[Script Info]
Title: 
[Events]
Format: Layer, Start, End, Style, Name, MarginL, MarginR, MarginV, Effect, Text
Dialogue: 0,0:00:15.66,0:00:19.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So tonight I’m gonna tell you\Nabout an invention of mine
Dialogue: 0,0:00:19.06,0:00:21.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,that saved my second marriage,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:21.22,0:00:26.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and also has increased the quality\Nof my life by at least 10x.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:26.30,0:00:30.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And for all of the partners\Nin the crowd,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:30.14,0:00:32.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and all of the people in the crowd\Nwho have partners,
Dialogue: 0,0:00:32.67,0:00:36.91,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I encourage you to \Nembrace this invention.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:37.54,0:00:39.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:00:39.17,0:00:40.69,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We all work very hard.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:40.69,0:00:44.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,These are some of our TechStars friends\Nfrom this year’s graduating class
Dialogue: 0,0:00:44.22,0:00:47.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,after three or four all-nighters.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:47.75,0:00:49.04,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We also live hard.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:49.04,0:00:53.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,For those of you that are climbers, this is\None of the rocks in Eldorado Canyon.
Dialogue: 0,0:00:53.14,0:00:58.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And we all enjoy this kind of thing\Nin the beautiful Boulder that we live in.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:01.50,0:01:03.18,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We are much much too connected.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:03.18,0:01:07.73,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I did a tweet about at 9 o’clock \Nfrom my house in Homer, Alaska,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:07.73,0:01:09.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,a couple of weeks ago,\Nsaying I need a picture
Dialogue: 0,0:01:09.94,0:01:12.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,of somebody who’s got too many\Nelectronic devices in their world.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:12.78,0:01:18.06,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I got twenty back\Nwithin about fifteen minutes.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:19.89,0:01:22.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Life is really complicated.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:22.16,0:01:27.02,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We spend all of this time dealing with all of this \Ncrazy shit that none of us really understands,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:27.02,0:01:30.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,or maybe we think we understand it\Nbut we don’t really understand it.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:30.45,0:01:34.26,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it’s moving faster \Nand faster all the time.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:34.99,0:01:36.89,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We already heard this once tonight
Dialogue: 0,0:01:36.89,0:01:39.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,when we were learning about\Nhow to do social media better.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:40.07,0:01:43.33,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But relationships are hard.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:43.73,0:01:46.79,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I married my high school girlfriend\Nwhen I was 21.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:46.79,0:01:50.27,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:01:50.27,0:01:53.88,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, I was legally old enough to drink,
Dialogue: 0,0:01:53.88,0:01:57.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,but I should not have been legally \Nold enough to get married.
Dialogue: 0,0:01:57.78,0:02:02.36,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,On my honeymoon, three days in,\NI realized that I had made a mistake.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:02.85,0:02:07.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,About a year afterwords I was \Nthat dude in the middle. (Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:02:07.62,0:02:10.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I should've been the dude on the left,\Nbut I was the dude in the middle.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:11.13,0:02:12.62,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Relationships are hard.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:12.62,0:02:15.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I failed once. I got divorced\Na couple years later.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:16.55,0:02:21.50,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[Welcome to Fail, Population: You] \N(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:02:21.50,0:02:23.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,In 2001,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:23.67,0:02:26.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I almost failed again.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:26.08,0:02:29.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,For those of you that have been \Ninvolved in technology companies
Dialogue: 0,0:02:29.80,0:02:31.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in and around the internet bubble,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:31.29,0:02:36.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,you know what the pace of things\Nwere like in 1999, 2000, 2001.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:36.17,0:02:39.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I was embroiled in \Nthe midst of all of that,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:39.95,0:02:43.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and on a trip to some friends \Nover the weekend
Dialogue: 0,0:02:43.28,0:02:45.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,in Rhode Island, I met Amy in Boston
Dialogue: 0,0:02:45.38,0:02:49.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,after I was in New York and \Nshe flew to Boston to meet me,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:49.09,0:02:52.81,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I rent -- had a driver drive us both \Ndown to the Rhode Island,
Dialogue: 0,0:02:52.81,0:02:56.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which is all of an hour and a half, \Nso why I had a driver drive us, I've no idea.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:56.59,0:02:59.53,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I spent entire time in the car\Non the phone.
