WEBVTT

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[Audience chattering.]

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Good afternoon!

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I am Reinaldo Garcia.

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And you are the audience.

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[Laughter, applause.]

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Okay! Um, 
turn off all cell phones, please.

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And, we're in a residential
neighborhood,

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so, no drag racing down the streets
of quiet Carmel, when we leave.

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The show is about an hour and 
10 minutes long.

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There is some harsh language
in the piece, okay?

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I'll be taking confessionals
in my booth over here,

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after the plays are over,


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[Audience chuckles]

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if anybody wants
to unburden their hearts, okay?

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So, welcome to "Dream Butchers."

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[Applause.]

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[Acoustic guitars]

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[Sings] You crawled across dry thorns

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and chewed cut glass.

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Please come through my door,
lay down on the grass.

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[Guitar phrase]

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I don't care where you've been,
in the dark side of town.

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Your history might be shameful.

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I will always let you in,
I will never let you down.

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[Guitar chords]

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I'm entertaining angels.

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[Acoustic guitars]

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Now you're down on your luck,
your spirit's broke.

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I see your beggar's cup
filled with busted hope.

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Let this new day begin,
before the sun goes down.

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I'll know I served an angel.

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I will always let you in,
I will never let you down.

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I'm entertaining angels.

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[Guitar flourish.]

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Hello, stranger. Drop your things.
Come on in.

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There's no danger.
I see the wings beneath your skin.

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I am no holy man.
Just a human

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who must obey the plan
for a communion.

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It's a mortal sin
if I would renounce a man

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whose life is painful.

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I will always let you in,
I will never let you down.

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Because I'm entertaining you angels.

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[Guitar flourish.]

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[End chord holds.]

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[Applause.]

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[Spoken] I played baseball
in 2 different baseball leagues around town.

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And I also umpire, uh, baseball.

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And our opening piece,
"Low and Inside,"

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is about a local man

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uh, whose career,
whose professional career was destroyed.

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But there is a romance to baseball.

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And I wrote this song up in the 
San Jose Giants stadium.

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Uh, I recommend going to 
Minor League baseball.

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You get right up next to the players.

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They are the future stars of the game.

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It's really exhilarating to me.

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So, I wrote this song,
as the players were warming up.

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It's called 
"The Church of Baseball."

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[Cheerful acoustic guitars]

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The ground crew rakes the infield,
they line the batter's box with lime.

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[Guitars]

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Then they spray the baselines,
dust is down 'til players take the field.

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The church of baseball.
Warm in summer air.

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The church of baseball.
It's all prepared.

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Now the players stretch and run.
Boys of summer filled with dreams.

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[Guitars]

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The fan girls scream when
the local boy warms up in the sun.

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[Guitars strum]

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The church of baseball.
Blesses all the minor leagues.

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The church of baseball.
It'll last for centuries.

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[Guitars]

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Local talent sings the anthem.
Out of tune loudspeakers squeal.

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[Guitars]

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Now the home team takes the field.
Bonus babies, tall and handsome.

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[Guitars]

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The church of baseball.
It's a sacred space.

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The church of baseball.
Steal a base.

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For Willie, and Maury,
Even Ricky Henderson too.

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The church of baseball,
It welcomes you.

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[Guitar flourish.]

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"Low and Inside."
[Applause.]

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[Announcer] I get it.

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Baseball is a historical game.
I like to compare different things,

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compare different eras.

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But how in the world, John Ruck,
can you compare a guy

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getting all these hits in Japan,
and then add it up with the Majors,

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and then say he truly hit
came from a paper on point. You can't.

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The people should know.
What Pete Rose has done is incredible.

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[Announcer commentary]

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To say he has passed Pete Rose,
as all time hit leader, we can't do that.

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[Announcer voices continue.]

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Hey Neal.
[Drunkenly mumbles.]

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[Sports announcers continue]

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Uh. Hm. Uh. 
[Laughs.]

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[Sports announcers]

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Gimme a 7 & 7.
And go easy on the 7-Up.

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[Announcers continue]

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Would you turn down the --
turn the TV off?

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[Announcers continue]

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I gotta give a reason?
I been comin' here for 5, 6 years?

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Because! I don't wanna
see, hear, or read about baseball.

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Whatever the [bleep] is happening!

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[Announcers stop]
[No audio]

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And another, por favor.

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No tab tonight.

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I'm leavin' no debts.

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You remember Jason?
Big, body builder type?

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Yeah! With the rash down his neck.

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You know any hit men?
Ahh, just kidding.

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I think. You remember Roosevelt?
Black guy, with a face like a badger?

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He went over big time.

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R - R - Rosie?
Neal. You live upstairs.

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There's nobody here.
Can I stay a while?

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Gracias, mi amigo.


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Ahhh. [Exhales.]

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You know me.
I'm a friendly guy, right?

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So does professional baseball.

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It was in Marietta, Georgia.
Pre-season sessions.

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Director of officials tells me
I've been elevated to crew chief.

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Working beside of me,
two guys with me.

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Jason Olivetti, and 
Roosevelt Truman.

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"Jason Olivetti!" I said.
"Oh no. No, no."

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"I heard he's a piece of work."

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"Rico!" he says.
"You're the kind of

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natural-born leader
who can get along with anybody."

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"Mentor the kid."

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Them's my marching orders.

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Two years away from the
Majors, a lifelong dream. Hmm.

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Through Berman, Chatanooga, Jackson,
Pensacola, Knoxville, Montgomery.

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Mobile, Cogsville. Athletes!
Dripping testosterone and doubt.

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Adonises driven by a dream.
And, there I am. Deep within it.

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Benevolent, dispensing justice.
Witnessing brilliance.

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John Smokes. Matt Holliday.
Juan Fiera. Ah! Ahh.

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A cavalcade of future stars.
Passing through my station

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on their way to immortality.

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The baseball field is a timeless Eden.

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And, into my crew chief's ear
slithered Jason Olivetti.

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Dwelling in a body stocking of a rash.

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You know it even discolored his weiner?

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Yes! I looked. 
Ahhhh.

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Don't be naive, Neal.
Everybody looks.

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Ahhh. Ehhhh. [Laughs.]

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Ahh. [Exhales.]

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You know....
I...I...I....

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Taking charge of a ball field
was always second nature for me.

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I was a catcher in college.
Field General. I ran the pitchers.

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Directed the fielders. Worked the umps.

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And when I wasn't drafted,
I went to umpire school.

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Vero Beach, Florida.
Dodger Town. Heh-heh.

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Ahh. Sailed right through.
Through rookies. Single ed.

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By my 3rd year, I was already crew chief.
Two guys under me.

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In a van supplied by the Majors.
First class hotels all through the South.

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Ha-ha! The future World Series ump!

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Tell me...tell me.
How does a guy who gets along

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with everybody, grow to hate a man?

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Who the mere sight of
provokes nausea and vomiting? Eh?

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Jason was a -- a strapping farm boy
who was seduced by big city ambition.

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Prostitutes. Marijuana. Hm?
Ah! I'll show you what I mean.

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We checked into a hotel.

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During dinner, Jason is flirting
with the waitress.

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Flirting. Ha. How's about this.

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[Hick accent] "That was one fine meal!
Mmm- mmm - mmm!

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But it lacked some spice.


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Why don't you come up to my room later,
and let me taste your pussy?"

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[Audience groans.]

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[His own voice again]
Then, he was down at the front desk.

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Proclaiming, bitching that his towels
were not white enough.

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He would weiner-wag the maid,
when he came out of the shower.

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Couple of times, he came back to his room
to find it ransacked.

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Well deserved, I'd say.

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Hm? Oh, on the diamond?
Okay.

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Jason's behind the ditch, right?
Guy hits a home run.

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As he's circling the bases,
Jason picks up the bat,

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and leans on it, like Mister Peanut
leaning on his cane.

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Right on home plate! Hmm?!
Ahh.

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No, he never smoked it in the van.

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Well, just the idea of driving through
the South, with my protege,

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holding grass -- terrified me!

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No. Nooo, no. I could never report him.

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You have no idea what it would do
to my reputation.

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[Laughs] And his taste in music.

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We had -- we had a rule.

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The guy behind the wheel
chooses the tunes. Hmm?

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Jason wouldn't be out --
we wouldn't be out of the parking lot,

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the hotel parking lot,
not 5 minutes.

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Jason slides in his
"Greatest Hits of the '70s" CD.

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"Afternoon Delight."
"Summer Breeze."

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Da-da-da-da

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"Blowin' through the jasmine
of our minds."

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"One Toke Over the Line."

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From Mobile to Jackson!

