Hello there (audience cheers)
He is the most famous stuffed toy since Tickle Me Elmo
He is the star of the number one comedy of the year
and he's got an unrated version of Ted
debuting today on Bluray and DVD
Please welcome, a guest without genitals, Ted!
(band plays) (audience cheers)
First of all, you look great, very plush
Congratulations on the success of the movie
How's everything? How you doing?
I'm good, I'm good, man
Thanks for having me
This is so much fun
It's great to have you here
I love the movie. I thought it was really hilarious
and you were great in it too
Well, you know I wanted to do a comedy
(crowd chuckles)
My last movie was, of course,
my rainforest documentary Stop Choppin'
(audience laughs)
(Host) I saw that
Did you see that? Yeah
(Host) Very powerful
Thank you
Now are you getting recognized a lot
now that you've done the movie?
Yeah, I am actually
The other day I was at the mall
and I was getting mobbed
(audience laughs)
and I had to run into a Build-A-Bear
just to blend in
(audience laughs)
Well that must be fun
it must be like going home for you
No, it's not fun
You ever been in one of them Build-A-Bear places?
It's sick, it's sick
Why are you guys Frankenstein-ing bears like Nazi doctors?
(audience laughs)
What kind of species are you that you would do that?
It's a very good question
That's humans for you
You comfort us and we dismember you
(audience laughs)
That's great pal
Do you have any plans for the holidays?
I'm gonna go to the mall and ask Santa for a penis
(host and audience laugh)
You can probably get that at Build-A-Bear
(audience laughs)
Yeah probably go right in
What's next for you career wise?
Have you been offered other film roles?
I have. They offered me Peter Dinklage's part on Game of Thrones
(Host) They did?
They did, believe it or not
I turned it down
There are dragons there and I am highly flammable
(host and audience laugh)
It wouldn't work out
(Host) Are there any plans to make Ted 2?
There are plans, yes
We're basically just gonna do the same movie
but in Thailand, like The Hangover
(host and audience laugh)
(Host) You know, I have to say you look a little zoned out
Are you stoned right now?
I, yes, no, no, no sir
I am not, drugs ruin lives.
(Host) ok, alright
So your movie Ted is out today on Bluray and DVD
What will we see that we did not see in theaters?
You can see basically all the stuff
that we didn't think was good enough to be in the movie
(audience laughs)
There's a lot of deleted scenes
some extra crap
(audience laughs)
trading cards, Ted keychain
There's a cup of coffee in there
There is?
(audience laughs)
I hope I didn't spill it
Would you mind if we showed one of the deleted scenes?
No, do it, do it pal
Alright, we have the clip right here, I believe, let's take a look
(audience laughs)
(Guest) Wait a minute, no no no
(Host) Is that you?
(Guest) No, we got the wrong clip
(Host) Looks like you're getting some action there
(Guest) Now before we judge here,
that dog used to run Universal Studios
(audience laughs)
(Guest) How do you think I got the job?
(Host) Well, you mean business
(Guest) I was all about succeeding
If you want to see unrated scenes from Ted
get the Bluray or DVD, in stores today
Thank you so much
(audience cheers)
It's a delight to have you here
Thank you so much
Ted, everybody
(audience continues cheering)