do it?"

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(Laughter)

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He said yes.

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And so, 13 girls arrived
the following month.

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And I'll tell you right now,
that if you are at all ever questioning

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what it is that you're supposed to do
or where you're supposed to land,

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I felt like this, when those girls came.

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That's exactly the way that it felt.

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And if you ever question or wonder
what it is you're supposed to do,

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if it makes you go like that,

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you're probably supposed to do it.

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And so, the program has since grown,

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13 little girls
pulled 13 other little girls,

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and then we had 26,
and then there were 75,

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and it's just been an amazing thing
for me to realize that so many of us,

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whether we're third grade, or 70,
or male, or female,

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or old, or young,
or left-brained, or right-brained,

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we just want to know that we are loved.

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And so the program is now
in 174 cities across North America.

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And there were--

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(Applause)

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Last year, we served,

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we reached the quarter million mark
in the number of girls served.

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And at this point, I'm feeling very called
to expand to other nations,

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and we have 40 or so
that have expressed an interest,

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not quite sure what to do with that yet,
from a business standpoint.

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But what I'd like to do
just to launch and to get you thinking

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is to share with you
one story about a very special girl.

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And her name is Shakira.

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And so I was coaching
a group of little girls,

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this was several years ago,
and we limit it to 15 girls in a group.

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And at this point I had 14,
and we start the day, the first activity

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where you say your name
and an adjective that describes you.

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And so I'm always like "Miraculous Molly",
and we go around the circle,

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and we got around to this one little girl

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who just shook her head
and looked to the ground.

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And one of the other girls goes,
"Oh that's just Shakira, she never talks."

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And I was like, "Alright girl,
I'm just glad you're here.

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You just keep coming back girl,
just keep coming back."

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And so, the next lesson she comes,
and she doesn't speak,

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and the third lesson she comes,
and she doesn't speak,

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and the fourth lesson she comes,
and she doesn't speak.

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So I went to the school counselor,
and I said, "Can you please help me?

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I don't know
how to reach this little girl."

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And she said to me, "Well Molly...

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if you look closely
about her calves and her thighs,

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you'll see the scars
from the cigarette burns."

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And this little girl had been cast away
in closets for long points of time.

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So she had to wear glasses
that would dim in the sunlight.

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And I realized at that moment
that I was privileged actually,

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to have her in my life.

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And so, over the course
of the next 12 weeks,

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I began to see something emerged,

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like the light that had dimmed
within this child,

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and the story that she'd been told
her entire nine years of life,

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"You're not worthy,
you're not smart enough,"

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or "You're not worth it,
or you're voiceless,"

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was beginning to unravel and disappear.

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And at the end of the program,

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she was participating,
but still not speaking.

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So on the very last day of the program,
I put the girls into a circle, and I said,

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"Alright ladies, let's just say one word
to describe our experience,"

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hoping that this might be the day
I would hear something from her.

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The first little girl said, "Fantastic!"

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Somebody said, "Awesome."

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I do remember one 8-year old goes,
"Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious,"

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because when you're eight

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that's like the most official,
longest word in the English language.

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And then I got around to Shakira,
and she just looked around the circle,

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and then she shook her head
and looked to the ground.

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So the following day, we have our banquet,
where all the kids come together,

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and we celebrate, and honor them
for their presence over the 12 weeks.

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And I had called every one
of the girls up, and I called Shakira up,

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and we give funny awards
like the "Sweat Goddess" award,

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or the "Runs with a Red Face" award.

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Then I had called Shakira up,
all 14 or 13 of her teammates behind her,

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and I call her up.

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And I say, "Alright girl, I give you
the 'Grand Communicator' award'.

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Because of how you communicate,
you know, that little sparkle in your eye,

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and you know, you communicate in ways
that are so much richer than many adults."

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And that little girl pulled
out of her pocket a card,

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and she handed me that card.

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And I read it.

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And I will tell you,
that in a room of 60 people,

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I felt great solitude
and a great connection to my divine,

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like I did on that July-7th run,

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and I handed that card back to her.

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And I said, "Will you read this to me?"

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And that little 9-year-old took that card,

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and she began to shake, and shake,
and when you're really thin,

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and you haven't been nourished
for a long time, you do like this.

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And then she read it out loud.

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And what she said was,
"Dear Molly, the word I wanted to say

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on the last day
of 'Girls on the Run' was love.

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Your friend, Shakira."

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And so my question to you, and I just
really, really ask you this question,

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what do you want to say?

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What stories do you tell yourself

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that limit you from saying what it is
you need to say to the world?"

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And I say, if Shakira can do it,
you can do it.

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And if it includes bright, red boots,
you better go get you some.

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(Laughter)

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That's it.

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(Applause)