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Jason is the reason I drink
these 7 & 7s.

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His official beverage of choice.

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I, I enjoyed them, to --
establish rapport.

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Roosevelt, too.
Drank in the back seat.

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Tapping away at his [bleep]ing 
iPhone.

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Watching porn.
Aiming the camera at the front seat.

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Making what he calls his
'POV dramalogue.'

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Ahhh.

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Okay. So. So! So.

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We are in 'bama now.

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The Barons pitted against 
their arch-rivals, Huntsville Stars.

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Battling for the title.
Two games left.

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Two games,
and Jason is out of my life!

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Yeah. 
The Barons, and the Stars.

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Huge rivals. Mutual hate.

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So.

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It all comes down to two outs,
bottom of the 9th, bases loaded.

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Barons down 3.

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22 year old defector Cuban.
22 year old Cuba defector Oscar Morales

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is a 5'2" phenom.

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Already, he has tripled, and stolen home.

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Now, he slides to the plate,
with a hit on the line.

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Huntsville pitcher launches a fast ball.

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Inside and low.

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Ball one.

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The catcher --
the wisecracking, Polack misfit

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Anje Prozinski,
asks for a clean one.

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"Gimme a ball you can see."

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Hm? Of course! I tossed him!

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The guy turns on me.
Huntsville keeper leaps out of the dugout,

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restraining Prozinski with one hand,
and screaming for an explanation.

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"I dunno what the guy said."

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"You're not allowed to argue
balls and strikes. You know that."

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The manager looks at this catcher.
Says, "you say that?"

00:18:05.937 --> 00:18:12.751
"Yeah. Hey. If Blue here grew an eye,
he'd be a Cyclops."

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Huntsville manager nearly breaks his ribs,
he's laughing so hard.

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The fans are going ape-shit.
The pitcher comes in to the ditch.

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Jason and Roosevelt run up
to restore order. Hmm. Ugghhh.

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I'm coming to it. Gimme a sec.
Wait a minute.

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And then, the pitcher says,

00:18:39.198 --> 00:18:45.279
"Hey, Blue. We know you're blind.
We've seen your wife."

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Just a minute here. 
I'm coming to that.

00:18:48.271 --> 00:18:50.591
Okay. Now, back to the game.

00:18:50.591 --> 00:18:57.554
Okay. So. The pitcher, the new pitcher
delivers a rising fast ball.

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Morales fouls it back, knocks off my mask.
I go down to my knees.

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Someone in the Stars dugout yells,

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"Hey, Blue! Get up off your knees!
You're BLOWING the game!"

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I wobble over to the Huntsville dugout.
I give 'em the 'stink eye.'

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That settles them down.

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Next pitch, Morales slams
way down the right field line.

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Fouled by inches.
Counts one and two.

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Next pitch a slider, outside.


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But Morales, already, you know,
what we call a professional hitter,

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fouls off the next five pitches
before taking a ball

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millimeters over the plate.

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The new catcher goes,
"Hey Blue!"

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I go, "Ah-ah!
One peep out of you,

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you shower with your friend."

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Guy goes, "Peep!"

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I swallow it.

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Morales fouls off
the next 3 pitches too.

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Eh? Good -- good hitter?
You better believe it.

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OK. So, now...

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So now, the Huntsville pitcher
hangs a curve.

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Oh-ho-ho-ho!

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Morales drools.

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He spins on it!

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And launches the ball
high into the Alabama night.

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The crowd leaps as one,

00:20:28.176 --> 00:20:31.060
as the ball is
Pensacola-bound.

00:20:31.060 --> 00:20:33.564
Walk off Grand Slam!

00:20:35.534 --> 00:20:40.494
Barons win the title by a run.

00:20:40.494 --> 00:20:42.126
Hm-hm!

00:20:42.126 --> 00:20:44.641
Me and my crew,
we have to pass

00:20:44.641 --> 00:20:47.609
the Visitors' dugout
to exit the field.

00:20:47.609 --> 00:20:49.680
The losing pitcher
comes up behind me.

00:20:49.680 --> 00:20:52.671
"Hey! Lucky you don't have
an ERA, Blue.

00:20:52.671 --> 00:20:55.694
Those runs are yours!"

00:20:57.984 --> 00:20:58.910
So.

00:21:04.350 --> 00:21:06.990
So we have a game
the next day.

00:21:06.990 --> 00:21:11.198
No time to shower.
We have to go to Jackson.

00:21:11.198 --> 00:21:15.391
We pile into the van,
Jason behind the wheel.

00:21:15.391 --> 00:21:18.789
[Sings] "Sky rockets in flight!
Afternoon -- "

00:21:20.099 --> 00:21:23.214
Jason starts to dig in.

00:21:23.214 --> 00:21:28.542
"Hey, Rico.
That 2 strike call on Morales.

00:21:28.542 --> 00:21:30.878
That was strike 3."

00:21:30.878 --> 00:21:32.558
"Jason," I said.

00:21:32.558 --> 00:21:36.830
"That ball was so far outside,
it had a hat and a coat on.

00:21:36.830 --> 00:21:38.862
Could you turn it down a bit?"

00:21:38.862 --> 00:21:41.966
I look in the back, 
at Roosevelt, for some support.

00:21:41.966 --> 00:21:45.630
Roosevelt is aiming
his iPhone at us.

00:21:45.630 --> 00:21:51.134
Another chapter in his
on the road documentary.

00:21:52.484 --> 00:21:55.040
Jason digs in deeper.

00:21:55.040 --> 00:21:58.190
"Hey, Rico.
You -- You Latinos


00:21:58.190 --> 00:22:00.606
look out after each other,
don'tcha?

00:22:00.606 --> 00:22:04.063
What, did Morales
slip you some pesos?

00:22:04.063 --> 00:22:08.845
Huh? Huh? One gone call
tips the championship.

00:22:08.845 --> 00:22:12.558
I thought only horses
slept standing up."

00:22:12.558 --> 00:22:15.443
"Alright, Jason. That's enough."

00:22:17.073 --> 00:22:23.907
"You guys," Roosevelt says,
"been goin' at it for 4 solid months.

00:22:23.907 --> 00:22:29.602
Since opening day. Why don't you both
settle it like men?"

00:22:30.782 --> 00:22:34.096
"Just a minute, here. Just a minute."

00:22:34.096 --> 00:22:37.494
Hey -- gimme another 7 and 7, huh?

00:22:38.894 --> 00:22:40.176
Anyway --

00:22:40.176 --> 00:22:45.375
I'm trying every umpire's trick
to NOT listen.

00:22:45.375 --> 00:22:47.612
One more game left!

00:22:48.382 --> 00:22:52.846
And then I notice.
We're going in a circle.

00:22:52.846 --> 00:22:56.462
I say "Jason, you do have
the directions? Right?"

00:22:56.462 --> 00:23:01.124
And he says, Jason says,
"Uh, I ran out of rolling papers."

00:23:01.124 --> 00:23:04.223
"Uh, built me a doobie
out of the directions."

00:23:04.223 --> 00:23:06.430
"Up in smoke!"

00:23:06.430 --> 00:23:10.478
I said, "Jason, go straight
at the lights, turn right.

00:23:10.478 --> 00:23:15.873
That will lead you onto 
highway 20 on ramp to Atlanta."

00:23:16.533 --> 00:23:18.942
"Man who doesn't know his way
around a strike zone,

00:23:18.942 --> 00:23:20.782
giving me directions?"

00:23:20.782 --> 00:23:26.111
"Hmmm. Hey! Slip me some pesos,
and I'll consider it."

00:23:26.111 --> 00:23:29.023
"Hey Rico! Next time
you're behind the dish,

00:23:29.023 --> 00:23:32.838
bend over. 
Call the game with your good eye."

00:23:33.808 --> 00:23:37.695
Roosevelt is breaking up
in the back seat.

00:23:37.695 --> 00:23:44.351
"Four solid months. You two
should form a comedy team."

00:23:44.351 --> 00:23:48.958
"Ahh, getting caught in a 
wetback conspiracy, Roosevelt

00:23:48.958 --> 00:23:51.358
is no laughing matter."

00:23:51.358 --> 00:23:54.782
"Hey, maybe -- maybe Rico
would call a more accurate game,

00:23:54.782 --> 00:23:58.223
if home plate were shaped like
a tortilla."

00:23:59.633 --> 00:24:01.997
I'm staying cool.

00:24:01.997 --> 00:24:07.598
"Hey Rico! Yo Rico, I'm your daddy.
Hitchhiked to Salinas once,

00:24:07.598 --> 00:24:11.376
and [bleeped] your mother,
in a lettuce field."