Dialogue: 0,0:02:59.53,0:03:02.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We got to our friends' house at\Nabout 4 o’clock in the afternoon.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:02.32,0:03:04.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I proceeded to spend the next \Ncouple of hours on the phone
Dialogue: 0,0:03:04.59,0:03:06.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,as she hang out with our two friends.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:06.92,0:03:08.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We went out to dinner.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:08.28,0:03:11.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,At dinner, we were having \Na nice dinner,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:11.01,0:03:13.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and about 30 minutes into \Ndinner I get a phone call,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:13.58,0:03:16.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and I come back to dinner\Nin time for dessert.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:16.08,0:03:21.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And at the end of that we go \Nback to our friends' house.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:21.14,0:03:23.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No, I did not get laid that night.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:23.17,0:03:25.51,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That was not on the agenda. \N(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:03:25.51,0:03:28.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Amy turned to me as we got into bed,\Nand she said "I’m done."
Dialogue: 0,0:03:28.55,0:03:33.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I said to her, "Yeah, men, this was \Na tough week and tired. Just a lot of work."
Dialogue: 0,0:03:33.37,0:03:34.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And she said, "No no no. I’m done.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:34.80,0:03:37.32,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You are not a very good roommate."
Dialogue: 0,0:03:37.32,0:03:40.76,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I realized that I was almost there.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:40.98,0:03:43.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So, being a nerd and an engineer,
Dialogue: 0,0:03:43.59,0:03:47.35,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I decided to apply some \Nengineering thinking to this.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:47.35,0:03:51.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I said to Amy, "Look, I’m not done\Nand you are not really done."
Dialogue: 0,0:03:51.20,0:03:53.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She wasn't mad, but she wasn’t really done.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:53.49,0:03:55.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is, you know, 2001.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:55.98,0:03:59.68,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I said, "Let’s just talk this weekend\Nand come up with something.
Dialogue: 0,0:03:59.68,0:04:02.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Will you do me a favor? \NJust give me some rules."
Dialogue: 0,0:04:02.05,0:04:05.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That’s what I really need.\NI just need a bunch of rules.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:05.03,0:04:07.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I’m gonna talk to you \Nabout one of them,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:07.71,0:04:12.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,which is something we do, which we call\N"one week per quarter off the grid."
Dialogue: 0,0:04:12.23,0:04:16.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Since 2001 almost 40 times,
Dialogue: 0,0:04:16.05,0:04:21.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,once a quarter, Amy and I go \Noff the grid and totally disconnect.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:21.41,0:04:25.37,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We go to the airport on Saturday morning,\NI hand her my telephone.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:25.37,0:04:27.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She turns it off.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:27.14,0:04:31.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She often tries to drop it in between\Nwhere you board the plane.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:31.61,0:04:33.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She puts it in her pocket.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:33.61,0:04:38.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We go, we sit down,\NI get it back the following Saturday.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:38.15,0:04:41.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,No phone. No email. No schedule.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:41.83,0:04:47.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The only person on the planet who knows\Nhow to find me is my assistant Kelly.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:47.54,0:04:50.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And she tries never \Nto find me that week.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:51.06,0:04:53.94,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,During this -- Hang on one second.
Dialogue: 0,0:04:54.22,0:04:55.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:55.34,0:04:58.21,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Hey, sweetie!" \N(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:04:58.21,0:05:01.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"No I’m talking to those people at \Nthat TED thing I was doing." (Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:01.82,0:05:07.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"I’ll be home in a bit. Not too long.\NI love you. Yeah, OK."
