0:00:00.755,0:00:06.089
[musical interlude]

0:00:06.089,0:00:07.200
[door opens]

0:00:07.200,0:00:07.717
Hey, Pewds?

0:00:12.672,0:00:14.777
[clicks mouse] What?

0:00:14.777,0:00:16.040
I wrote a book!

0:00:16.162,0:00:17.646
I think you're gonna love it.

0:00:17.922,0:00:19.927
It was inspired by you.

0:00:24.374,0:00:26.009
This has already been written.

0:00:26.009,0:00:26.780
[feigns surprise] What?!

0:00:26.780,0:00:28.333
Maybe it'll be different.

0:00:33.380,0:00:34.797
This is a graphic gay porno.

0:00:35.950,0:00:37.990
Are you telling me the other <i>Twilight</i> is the same?

0:00:37.990,0:00:40.134
It's pretty much the same thing.

0:00:40.980,0:00:41.455
I'm sorry.

0:00:41.455,0:00:42.278
Shit!

0:00:42.986,0:00:44.827
What's with all the duck references though?

0:00:45.643,0:00:47.075
[creepy music starts up] What do you mean, "duck references?"

0:00:48.075,0:00:52.182
I'm a duck. Quack, quack. Stupid Pewds doesn't suspect a thing."

0:00:53.074,0:00:54.169
Where did you get that idea?

0:00:55.322,0:00:56.328
[in menacing tone] Why are you sweating?

0:00:56.328,0:00:57.815
What do you mean, sweating?

0:00:59.200,0:01:02.702
Haters gonna hate; ducks gonna duck. Quack.

0:01:03.686,0:01:04.300
Oh shit!

0:01:04.300,0:01:09.125
[crash] [punch] [PewDiePie groans in pain]

0:01:09.125,0:01:10.353
What's going on here?

0:01:12.277,0:01:13.599
[paper rustling]

0:01:13.599,0:01:14.686
What is this?!

0:01:15.133,0:01:17.526
It's so beautiful!

0:01:19.080,0:01:20.022
Did you write this?

0:01:20.022,0:01:21.768
Uhhh...yeah?

0:01:21.768,0:01:28.426
[soft rock music starts playing] <i>It's been the longest winter without you...</i>

0:01:28.426,0:01:34.373
<i>I didn't know where to turn to</i>

0:01:34.373,0:01:39.989
<i>See somehow I can't forget you</i>

0:01:39.989,0:01:42.325
<i>after all that we've been-</i>

0:01:42.325,0:01:43.458
[phonograph screeches to a halt]

0:01:46.334,0:01:48.024
I know a duck when I see one, bitch.

0:01:48.024,0:01:49.781
[chainsaw growls]

0:01:53.228,0:01:57.289
I feel like I'm mother fuckin' stuck...in this duck.

0:01:57.289,0:02:01.289
It makes me want to quack, like, "What the fuck is that?!"