00:24:11.376 --> 00:24:14.382
"OK. OK, Jason.
One more crack,

00:24:14.382 --> 00:24:16.766
I'll wreck your career."

00:24:16.766 --> 00:24:20.975
"Crack? Your mamacita's
tasted like guacamole."

00:24:20.975 --> 00:24:23.566
"Whoa, you gonna take that,
Rico?"

00:24:23.566 --> 00:24:26.191
"I just about had enough
of you, Rico.

00:24:26.191 --> 00:24:28.398
Let's settle this like men."

00:24:28.398 --> 00:24:31.229
Jasmine is blowing through
our minds.

00:24:31.229 --> 00:24:35.376
Jason pulls the van over,
under the streetlight.

00:24:35.376 --> 00:24:38.093
He rips open the driver's door.

00:24:38.093 --> 00:24:40.766
Races around
the back of the van.

00:24:40.766 --> 00:24:43.390
And I've got blood in my eyes.

00:24:43.390 --> 00:24:46.669
He yanks open the passenger door,

00:24:46.669 --> 00:24:51.726
and before he could remove his hand,
I clocked him, with a solid left to the jaw.

00:24:51.726 --> 00:24:54.429
Jason grabs my arm,
and the Oklahoma farm boy

00:24:54.429 --> 00:24:57.887
swings me out, 
under the street light.

00:24:57.887 --> 00:25:00.462
We are tussling like wildcats.

00:25:00.462 --> 00:25:03.326
The guy has got 100 pounds on me.

00:25:03.326 --> 00:25:07.200
Roosevelt is filming the whole thing
on his iPhone.

00:25:09.470 --> 00:25:11.934
Thirty seconds later...

00:25:11.934 --> 00:25:13.527
it's over.

00:25:14.127 --> 00:25:16.193
We get back in the van,

00:25:16.193 --> 00:25:19.597
and pull into Jacksonville,
just before dawn.

00:25:19.597 --> 00:25:22.942
Not a word spoken
the whole way.

00:25:24.462 --> 00:25:28.109
A week later,
our little altercation

00:25:28.109 --> 00:25:29.726
shows up on You Tube.

00:25:30.336 --> 00:25:32.899
"Posted anonymously."

00:25:33.869 --> 00:25:35.909
ESPN runs it.

00:25:36.959 --> 00:25:42.045
Jason and I are released.

00:25:42.045 --> 00:25:45.134
Fired.

00:25:45.134 --> 00:25:50.414
Roosevelt's on his way
to the Big Show.

00:25:50.414 --> 00:25:54.366
What am I gonna do here?

00:25:54.366 --> 00:25:56.797
What am I gonna do.

00:25:58.307 --> 00:26:10.323
[Applause.]

00:26:33.293 --> 00:26:40.561
[Peppy guitars.]

00:26:40.561 --> 00:26:43.646
[Sings] I did not rise up
from the mire

00:26:43.646 --> 00:26:46.637
to be cast into 
the lake of fire.

00:26:46.637 --> 00:26:49.551
I am proud to be
an outlaw.

00:26:49.551 --> 00:26:54.110
What I am 
is plain to God.

00:26:54.110 --> 00:26:57.149
Doesn't matter
what you sacrificed.

00:26:57.149 --> 00:27:01.245
We'll all appear before the
judgment seat of Christ.

00:27:01.245 --> 00:27:04.749
[Guitars]

00:27:04.749 --> 00:27:07.844
I did not rise up
from the mire

00:27:07.844 --> 00:27:10.944
to be cast into
the lake of fire.

00:27:10.944 --> 00:27:13.918
Live by faith,
not by sight.

00:27:13.918 --> 00:27:18.109
All that's mortal
swallowed up by life.

00:27:18.109 --> 00:27:21.437
So that each of us
will receive

00:27:21.437 --> 00:27:24.413
what is due us,
wheat or chaff.

00:27:24.413 --> 00:27:27.325
For all the things done
while in the body

00:27:27.325 --> 00:27:29.565
whether good or bad.

00:27:29.565 --> 00:27:32.030
[Guitars]

00:27:32.030 --> 00:27:34.893
The Kingdom soon will come.

00:27:34.893 --> 00:27:38.141
Exploding with the sun.

00:27:38.141 --> 00:27:41.213
All my loved ones
melding into one,

00:27:41.213 --> 00:27:43.359
'cause the kingdom
soon will come.

00:27:43.359 --> 00:27:55.261
[Guitar scales duo]

00:27:55.261 --> 00:27:58.253
I did not rise up
from the mire

00:27:58.253 --> 00:28:01.214
to be cast into
the lake of fire.

00:28:01.214 --> 00:28:04.029
I will live forever more.

00:28:04.029 --> 00:28:06.589
On the Armageddon shore.

00:28:06.589 --> 00:28:09.197
[Guitars]

00:28:09.197 --> 00:28:11.853
Seven seals,
Seven trumpets.

00:28:11.853 --> 00:28:14.877
Seven vials,
Seven cursed digits.

00:28:14.877 --> 00:28:17.901
Seven dooms,
Seven new things.

00:28:17.901 --> 00:28:19.725
For the angels.

00:28:19.725 --> 00:28:22.365
[Guitars]

00:28:22.365 --> 00:28:25.438
I did not rise up
from the mire

00:28:25.438 --> 00:28:28.573
to be cast into
the lake of fire.

00:28:28.573 --> 00:28:31.567
I am proud to be
an outlaw.

00:28:31.567 --> 00:28:33.069
What I am...

00:28:33.069 --> 00:28:37.070
is plain...to...God.
[Guitar strum]

00:28:37.070 --> 00:28:42.710
[Applause]

00:28:52.270 --> 00:28:58.718
[Loud Howls]

00:28:58.718 --> 00:29:06.205
[Panicked breathing]
[Bell ringing]

00:29:06.205 --> 00:29:08.913
You really did it this time, Harriet.

00:29:08.913 --> 00:29:11.965
Just had to leave the fold,
didn't you?

00:29:11.965 --> 00:29:15.581
You had it all.
Plenty of green grass,

00:29:15.581 --> 00:29:17.773
a haircut every spring.

00:29:17.773 --> 00:29:20.229
Three swell dogs,
and the friendliest shepherd

00:29:20.229 --> 00:29:22.909
this side of Bo Peep.

00:29:22.909 --> 00:29:26.573
Real friendly.
Was old Harriet satisfied?

00:29:26.573 --> 00:29:29.069
Nooo. [Bleats]
[Audience laughs]

00:29:29.069 --> 00:29:33.117
Had to leave the herd!
Big tough gal, huh, Harriet?

00:29:33.117 --> 00:29:35.165
[Wolf howls]

00:29:35.165 --> 00:29:36.701
What am I gonna do?

00:29:36.701 --> 00:29:40.433
[Wolf howls]

00:29:40.433 --> 00:29:45.805
[Wolf laughs]
Alright, mutton head.

00:29:45.805 --> 00:29:53.071
Where ya be? [Sniffs around]
I knows you out here somewheres.

00:29:55.181 --> 00:30:01.422
Hoo! All this runnin' 'round
makes a fella dog-tired.

00:30:01.422 --> 00:30:06.494
Why don't I just lay these bones 
up against this here boulder,

00:30:06.494 --> 00:30:08.599
and catch my breath?

00:30:12.719 --> 00:30:18.749
[Wolf sighs] Heyyy.
That feels nice-like.

00:30:18.749 --> 00:30:21.676
Wonder where my dinner
ran off to?

00:30:21.676 --> 00:30:24.685
Probably cowering
behind one of these rocks.

00:30:24.685 --> 00:30:27.950
I'll catch her.
And when I do!

00:30:27.950 --> 00:30:30.877
Should I make it...
mutton stew?

00:30:30.877 --> 00:30:35.533
Or leg o' lamb,
or just eat her raw?

00:30:35.533 --> 00:30:40.079
Mutton! Ain't had no sheep
for the whole month!

00:30:40.079 --> 00:30:42.221
That's gonna be really nice.

00:30:42.221 --> 00:30:45.814
Whoo! Brings out the beast in me.

00:30:47.374 --> 00:30:52.173
[Wolf pants]
Zippedy-doo-da!

00:30:52.173 --> 00:30:55.261
Zip! [Sheep yelps]
Ah-dee-ay!

00:30:55.261 --> 00:31:00.534
My, oh, my!
What a wonderful day!

00:31:00.534 --> 00:31:01.814
[Wolf smugly chuckles]

00:31:01.814 --> 00:31:06.301
Plenty o' moonshine
headin' MY way!