Dialogue: 0,0:05:08.87,0:05:12.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Whistles) (Applause)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:12.71,0:05:16.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,That’s the telephone version\Nof golden retriever eyes.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:16.82,0:05:19.86,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Once we all have faced time running\Nit'll be a little different.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:19.86,0:05:22.42,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,These are my dogs looking at Amy
Dialogue: 0,0:05:22.42,0:05:24.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,while I'm taking a picture of them.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:24.34,0:05:26.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,For all of you out there that are men,
Dialogue: 0,0:05:26.80,0:05:29.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,remember this picture. \N(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:29.70,0:05:33.67,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,This is what your spouse \Nor partner wants.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:33.72,0:05:40.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,(Laughter) (Applause) (Cheers)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:41.35,0:05:43.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I sleep a lot.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:43.16,0:05:47.38,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wear a thing on my head when I sleep\Nso I know how much I sleep.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:47.38,0:05:50.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I got a 137. (Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:05:50.83,0:05:52.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It's about 12 and a half hours of sleep
Dialogue: 0,0:05:52.83,0:05:54.46,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,one day on vacation.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:54.46,0:05:56.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I read a lot.
Dialogue: 0,0:05:56.19,0:06:00.58,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If you look at my Shelfari list, you'll see that \NI don’t just read serious business books.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:00.58,0:06:02.61,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I read all kinds of different things.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:02.61,0:06:06.28,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I encourage all of you when you \Ngo on your week off the grid to do that.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:06.28,0:06:11.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I exercise. \N(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:06:11.56,0:06:15.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,One can have goals, right? \N(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:06:15.49,0:06:16.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I relax a lot.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:16.87,0:06:18.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We spend a lot of the time\Nthat week together.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:18.87,0:06:20.40,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We don’t do adventure vacations.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:20.42,0:06:23.03,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We just spend time together.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:23.03,0:06:26.19,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And that leads to\Na lot of adult entertainment.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:26.19,0:06:29.97,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,[CENSORED] \N(Laughter)
Dialogue: 0,0:06:29.97,0:06:36.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Now, I fail at this\Nabout once every eight times.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:36.28,0:06:38.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And this is important.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:38.05,0:06:41.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I like the notion of mastering failure.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:41.82,0:06:46.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You have to embrace the fact that\Nwe're human, and we will fail, and that’s OK.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:46.47,0:06:48.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And because of this algorithm,
Dialogue: 0,0:06:49.01,0:06:53.29,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Amy and I have agreed that it's OK\Nfor me to fail once every eight times.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:53.29,0:06:55.45,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There's no damage asociated with that.
Dialogue: 0,0:06:55.45,0:06:58.83,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And in fact, what it does is \Nit makes the next seven times,\N
Dialogue: 0,0:06:58.83,0:07:01.80,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,until I'm ready to fail again,\Nthat much better.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:01.80,0:07:06.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,So recognize that this algorithm has\Nsome failure in it and that’s OK.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:06.56,0:07:09.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,But when it works, \Nit's priceless.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:09.15,0:07:12.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And I find that over\Nthe last ten years or so,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:12.39,0:07:17.77,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the one week a quarter\Nthat I take off and totally disconnect,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:17.77,0:07:21.63,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,allows me to do all the other things\Nthat I do, with intensity that I do,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:21.63,0:07:24.14,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the other 11 weeks a quarter.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:24.14,0:07:26.78,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I've had numerous people \Nover the years tell me,
Dialogue: 0,0:07:26.78,0:07:28.16,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"Oh, I can’t do that."
Dialogue: 0,0:07:28.16,0:07:30.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,"That’s so hard", whatever,\Nand it’s just bullshit.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:30.39,0:07:31.92,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It’s totally doable.
Dialogue: 0,0:07:31.92,0:07:34.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And it’ll change your life.\NI encourage everybody in this room
Dialogue: 0,0:07:34.70,0:07:37.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to try it and see how it feels.\N
Dialogue: 0,0:07:37.20,0:07:39.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Thanks and good night! \N(Applause)