WEBVTT 00:00:03.161 --> 00:00:25.117 (Music) NOTE Paragraph 00:00:25.117 --> 00:00:27.412 Good afternoon. NOTE Paragraph 00:00:27.412 --> 00:00:31.873 As you're all aware, we face difficult economic times. 00:00:31.873 --> 00:00:34.325 I come to you with a modest proposal 00:00:34.325 --> 00:00:36.857 for easing the financial burden. NOTE Paragraph 00:00:36.857 --> 00:00:38.390 This idea came to me while talking to 00:00:38.390 --> 00:00:41.362 a physicist friend of mine at MIT. 00:00:41.362 --> 00:00:44.051 He was struggling to explain something to me: 00:00:44.051 --> 00:00:48.627 a beautiful experiment that uses lasers to cool down matter. 00:00:48.627 --> 00:00:50.534 Now he confused me from the very start, 00:00:50.534 --> 00:00:52.888 because light doesn't cool things down. 00:00:52.888 --> 00:00:56.337 It makes it hotter. It's happening right now. 00:00:56.337 --> 00:00:58.880 The reason that you can see me standing here is because 00:00:58.880 --> 00:01:02.652 this room is filled with more than 100 quintillion photons, 00:01:02.652 --> 00:01:06.187 and they're moving randomly through the space, near the speed of light. 00:01:06.187 --> 00:01:07.703 All of them are different colors, 00:01:07.703 --> 00:01:09.643 they're rippling with different frequencies, 00:01:09.643 --> 00:01:12.518 and they're bouncing off every surface, including me, 00:01:12.518 --> 00:01:14.928 and some of those are flying directly into your eyes, 00:01:14.928 --> 00:01:18.128 and that's why your brain is forming an image of me standing here. NOTE Paragraph 00:01:18.128 --> 00:01:19.783 Now a laser is different. 00:01:19.783 --> 00:01:23.786 It also uses photons, but they're all synchronized, 00:01:23.786 --> 00:01:26.493 and if you focus them into a beam, 00:01:26.493 --> 00:01:28.888 what you have is an incredibly useful tool. 00:01:28.888 --> 00:01:31.024 The control of a laser is so precise 00:01:31.024 --> 00:01:33.698 that you can perform surgery inside of an eye, 00:01:33.698 --> 00:01:36.343 you can use it to store massive amounts of data, 00:01:36.343 --> 00:01:38.673 and you can use it for this beautiful experiment 00:01:38.673 --> 00:01:41.146 that my friend was struggling to explain. 00:01:41.146 --> 00:01:44.401 First you trap atoms in a special bottle. 00:01:44.401 --> 00:01:47.361 It uses electromagnetic fields to isolate the atoms 00:01:47.361 --> 00:01:49.547 from the noise of the environment. 00:01:49.547 --> 00:01:52.030 And the atoms themselves are quite violent, 00:01:52.030 --> 00:01:56.074 but if you fire lasers that are precisely tuned to the right frequency, 00:01:56.074 --> 00:01:58.702 an atom will briefly absorb those photons 00:01:58.702 --> 00:02:00.585 and tend to slow down. 00:02:00.585 --> 00:02:03.897 Little by little it gets colder 00:02:03.897 --> 00:02:08.410 until eventually it approaches absolute zero. NOTE Paragraph 00:02:08.410 --> 00:02:11.586 Now if you use the right kind of atoms and you get them cold enough, 00:02:11.586 --> 00:02:15.363 something truly bizarre happens. 00:02:15.363 --> 00:02:18.185 It's no longer a solid, a liquid or a gas. 00:02:18.185 --> 00:02:22.125 It enters a new state of matter called a superfluid. 00:02:22.125 --> 00:02:24.412 The atoms lose their individual identity, 00:02:24.412 --> 00:02:27.239 and the rules from the quantum world take over, 00:02:27.239 --> 00:02:31.334 and that's what gives superfluids such spooky properties. 00:02:31.334 --> 00:02:34.786 For example, if you shine light through a superfluid, 00:02:34.786 --> 00:02:37.811 it is able to slow photons down 00:02:37.811 --> 00:02:40.970 to 60 kilometers per hour. 00:02:47.585 --> 00:02:50.638 Another spooky property is that it flows 00:02:50.638 --> 00:02:53.274 with absolutely no viscosity or friction, 00:02:53.274 --> 00:02:55.538 so if you were to take the lid off that bottle, 00:02:55.538 --> 00:02:57.633 it won't stay inside. 00:02:57.633 --> 00:03:00.410 A thin film will creep up the inside wall, 00:03:00.410 --> 00:03:04.634 flow over the top and right out the outside. 00:03:04.634 --> 00:03:07.591 Now of course, the moment that it does hit the outside environment, 00:03:07.591 --> 00:03:11.307 and its temperature rises by even a fraction of a degree, 00:03:11.307 --> 00:03:13.430 it immediately turns back into normal matter. 00:03:13.430 --> 00:03:16.996 Superfluids are one of the most fragile things we've ever discovered. 