00:31:06.301 --> 00:31:11.209
Oh-ho-ho yeah-eh!
Oh-ho, YEAH-eh!

00:31:11.209 --> 00:31:15.281
[Howls loudly]

00:31:16.141 --> 00:31:21.006
Hey, what's this?
A earthquake?

00:31:21.006 --> 00:31:25.646
Wellllllll, I'll be.
That you, mutton head?

00:31:25.646 --> 00:31:29.229
Ohhh! Please, Mr. Wolf.
Go find someone else.

00:31:29.229 --> 00:31:31.780
I was just out strolling,
munching clover...

00:31:31.780 --> 00:31:34.094
That's enough of that,
little girl.

00:31:34.094 --> 00:31:37.086
How many times you been warned
'bout movin' out on your own?

00:31:37.086 --> 00:31:42.494
Look. I only eat the old, 
and the sick.

00:31:42.494 --> 00:31:44.873
I got my code.

00:31:44.873 --> 00:31:46.621
So gimme a break with 
the sob story,

00:31:46.621 --> 00:31:48.686
'cause I ain't ate 
in a week, little girl.

00:31:48.686 --> 00:31:50.605
Don't call me that!

00:31:50.605 --> 00:31:54.654
I may be on the meek side,
but I am not little.

00:31:54.654 --> 00:31:56.481
Maybe I will end up
in your belly.

00:31:56.481 --> 00:32:00.333
BUT! Not before
I account for myself.

00:32:00.333 --> 00:32:04.506
[Bell rings]

00:32:06.716 --> 00:32:08.402
[Wolf laughs]

00:32:08.402 --> 00:32:10.748
Now, don't that 
beat all!

00:32:10.748 --> 00:32:13.612
Full moon's got in your
blood too, eh little lady?

00:32:13.612 --> 00:32:16.864
Yeah! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

00:32:16.864 --> 00:32:18.605
[Wolf laughs mockingly]

00:32:18.605 --> 00:32:20.733
A fightin' back.
Well I'll be darned.

00:32:20.733 --> 00:32:21.641
Ow!

00:32:22.781 --> 00:32:26.189
Oh I didn't mean it!
Oh, please don't get mad.

00:32:26.189 --> 00:32:28.893
Ow! You little moron!

00:32:28.893 --> 00:32:33.282
Don'tcha know
you could get hurt doin' that?

00:32:33.282 --> 00:32:35.277
I dunno what's come over me.

00:32:35.277 --> 00:32:36.448
[Wolf grunts and groans]

00:32:36.448 --> 00:32:39.148
One day I'm munching clover,
and the next, I'm --

00:32:39.148 --> 00:32:42.141
pugilizing with canis lupus.

00:32:42.141 --> 00:32:45.748
Pugilizin'?! Sounds weird.

00:32:45.748 --> 00:32:49.037
Tradin' blows?
Fisticuffs?

00:32:49.037 --> 00:32:52.045
Tusslin'? Dukin' it out?
Goin' ten --

00:32:52.045 --> 00:32:54.876
Alright! Enough with the words!

00:32:54.876 --> 00:32:57.852
You gonna make a run for it,
or what?

00:32:57.852 --> 00:32:59.964
I got important things
to attend to!

00:32:59.964 --> 00:33:02.636
With very important wolves.

00:33:04.926 --> 00:33:07.244
You're kidding.

00:33:07.244 --> 00:33:08.861
Whatta ya mean? 
Whatta ya mean?

00:33:08.861 --> 00:33:10.417
I tell ya, I'm in a hurry.

00:33:10.417 --> 00:33:13.373
Why, me and some friends,
I -- I --

00:33:13.373 --> 00:33:14.413
What? What's wrong?

00:33:14.413 --> 00:33:16.932
Nothin'! Gol-durn it.

00:33:16.932 --> 00:33:20.109
What? What about your friends?
Is something wrong?

00:33:20.109 --> 00:33:22.380
Full moon's got me talkin' funny.

00:33:22.380 --> 00:33:25.301
No, no, something's wrong.
I can sense it.

00:33:25.301 --> 00:33:27.598
I'm very attuned
to the emotional manifestations

00:33:27.598 --> 00:33:30.732
of my fellow beings.
Something's awry.

00:33:30.732 --> 00:33:32.723
Nothin' crunchin' your bones 
won't fix!

00:33:32.723 --> 00:33:35.964
Your friends?
What about your friends?

00:33:35.964 --> 00:33:38.481
Big Shots.
Every one o' them.

00:33:38.481 --> 00:33:40.256
Leaders of the pack!

00:33:40.256 --> 00:33:41.628
Take me with you!

00:33:41.628 --> 00:33:44.062
Oh, this is the adventure
I've always dreamed of!

00:33:44.062 --> 00:33:49.249
Shee-oot! What's this
gol-dang world coming to?

00:33:49.249 --> 00:33:52.668
Now, listen.
If you don't start runnin' or fightin'

00:33:52.668 --> 00:33:57.116
right quick, I'm gonna get ornery.
Then you'll really be sorry!

00:33:57.116 --> 00:33:59.757
It's your last chance!

00:33:59.757 --> 00:34:02.204
Let me meet 'em.
I can tell 'em some

00:34:02.204 --> 00:34:04.412
friendly shepherd jokes.

00:34:04.412 --> 00:34:06.380
I got this one about an
'embraceable ewe'

00:34:06.380 --> 00:34:08.926
that'll put 'em in stitches.

00:34:08.926 --> 00:34:13.582
Alright, alright, alright.
I know when my leg's being pulled.

00:34:13.582 --> 00:34:16.832
Now, look.
If I brought you back with me,

00:34:16.832 --> 00:34:19.293
well, I'd get laughed out
of the pack.

00:34:20.073 --> 00:34:23.036
You're afraid to be alone?

00:34:23.036 --> 00:34:27.053
Big stud wolf,
afraid to be alone?

00:34:27.053 --> 00:34:31.325
Can't face up to his own
reflection in the watering hole?

00:34:31.325 --> 00:34:32.882
I am alone!


00:34:32.882 --> 00:34:35.809
I ain't got no friends, OK?
Ya happy now?

00:34:35.809 --> 00:34:40.269
I was kicked out for in -- uh --
in -- uh --

00:34:40.269 --> 00:34:43.004
infedulity!

00:34:43.764 --> 00:34:46.109
Infidelity?

00:34:46.109 --> 00:34:49.164
Yep. She's not my woman.

00:34:49.164 --> 00:34:52.318
All wolves in the wild are women,
normally.

00:34:52.318 --> 00:34:58.157
But, when the pups came along,
it was bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch.

00:34:58.157 --> 00:35:01.260
The good times stopped,
and one thing led to another,

00:35:01.260 --> 00:35:06.400
and one night, I raised a ruckus
with one of the younger ones.

00:35:06.400 --> 00:35:09.464
Got thrown out on my ear.

00:35:10.124 --> 00:35:14.301
You're an outsider.
A 'lone wolf.'

00:35:14.301 --> 00:35:16.828
As lonely as they come.

00:35:18.678 --> 00:35:20.397
Oh, I get it!

00:35:20.397 --> 00:35:23.792
Tryin' to get on my good side,
with sympathy, aren't ya?

00:35:23.792 --> 00:35:25.404
Hey, I'm onto you, sweetheart!

00:35:25.404 --> 00:35:29.789
You gotta get up pretty early
in the mornin' to fool ol' Loopy.

00:35:29.789 --> 00:35:31.900
Darn, I told ya my name!

00:35:31.900 --> 00:35:33.693
Why'd I go and 
tell you my name?

00:35:33.693 --> 00:35:35.020
Short for Guadalupe?

00:35:35.020 --> 00:35:38.557
No, Loopy. Like....

00:35:38.557 --> 00:35:40.751
Hi. I'm Harriet.

00:35:42.821 --> 00:35:44.782
And you're an outlaw.

00:35:44.782 --> 00:35:49.405
A savage desert denizen,
traveling fast -- traveling light.

00:35:49.405 --> 00:35:51.966
Asking and giving no quarter.

00:35:51.966 --> 00:35:55.790
Content to let the buffalo chips
fall where they may.

00:35:55.790 --> 00:35:58.604
Taking as it comes, day by day.

00:35:58.604 --> 00:36:02.013
Your only friend: your wily wolf wit.

00:36:02.013 --> 00:36:05.005
I've always admired your kind, Loopy!

00:36:05.005 --> 00:36:09.452
Why, in my younger years,
I rather fancied myself a black sheep.

00:36:09.452 --> 00:36:12.172
Sort of a...maverick in mohair?

00:36:12.172 --> 00:36:15.901
Marching to the tinkle of my own bell?

00:36:16.681 --> 00:36:20.738
'Til one day it all went grey,
and I settled in.

00:36:21.358 --> 00:36:23.197
You told me YOUR name?!

00:36:23.197 --> 00:36:25.709
Why'd you have to go and 
tell me YOUR name?!

00:36:25.709 --> 00:36:27.734
Victuals ain't got no name.

00:36:27.734 --> 00:36:29.252
[Vulture caws]

00:36:29.252 --> 00:36:30.784
What's that?!

00:36:30.784 --> 00:36:31.788
What's what?

00:36:32.518 --> 00:36:33.797
[Vulture caws]

00:36:33.797 --> 00:36:35.484
Stop that noise!

00:36:35.484 --> 00:36:37.804
Oh, THAT noise. 
Just --

00:36:37.804 --> 00:36:38.924
[Vulture caws]

00:36:38.924 --> 00:36:40.437
a garden variety
turkey vulture.

00:36:40.437 --> 00:36:41.634
Don't be scared.

00:36:41.634 --> 00:36:42.636
[Vulture caws]

00:36:42.636 --> 00:36:44.757
Vultures have never 
attacked anything alive.

00:36:44.757 --> 00:36:46.828
No he waits in line,
all polite-like, 'til

00:36:46.828 --> 00:36:49.404
the original killers
have had our fill.

00:36:49.404 --> 00:36:52.853
Then, after I slink off
and let Mr. Stomach do his job,

00:36:52.853 --> 00:36:54.259
on the FRESH meat --

00:36:54.259 --> 00:36:55.549
[Vulture caws]

00:36:55.549 --> 00:36:59.836
them vultures fill their entrails
on the carcass.

00:36:59.836 --> 00:37:02.972
Only when the stench of the
rotten flesh will make a horse fly puke

00:37:02.972 --> 00:37:06.414
does your vulture move in.

00:37:06.414 --> 00:37:09.772
See? Everybody's
got his way of doin' things.

00:37:09.772 --> 00:37:12.204
Relaaaaax.

00:37:12.204 --> 00:37:15.052
That vulture don't concern you.

00:37:15.052 --> 00:37:16.541
YET.

00:37:20.161 --> 00:37:23.650
Loopy? I love you.

00:37:23.650 --> 00:37:27.142
Love? LOVE?!

00:37:27.142 --> 00:37:28.404
Come on, girl!

00:37:28.404 --> 00:37:31.404
That's just your way of saying
you think you're better than me.

00:37:31.404 --> 00:37:33.148
That's not true!

00:37:33.148 --> 00:37:36.076
You have many --
fine qualities.

00:37:36.076 --> 00:37:38.220
Courageous hunter?

00:37:38.220 --> 00:37:40.508
Intrepid explorer?

00:37:40.508 --> 00:37:42.306
Rugged individualist?

00:37:42.306 --> 00:37:43.356
- Hmm --

00:37:43.356 --> 00:37:46.455
The frontier spirit incarnate.

00:37:46.455 --> 00:37:47.484
Why, with --

00:37:47.484 --> 00:37:50.476
with just a few lessons
in philosophy,

00:37:50.476 --> 00:37:53.356
in etiquette,
in personal hygiene --

00:37:53.356 --> 00:37:54.540
- I think it --

00:37:54.540 --> 00:37:57.185
[GROWLS ANGRILY]

00:37:58.165 --> 00:38:00.861
No, hy-GIENE.

00:38:00.861 --> 00:38:02.541
Cleanliness?

00:38:02.541 --> 00:38:04.286
Which is next to Godliness?

00:38:04.286 --> 00:38:06.269
Except with you, 
it's next to impossible.

00:38:06.269 --> 00:38:07.308
[Wolf growls]

00:38:07.308 --> 00:38:08.508
Anyway!

00:38:08.508 --> 00:38:11.580
With just a few lessons --
in rhetoric, in elocution.

00:38:11.580 --> 00:38:14.268
And a dash -- 
just a teensy dash --

00:38:14.268 --> 00:38:16.844
of political analysis thrown in.

00:38:16.844 --> 00:38:19.436
Incisive, five week --

00:38:19.436 --> 00:38:20.876
Alright!

00:38:20.876 --> 00:38:23.052
Listen, fleece bag.

00:38:23.052 --> 00:38:25.756
My empty stomach says
tea time is over.

00:38:25.756 --> 00:38:29.051
Let's cut the chit chat,
and proceed to the heart of the menu.

00:38:29.051 --> 00:38:32.124
Move! Make a run for it,
before I lose my temper

00:38:32.124 --> 00:38:34.091
and get VIOLENT!

00:38:46.221 --> 00:38:48.299
I've been outfoxed.

00:38:48.299 --> 00:38:50.605
I can run no more.

00:38:50.605 --> 00:38:52.861
I'm big enough to admit
to your superiority

00:38:52.861 --> 00:38:54.860
in the scheme of things.

00:38:54.860 --> 00:38:59.788
Crush these feeble limbs
in your bear-trap jaws.

00:38:59.788 --> 00:39:03.226
Better this, than to grow flabby
in some meadow.

00:39:03.226 --> 00:39:04.988
Do me this favor.

00:39:04.988 --> 00:39:07.900
Son of a...buzzard.

00:39:07.900 --> 00:39:09.244
Please!

00:39:09.244 --> 00:39:11.965
End my squalid existence.

00:39:11.965 --> 00:39:14.976
Make wolf-flesh of my marrow.

00:39:14.976 --> 00:39:19.291
Gorge on me, that I may be
transformed.

00:39:19.291 --> 00:39:22.884
But! What's in it for you?

00:39:23.874 --> 00:39:26.781
Immediate gratification?
And then what?

00:39:26.781 --> 00:39:29.708
Inside of a week,
you'll be on the prowl again.

00:39:29.708 --> 00:39:36.284
A pathetic slobbering beast
with only one thing on its tiny mind.

00:39:36.284 --> 00:39:40.011
Enslaved by a hunger 
which has no end.

00:39:40.011 --> 00:39:43.291
All I wanted was a square meal.

00:39:43.291 --> 00:39:46.267
Ohhhh.
Loopy, I love you.

00:39:46.267 --> 00:39:48.027
I want to help you.

00:39:48.027 --> 00:39:52.027
The only way you could help me
would be by committin' suicide

00:39:52.027 --> 00:39:54.923
and servin' yourself up on a platter!

00:39:54.923 --> 00:39:57.244
Loopy, I know things.

00:39:57.244 --> 00:40:00.476
All those years in the sweet
and boring clover,

00:40:00.476 --> 00:40:04.092
I was thinking!
Watching the sun rise,

00:40:04.092 --> 00:40:06.198
and set,
sniffing the blue air.

00:40:08.478 --> 00:40:09.598
[Wolf sniffs loudly]

00:40:09.598 --> 00:40:11.724
Seeing the stars at night.

00:40:11.724 --> 00:40:13.788
Feeling the change of the seasons.

00:40:13.788 --> 00:40:20.409
White winters huddled in the barn.
Green springtime. Blazing summer.

00:40:20.409 --> 00:40:25.137
Smoky autumn. All the while,
I'm thinking.

00:40:25.137 --> 00:40:28.572
I started wondering why
everything is the way it is.

00:40:28.572 --> 00:40:32.764
And, the more I wondered why
the less I saw the majesty around me.

00:40:32.764 --> 00:40:35.645
But I couldn't stop the wondering!

00:40:35.645 --> 00:40:42.685
One day, as the little ones
were led off to the blade, it hit me.

00:40:42.685 --> 00:40:43.948
It hit ya?

00:40:43.948 --> 00:40:45.644
The reason for everything!

00:40:45.644 --> 00:40:47.455
Huh?

00:40:47.455 --> 00:40:49.963
Why we're here.

00:40:49.963 --> 00:40:54.972
Why these rocks are hard
and still warm, even as moonshine

00:40:54.972 --> 00:40:56.588
coats them in silver.

00:40:56.588 --> 00:40:59.594
Why meadow grass
is green and slick.

00:40:59.594 --> 00:41:02.444
Why rain and snow make rivers.

00:41:02.444 --> 00:41:04.732
Why wolves love mutton?

00:41:04.732 --> 00:41:06.287
Why wolves love mutton.

00:41:06.287 --> 00:41:08.252
And why you won't eat me.

00:41:09.242 --> 00:41:10.075
I won't?

00:41:10.075 --> 00:41:11.983
Nope! You won't.

00:41:11.983 --> 00:41:19.143
But -- if I eat you, wouldn't I
automatically know these things?