00:03:16.996 --> 00:03:19.357 And this is the great pleasure of science: 00:03:19.357 --> 00:03:23.572 the defeat of our intuition through experimentation. NOTE Paragraph 00:03:23.572 --> 00:03:25.261 But the experiment is not the end of the story, 00:03:25.261 --> 00:03:28.787 because you still have to transmit that knowledge to other people. 00:03:28.787 --> 00:03:31.163 I have a Ph.D in molecular biology. 00:03:31.163 --> 00:03:34.696 I still barely understand what most scientists are talking about. 00:03:34.696 --> 00:03:37.646 So as my friend was trying to explain that experiment, 00:03:37.646 --> 00:03:40.592 it seemed like the more he said, 00:03:40.592 --> 00:03:43.565 the less I understood. 00:03:43.565 --> 00:03:45.936 Because if you're trying to give someone the big picture 00:03:45.936 --> 00:03:50.015 of a complex idea, to really capture its essence, 00:03:50.015 --> 00:03:53.598 the fewer words you use, the better. 00:03:53.598 --> 00:03:56.917 In fact, the ideal may be to use no words at all. 00:03:56.917 --> 00:03:58.474 I remember thinking, my friend could have explained 00:03:58.474 --> 00:04:01.606 that entire experiment with a dance. 00:04:01.606 --> 00:04:05.974 Of course, there never seem to be any dancers around when you need them. NOTE Paragraph 00:04:05.974 --> 00:04:07.863 Now, the idea is not as crazy as it sounds. 00:04:07.863 --> 00:04:11.365 I started a contest four years ago called Dance Your Ph.D. 00:04:11.365 --> 00:04:13.980 Instead of explaining their research with words, 00:04:13.980 --> 00:04:16.880 scientists have to explain it with dance. 00:04:16.880 --> 00:04:19.249 Now surprisingly, it seems to work. 00:04:19.249 --> 00:04:22.521 Dance really can make science easier to understand. 00:04:22.521 --> 00:04:24.317 But don't take my word for it. 00:04:24.317 --> 00:04:27.204 Go on the Internet and search for "Dance Your Ph.D." 00:04:27.204 --> 00:04:30.462 There are hundreds of dancing scientists waiting for you. NOTE Paragraph 00:04:30.462 --> 00:04:32.545 The most surprising thing that I've learned while running this contest 00:04:32.545 --> 00:04:37.834 is that some scientists are now working directly with dancers on their research. 00:04:37.834 --> 00:04:39.714 For example, at the University of Minnesota, 00:04:39.714 --> 00:04:42.219 there's a biomedical engineer named David Odde, 00:04:42.219 --> 00:04:45.377 and he works with dancers to study how cells move. 00:04:45.377 --> 00:04:47.786 They do it by changing their shape. 00:04:47.786 --> 00:04:50.605 When a chemical signal washes up on one side, 00:04:50.605 --> 00:04:53.730 it triggers the cell to expand its shape on that side, 00:04:53.730 --> 00:04:57.011 because the cell is constantly touching and tugging at the environment. 00:04:57.011 --> 00:05:00.982 So that allows cells to ooze along in the right directions. 00:05:00.982 --> 00:05:04.920 But what seems so slow and graceful from the outside 00:05:04.920 --> 00:05:07.349 is really more like chaos inside, 00:05:07.349 --> 00:05:11.752 because cells control their shape with a skeleton of rigid protein fibers, 00:05:11.752 --> 00:05:14.597 and those fibers are constantly falling apart. 00:05:14.597 --> 00:05:17.166 But just as quickly as they explode, 00:05:17.166 --> 00:05:19.583 more proteins attach to the ends and grow them longer, 00:05:19.583 --> 00:05:21.766 so it's constantly changing 00:05:21.766 --> 00:05:24.764 just to remain exactly the same. 00:05:24.764 --> 00:05:27.934 Now, David builds mathematical models of this and then he tests those in the lab, 00:05:27.934 --> 00:05:30.709 but before he does that, he works with dancers 00:05:30.709 --> 00:05:34.410 to figure out what kinds of models to build in the first place. 00:05:34.410 --> 00:05:37.503 It's basically efficient brainstorming, 00:05:37.503 --> 00:05:39.758 and when I visited David to learn about his research, 00:05:39.758 --> 00:05:43.102 he used dancers to explain it to me 00:05:43.102 --> 00:05:47.644 rather than the usual method: PowerPoint. NOTE Paragraph 00:05:47.644 --> 00:05:49.997 And this brings me to my modest proposal. 