00:41:19.563 --> 00:41:22.492
I hear flatworms do it that way.

00:41:22.492 --> 00:41:27.211
One of the elders of the pack
was tellin' us about a "experiment"

00:41:27.211 --> 00:41:31.259
he heard about. Seems that some
flatworms was trained to

00:41:31.259 --> 00:41:36.523
wiggle through a maze, to get some food.
Then, they was ground up into

00:41:36.523 --> 00:41:41.451
tiny chunks of meat,
and fed to some baby flatworms.

00:41:41.451 --> 00:41:45.308
First thing ya know,
them babies is negotiatin' that maze

00:41:45.308 --> 00:41:51.292
like they was born to it.
One generation feedin' the next.

00:41:51.292 --> 00:41:56.036
So I was wonderin' -- if I eat you,
[Harriet yelps]

00:41:56.036 --> 00:41:58.960
won't I know these things?

00:41:58.960 --> 00:42:02.395
[Harriet laughs uneasily]
Sorry.

00:42:03.515 --> 00:42:06.844
You're a wolf, and I'm a sheep.

00:42:06.844 --> 00:42:11.275
I will not allow the blow to your
self-esteem, of comparing yourself

00:42:11.275 --> 00:42:15.773
to a mere 
[scientific word for flatworm.]

00:42:15.773 --> 00:42:18.491
Loopy! We're not worms.

00:42:18.491 --> 00:42:21.511
Okay! So why we here?
And why do wolves love mutton?

00:42:21.511 --> 00:42:23.659
I don't know that you're
sophisticated enough

00:42:23.659 --> 00:42:25.131
to understand that just yet.

00:42:25.131 --> 00:42:28.971
That's enough! I have sat through
your tales too long!

00:42:28.971 --> 00:42:33.131
My guts are howlin' louder than
Uncle Louie at the last eclipse.

00:42:33.131 --> 00:42:34.795
I know why there are eclipses!

00:42:34.795 --> 00:42:38.686
I don't give a hoot why!
[Whooshing sound]

00:42:38.686 --> 00:42:43.852
[Wolf whimpers]
What was that?!

00:42:45.392 --> 00:42:49.965
I know why the stars are
faaaaallllliiiiinnnnng!

00:42:49.965 --> 00:42:51.040
Why?!

00:42:51.040 --> 00:42:53.489
Why, I'd need at least a week
to explain it to you.

00:42:53.489 --> 00:42:57.755
Oh, you're stallin'!
[Thunder sounds]

00:42:57.755 --> 00:43:00.155
[Wolf whimpers]
[Sheep snickers]

00:43:00.155 --> 00:43:02.257
[Wolf] What's goin' on?

00:43:02.852 --> 00:43:05.072
[Wolf panting]

00:43:05.072 --> 00:43:06.492
[Sheep yelps] Oooh! Stop!

00:43:06.492 --> 00:43:10.795
Move no closer!
Just...keep...pursuing me...

00:43:10.795 --> 00:43:12.395
hungry.

00:43:12.395 --> 00:43:18.124
Keep your beautiful savagery.
May your jaws always drip.

00:43:18.124 --> 00:43:22.059
Desire is a beautiful thing, 
Loopy.

00:43:22.059 --> 00:43:27.084
Eat me now, and you'll be hungry
tomorrow, with no one to talk to.

00:43:27.084 --> 00:43:30.735
Keep me alive, and you can want me
forever.

00:43:30.735 --> 00:43:33.727
Oh, Loopy, we can do it.
Let's be friends!

00:43:34.517 --> 00:43:40.331
I -- I -- am hungry.
I eat.

00:43:40.331 --> 00:43:43.723
You are pink and tender.

00:43:43.723 --> 00:43:48.347
My fur bristles.
I drool. I eat!

00:43:48.347 --> 00:43:51.403
You'll stay as you are,
forever wolf.

00:43:51.403 --> 00:43:53.163
Let me civilize you!

00:43:53.163 --> 00:43:56.523
[Wolf grunts] My body 
howls for you!

00:43:56.523 --> 00:43:58.699
What of the heavens,
dear wolf?

00:43:58.699 --> 00:44:09.547
[Whooshing sound]
[Distant thunder]

00:44:09.547 --> 00:44:12.588
You won't distract me
with your talkin'.

00:44:12.588 --> 00:44:17.403
So, you've run with horses, have you?
Enough!

00:44:17.403 --> 00:44:21.525
Run! Fight!
Account for yourself.

00:44:21.525 --> 00:44:23.132
You ask alien things.

00:44:23.132 --> 00:44:25.739
Why not entreat
these rocks to sing?

00:44:25.739 --> 00:44:28.251
You're a cunning one,
and a coward.

00:44:28.251 --> 00:44:30.940
[Sheep gasps] A thirst slaked
by a coward's blood

00:44:30.940 --> 00:44:32.795
would leave you parched, yes?

00:44:32.795 --> 00:44:34.316
[Wolf] You're not worth it!

00:44:34.316 --> 00:44:39.659
Not worth it?!
I offer you eternal desire!

00:44:39.659 --> 00:44:45.226
Friendship! [Exhales]
Big tough wolf. [Bell rings]

00:44:45.226 --> 00:44:46.680
I'll beat you, old Loopy.

00:44:46.680 --> 00:44:48.628
You don't wanna be my friend.
[Bell rings]

00:44:48.628 --> 00:44:51.105
You just wanna save your skin.
Make a fool out of me.

00:44:51.105 --> 00:44:52.651
[Bell rings] I got news for ya.

00:44:52.651 --> 00:44:55.321
You can walk a mile in my shoes,
and never fill my boots.

00:44:55.321 --> 00:44:58.210
Oh, sorry, Loopster.
Takes guts to be my pal.

00:44:58.210 --> 00:45:02.587
You just ain't got what it takes.
Call me what you want:

00:45:02.587 --> 00:45:06.619
Howl at the sun and call it the moon
if it makes you feel any better!

00:45:06.619 --> 00:45:09.387
[Sheep chokes, bell rings]

00:45:09.387 --> 00:45:13.259
[Wolf howls loudly]

00:45:13.259 --> 00:45:23.243
[Wolf laughs, bell rings]

00:45:23.243 --> 00:45:31.627
Your move...PAL.
[Wolf laughs]

00:45:31.627 --> 00:45:36.903
[Vulture caws]

00:45:41.083 --> 00:45:49.544
[Applause]

00:45:49.544 --> 00:45:52.699
[Acoustic guitar bridge]

00:45:52.699 --> 00:46:17.226
[Phrase repeats]

00:46:17.226 --> 00:46:23.019
I let out a primal scream
all the neighbors heard.

00:46:23.019 --> 00:46:28.811
I woke them up from their dreams
while their children stirred.

00:46:28.811 --> 00:46:34.411
I released a primal scream
ripped out from my core.

00:46:34.411 --> 00:46:43.210
All the slaughter I had seen,
I couldn't hold it any more.

00:46:43.210 --> 00:46:48.827
They look at me funny,
intrigued by what they see

00:46:48.827 --> 00:46:54.699
though my smile is sunny
when I pass by their children's feet.

00:46:54.699 --> 00:47:02.347
[Guitar phrase]

00:47:02.347 --> 00:47:08.027
I ripped out a primal scream
through the neighborhood.

00:47:08.027 --> 00:47:14.091
I did not do anything
like a neighbor should.

00:47:14.091 --> 00:47:19.131
I howled a primal scream,
sent lightning through the air.

00:47:19.131 --> 00:47:24.893
I'm better now than I do seem.
They don't really care.

00:47:24.893 --> 00:47:28.714
[Guitar flourish]

00:47:28.714 --> 00:47:34.027
They look at me funny,
intrigued by what they see

00:47:34.027 --> 00:47:40.043
though my smile is sunny
when I pass by their children's feet.

00:47:40.043 --> 00:47:47.355
[Guitar phrase]

00:47:47.355 --> 00:47:53.275
I let out a primal scream
all the neighbors heard.

00:47:53.275 --> 00:47:58.954
I woke them up from their dreams
while their children stirred.

00:47:58.954 --> 00:48:04.554
I released a primal scream
ripped out from my core.

00:48:04.554 --> 00:48:10.779
All the slaughter I have seen
I couldn't hold it any more.

00:48:10.779 --> 00:48:13.418
[Guitar flourish]

00:48:13.418 --> 00:48:17.611
[Guitar phrase]

00:48:17.611 --> 00:48:20.747
Christopher Lopez.
All the way from Greenfield California.

00:48:20.747 --> 00:48:33.350
[Applause]

00:49:00.330 --> 00:49:03.467
Who can shave an egg?

00:49:04.667 --> 00:49:07.130
[Irish accent]
You were born into a raw deal.

00:49:07.130 --> 00:49:11.375
It's not the detail.
Two decades' worth of therapy.

00:49:11.375 --> 00:49:16.778
Chalk it up to life on earth.
Everybody pays.

00:49:16.778 --> 00:49:21.530
We're responsible for investing
our lives with meaning.

00:49:21.530 --> 00:49:28.405
You make vengeance your god,
saieth you, you who are.

00:49:29.995 --> 00:49:33.564
You can't hide an eel in a sack.

00:49:33.564 --> 00:49:39.530
The man deserves what he got, huh?
He was fat. Jabba the Hut rotund.

00:49:39.530 --> 00:49:43.178
He lied in court.
He suborned perjury.

00:49:43.178 --> 00:49:47.644
Then got a restrainin' order.
They took away your gun.

00:49:47.644 --> 00:49:53.261
Well, ya had some new songs.
Ya found a studio in the Yellow Pages.

00:49:53.261 --> 00:49:56.747
This was when digital was
replacing analog.

00:49:56.747 --> 00:50:02.842
He lied to you, that his
Roland 680 was state of the art.

00:50:02.842 --> 00:50:06.907
You later learned it was
only fit for home demos.

00:50:06.907 --> 00:50:10.746
He set up the studio
in his home rec room.

00:50:10.746 --> 00:50:13.963
He said he'd back up
each day's work.

00:50:13.963 --> 00:50:18.510
After three months
in the fat man's studio,

00:50:18.510 --> 00:50:22.722
he erased an instrumental track.
He made a big show of

00:50:22.722 --> 00:50:25.627
punchin' buttons,
and he swiveled around,

00:50:25.627 --> 00:50:29.194
and said he couldn't
find it in his backup files.

00:50:29.194 --> 00:50:32.202
There were no backup files.

00:50:32.202 --> 00:50:37.530
You decided to mix everything
as fast as possible, then get out

00:50:37.530 --> 00:50:42.127
if other bits turned up missing.
You extracted what you could,

00:50:42.127 --> 00:50:45.081
and sent the fat man
a [?]

00:50:46.731 --> 00:50:50.586
Prompted by his attorney,
he asked the Judge,

00:50:50.586 --> 00:50:56.443
"Why, if he was so incompetent,
you spent 3 months in his studio?"

00:50:56.443 --> 00:50:59.278
Well, you replied
that you recorded all the material

00:50:59.278 --> 00:51:02.016
before you mixed it.
And so you didn't learn

00:51:02.016 --> 00:51:04.532
about the fraud 
until much later.

00:51:04.532 --> 00:51:07.678
The fat man brought in
a psychiatrist.

00:51:07.678 --> 00:51:10.267
[German accent]
Who analyzed your lyrics.

00:51:10.267 --> 00:51:13.328
And testified that "someone
as sick as you should never

00:51:13.328 --> 00:51:16.432
have been allowed
into the fat man's home."

00:51:17.802 --> 00:51:21.130
[Irish accent] You printed up
2 dozen flyers,

00:51:21.130 --> 00:51:24.634
advertising the fat man's address
as a recording studio

00:51:24.634 --> 00:51:28.394
with an absurdly low hourly rate.

00:51:28.394 --> 00:51:34.139
Wearin' surgical gloves, ya papered
the black sections of Seaside.

00:51:34.139 --> 00:51:39.286
Next ya heard, a crackhead shot him
in a home invasion.

00:51:41.426 --> 00:51:44.446
It is hard for an empty bag
to sit upright.

00:51:44.446 --> 00:51:47.786
She...was...an actress.

00:51:47.786 --> 00:51:51.756
A refugee from Hollywood's 
enervatin' rituals.

00:51:51.756 --> 00:51:54.144
Workin' in a nearby record shop.

00:51:55.394 --> 00:52:01.678
By now, CDs were on their way out,
and only connoisseurs purchased vinyl.

00:52:01.678 --> 00:52:06.426
Some afternoons, you had her
all to yourself.

00:52:06.426 --> 00:52:09.258
When she mentioned her husband
in passing,

00:52:09.258 --> 00:52:12.062
you remarked that she wore no ring.

00:52:12.062 --> 00:52:16.702
"That's because I might be cast
as an unmarried woman," she said.

00:52:16.702 --> 00:52:20.000
"I can't even risk an indentation
on my finger."

00:52:20.000 --> 00:52:23.784
Oh-ho! The sacrifices we make for art.

00:52:25.114 --> 00:52:29.002
You reason that such a blemish
would not be visible at all on stage.

00:52:29.002 --> 00:52:33.578
You concluded that, consciously or not,
the real blemish on her life

00:52:33.578 --> 00:52:35.786
was her marriage.

00:52:36.236 --> 00:52:40.010
Now, actresses are always ready
to talk about themselves.

00:52:40.010 --> 00:52:43.573
It was therefore easy to learn
that her husband was

00:52:43.573 --> 00:52:50.534
4 years younger than she, and
somethin' of a psychological basket case.

00:52:51.834 --> 00:52:58.281
Takin' a break from his video games,
Chubby Hubby wandered in one foggy day,

00:52:58.281 --> 00:53:02.847
sayin' he needed her email password.

00:53:02.847 --> 00:53:06.571
Pullin' him by his elbow
into the British Invasion aisle,

00:53:06.571 --> 00:53:08.842
she told him no.

00:53:08.842 --> 00:53:14.338
Though you tried invisibility,
Chubby Hubby judged you

00:53:14.338 --> 00:53:18.013
to have witnessed his
emasculation.

00:53:18.013 --> 00:53:23.851
Glarin' at ya from below the brim
of his skull and bones festooned cap,

00:53:23.851 --> 00:53:30.090
the would-be cuckold said, sotto-voce,
"So. Who's the music lover?"

00:53:30.090 --> 00:53:33.498
"Call me Seattle Grant," you said,
extending your hand

00:53:33.498 --> 00:53:38.729
as he lumbered past ya
into misty Pacific Grove.

00:53:38.729 --> 00:53:41.370
[?] wife, busying herself,

00:53:41.370 --> 00:53:45.466
with Jerry and the Pacemakers'
Greatest Hits.

00:53:47.176 --> 00:53:50.582
To cut down an oak,
and set up a strawberry.

00:53:51.402 --> 00:53:57.262
With her permission, you use them
as a model, as would a painter.

00:53:58.522 --> 00:54:01.387
Except you spent no time together.

00:54:01.387 --> 00:54:06.314
You enrolled her as a concubine
in your imaginary harem.

00:54:06.314 --> 00:54:09.980
You were a kind and generous Sultan.

00:54:09.980 --> 00:54:14.555
On your wedding night,
you excused her lack of virginity,

00:54:14.555 --> 00:54:19.690
having suffered years of
phallic intrusion by Chubby Hubby.

00:54:19.690 --> 00:54:23.019
She wept.
You consoled her

00:54:23.019 --> 00:54:28.874
by composing the first of dozens of
adorational ballads to your muse.

00:54:30.144 --> 00:54:34.346
As time passed,
you'd enter the used record store, and

00:54:34.346 --> 00:54:41.002
covertly examine her face, her neck,
and her arms, for bruises

00:54:41.002 --> 00:54:45.785
or lacerations left by your
un[?] surrogate.

00:54:45.785 --> 00:54:51.776
She always passed inspection,
but you were certain he abused her.

00:54:52.746 --> 00:54:56.911
As your fantasy wife, she accompanied you
to Majorca,

00:54:56.911 --> 00:54:59.658
and other Mediterranean destinations.

00:54:59.658 --> 00:55:06.220
Ooh, there was a menage a trois in Ibiza.
An orgy in Algiers.

00:55:06.220 --> 00:55:13.289
She confessed that her pre-coital
fantasies of Arab men were not being met.

00:55:13.289 --> 00:55:15.930
Ya Googled her,

00:55:15.930 --> 00:55:19.962
and accumulated an
incremental biography.

00:55:19.962 --> 00:55:23.450
B. A. in Theater, some knockabout
years in Hollywood,

00:55:23.450 --> 00:55:28.166
before she followed a 
National Guardsman to Ford Ord.

00:55:29.126 --> 00:55:32.713
Nuptials were soon ruptured
by shock and awe.

00:55:32.713 --> 00:55:36.644
The war, not the wedding night.

00:55:38.824 --> 00:55:45.146
Chubby Hubby forged a discharge,
and they settled in Pacific Grove.