00:05:49.997 --> 00:05:52.866 I think that bad PowerPoint presentations 00:05:52.866 --> 00:05:55.538 are a serious threat to the global economy. NOTE Paragraph 00:05:55.538 --> 00:06:03.467 (Laughter) (Applause) NOTE Paragraph 00:06:03.467 --> 00:06:08.346 Now it does depend on how you measure it, of course, 00:06:08.346 --> 00:06:13.115 but one estimate has put the drain at 250 million dollars per day. 00:06:13.115 --> 00:06:15.296 Now that assumes half-hour presentations 00:06:15.296 --> 00:06:17.353 for an average audience of four people 00:06:17.353 --> 00:06:19.672 with salaries of 35,000 dollars, 00:06:19.672 --> 00:06:21.632 and it conservatively assumes that 00:06:21.632 --> 00:06:25.564 about a quarter of the presentations are a complete waste of time, 00:06:25.564 --> 00:06:28.143 and given that there are some apparently 00:06:28.143 --> 00:06:31.415 30 million PowerPoint presentations created every day, 00:06:31.415 --> 00:06:34.303 that would indeed add up to an annual waste 00:06:34.303 --> 00:06:37.399 of 100 billion dollars. 00:06:37.399 --> 00:06:39.767 Of course, that's just the time we're losing 00:06:39.767 --> 00:06:41.990 sitting through presentations. 00:06:41.990 --> 00:06:46.306 There are other costs, because PowerPoint is a tool, 00:06:46.306 --> 00:06:49.636 and like any tool, it can and will be abused. 00:06:49.636 --> 00:06:52.126 To borrow a concept from my country's CIA, 00:06:52.126 --> 00:06:55.241 it helps you to soften up your audience. 00:06:55.241 --> 00:06:59.489 It distracts them with pretty pictures, irrelevant data. 00:06:59.489 --> 00:07:03.229 It allows you to create the illusion of competence, 00:07:03.229 --> 00:07:05.989 the illusion of simplicity, 00:07:05.989 --> 00:07:10.716 and most destructively, the illusion of understanding. NOTE Paragraph 00:07:10.716 --> 00:07:14.960 So now my country is 15 trillion dollars in debt. 00:07:14.960 --> 00:07:19.945 Our leaders are working tirelessly to try and find ways to save money. 00:07:19.945 --> 00:07:24.414 One idea is to drastically reduce public support for the arts. 00:07:24.414 --> 00:07:26.622 For example, our National Endowment for the Arts, 00:07:26.622 --> 00:07:29.199 with its $150 million budget, 00:07:29.199 --> 00:07:32.211 slashing that program would immediately reduce the national debt 00:07:32.211 --> 00:07:35.572 by about one one-thousandth of a percent. 00:07:35.572 --> 00:07:37.312 One certainly can't argue with those numbers. 00:07:37.312 --> 00:07:42.594 However, once we eliminate public funding for the arts, 00:07:42.594 --> 00:07:45.266 there will be some drawbacks. 00:07:45.266 --> 00:07:49.662 The artists on the street will swell the ranks of the unemployed. 00:07:49.662 --> 00:07:52.069 Many will turn to drug abuse and prostitution, 00:07:52.069 --> 00:07:55.188 and that will inevitably lower property values in urban neighborhoods. 00:07:55.188 --> 00:08:00.095 All of this could wipe out the savings we're hoping to make in the first place. NOTE Paragraph 00:08:00.095 --> 00:08:03.336 I shall now, therefore, humbly propose my own thoughts, 00:08:03.336 --> 00:08:07.118 which I hope will not be liable to the least objection. 00:08:07.118 --> 00:08:09.011 Once we eliminate public funding for the artists, 00:08:09.011 --> 00:08:10.598 let's put them back to work 00:08:10.598 --> 00:08:13.619 by using them instead of PowerPoint. 00:08:13.619 --> 00:08:17.102 As a test case, I propose we start with American dancers. 00:08:17.102 --> 00:08:19.255 After all, they are the most perishable of their kind, 00:08:19.255 --> 00:08:21.414 prone to injury and very slow to heal 00:08:21.414 --> 00:08:24.231 due to our health care system. 00:08:24.231 --> 00:08:27.374 Rather than dancing our Ph.Ds, 00:08:27.374 --> 00:08:30.988 we should use dance to explain all of our complex problems. 00:08:30.988 --> 00:08:33.848 Imagine our politicians using dance 00:08:33.848 --> 00:08:37.626 to explain why we must invade a foreign country 00:08:37.626 --> 00:08:40.498 or bail out an investment bank. 00:08:40.498 --> 00:08:42.460 It's sure to help. NOTE Paragraph 00:08:42.460 --> 00:08:46.212 Of course someday, in the deep future, 00:08:46.212 --> 00:08:48.593 a technology of persuasion 00:08:48.593 --> 00:08:52.022 even more powerful than PowerPoint may be invented, 00:08:52.022 --> 00:08:55.566 rendering dancers unnecessary as tools of rhetoric. 00:08:55.566 --> 00:08:58.142 However, I trust that by that day, 00:08:58.142 --> 00:09:01.457 we shall have passed this present financial calamity. 00:09:01.457 --> 00:09:04.823 Perhaps by then we will be able to afford the luxury 00:09:04.823 --> 00:09:07.943 of just sitting in an audience 00:09:07.943 --> 00:09:09.783 with no other purpose 00:09:09.783 --> 00:09:14.349 than to witness the human form in motion. 00:09:14.349 --> 00:10:25.174 (Music) 00:10:25.189 --> 00:10:54.204 (Applause)