00:55:45.146 --> 00:55:49.002
She supported her 'acting habit' 
at the record store,

00:55:49.002 --> 00:55:52.849
while Chubby Hubby
"looked for a job."

00:55:53.659 --> 00:55:57.783
You confess.
You smell the discord.

00:55:58.743 --> 00:56:02.778
"I'm plottin' to liberate her
from the slacker."

00:56:02.778 --> 00:56:07.787
You casually handed her
recordings of your latest songs.

00:56:07.787 --> 00:56:13.786
Sighting the odd article on adultery,
you don the surgical gloves,

00:56:13.786 --> 00:56:17.135
clip it out, and mail it anonymously
to her.

00:56:17.135 --> 00:56:21.194
You concur.
You inquire after his well-being,

00:56:21.194 --> 00:56:26.490
as she stuffed used CDs in a bag,
and received your cash.

00:56:26.490 --> 00:56:32.538
One day, you grazed her palm with
your guitarists' lengthy fingernails.

00:56:32.538 --> 00:56:35.627
She pretended not to notice.

00:56:38.797 --> 00:56:42.473
Undone, as a man would
undo an oyster.

00:56:42.953 --> 00:56:47.404
She was the product of 
Manifest Destiny and genocide.

00:56:47.404 --> 00:56:49.866
The rape of the New World
by the Old.

00:56:49.866 --> 00:56:53.530
Immune to the fallacy
of white liberal guilt,

00:56:53.530 --> 00:56:57.177
you prized her hybrid charms.

00:56:57.177 --> 00:57:00.442
The shiny, raven, 
Native American hair

00:57:00.442 --> 00:57:05.675
curled by old English blood
into a frizzy electric storm.

00:57:05.675 --> 00:57:08.074
Her alien almond eyes.

00:57:08.074 --> 00:57:13.291
The cafe-au-lait skin,
smooth as porcelain.

00:57:13.291 --> 00:57:20.585
Local theater stretched her thespian
talent in all the wrong ways.

00:57:20.585 --> 00:57:25.513
Each company trumpeted
its speakin' of truth to power

00:57:25.513 --> 00:57:29.113
all of 'em bleatin' to the
leftist choir.

00:57:29.113 --> 00:57:32.506
Cuttin' edge exposes
of Joe McCarthy.

00:57:32.506 --> 00:57:34.842
50 years too late.

00:57:34.842 --> 00:57:38.297
Investigations of
racism and homophobia

00:57:38.297 --> 00:57:41.242
as though penned by the
Soviet Central Committee

00:57:41.242 --> 00:57:46.009
for Cultural Enlightenment,
circa 1968.

00:57:46.009 --> 00:57:51.113
You venture to a staged reading
of a George Bernard Shaw trifle,

00:57:51.113 --> 00:57:57.689
a two-hander exposin' early 20th
century British attitudes toward

00:57:57.689 --> 00:58:02.649
matrimony, which the program
promised would

00:58:02.649 --> 00:58:05.465
"Blow the roof off the 
patriarchy."

00:58:05.465 --> 00:58:09.065
Fearful you'll emit 
a tell-tale snore,

00:58:09.065 --> 00:58:11.838
you dozed off anyway.

00:58:13.098 --> 00:58:17.401
You waited in the empty lobby,
its walls festooned with

00:58:17.401 --> 00:58:21.854
curlin' photos of
Robinson Jeffers and friends.

00:58:22.434 --> 00:58:25.209
Chubby Hubby was absent.

00:58:25.209 --> 00:58:30.025
She strolled from the dressin' room,
thanked ya for comin',

00:58:30.025 --> 00:58:33.681
and then, she embraced you.

00:58:34.441 --> 00:58:39.657
Months later, just to kick yourself
for having stiffened,

00:58:39.657 --> 00:58:44.019
no, not the adolescent
kind of stiffened.

00:58:44.019 --> 00:58:50.086
You tensed, panicked, you lacked
the necessary languor. Blew it.

00:58:50.086 --> 00:58:53.325
You -- you tried deciphering 
her intent.

00:58:53.325 --> 00:58:56.846
But the green silk sleeves
enveloped ya.

00:58:56.846 --> 00:59:00.441
Was this a 'theater people' greeting?

00:59:00.441 --> 00:59:04.521
A drownin' woman
graspin' for a life saver?

00:59:04.521 --> 00:59:11.183
A friendly hug? A sign?
An...invitation?

00:59:11.183 --> 00:59:15.033
Blushin', you withdrew, 
prayin' she wouldn't ask you

00:59:15.033 --> 00:59:16.730
your opinion of the piece.

00:59:16.730 --> 00:59:18.905
She asked.

00:59:18.905 --> 00:59:22.865
You abated.
"You do a great English accent!"

00:59:24.475 --> 00:59:29.867
As you walked her to her Ferrari-red
Toyota sedan with the Oregon plates,

00:59:29.867 --> 00:59:35.241
eyes downward,
you spied her sandaled feet.

00:59:35.241 --> 00:59:40.873
While most are bestial, calloused,
or grotesquely malformed,

00:59:40.873 --> 00:59:44.734
hers were something Seraphic.

00:59:44.734 --> 00:59:49.434
Her toes were neither
prehensile nor stubby.

00:59:49.434 --> 00:59:53.657
The neatly trimmed nails
boasted no lurid lacquer.

00:59:53.657 --> 00:59:58.985
It was as though a cherub had fallen 
from a Michelangelo ceilin'

00:59:58.985 --> 01:00:05.029
and was stridin' across the shade
dappled gravel, with you.

01:00:06.239 --> 01:00:10.442
Thirty seconds to her car,
half a minute.

01:00:10.442 --> 01:00:14.042
Twenty eternities.

01:00:14.042 --> 01:00:16.619
But your breath caught in your throat.

01:00:16.619 --> 01:00:20.298
As she slid the key into the 
vaginal door slot,

01:00:20.298 --> 01:00:23.551
...SLOT...

01:00:23.551 --> 01:00:25.974
she tilted her head.

01:00:25.974 --> 01:00:31.913
Tightened the corner of her mouth
in a way that hinted at a worldly cunning.

01:00:31.913 --> 01:00:36.407
A human touch she'd never permitted 
herself, while on duty at the store.

01:00:37.997 --> 01:00:40.934
You ask an elm tree for pears.

01:00:42.324 --> 01:00:46.653
Always careful to inquire about
the Chubby Hubby,

01:00:46.653 --> 01:00:51.200
you were shocked, one morning,
to hear he moved back

01:00:51.200 --> 01:00:56.547
to his parents' Las Vegas home,
after she served him with divorce papers.

01:00:57.257 --> 01:01:03.801
Had we not been alone,
you doubt her Titanic ventilatin'

01:01:03.801 --> 01:01:07.090
would've been any the less ferocious.

01:01:07.090 --> 01:01:10.121
Among the highlights? Ooh.

01:01:10.121 --> 01:01:13.801
"I sneaked pulverized sleeping pills
into his food,

01:01:13.801 --> 01:01:17.386
and he'd still force himself
on me at night."

01:01:17.386 --> 01:01:22.361
"He confessed to Photoshopping
my head on porno women,

01:01:22.361 --> 01:01:25.052
and sending them out to his friends."

01:01:25.052 --> 01:01:28.665
"He said I had cottage cheese thighs."

01:01:28.665 --> 01:01:32.524
"He wanted to watch me
make love to another man."

01:01:32.524 --> 01:01:37.215
Hm! I confess,
my eyebrows arched.

01:01:38.655 --> 01:01:41.832
"He admitted to mailing himself,
anonymously,

01:01:41.832 --> 01:01:45.113
articles about adultery
from women's magazines."

01:01:45.113 --> 01:01:48.952
"I admit, I'd been hoping he'd commit
some heinous deed so I could

01:01:48.952 --> 01:01:53.399
divorce him, but this drunken dumpling
made me wanna kill him!"

01:01:54.269 --> 01:01:58.040
He finished with:
"Every day, I contemplate suicide.

01:01:58.040 --> 01:02:01.758
If you knew why,
you'd want me dead too."

01:02:02.208 --> 01:02:07.360
He finished with the most insightful
thing anyone's ever said to me.

01:02:07.360 --> 01:02:13.074
"You want God in your life, but you 
don't wanna admit your sister's right."

01:02:13.074 --> 01:02:18.425
Through it all, with the exception of the
voyeurism-cum-cuckold confession,

01:02:18.425 --> 01:02:22.681
you maintained your disinterested 
demeanor.

01:02:22.681 --> 01:02:27.177
We are told women do not seek advice,
only an open set of ears.

01:02:27.177 --> 01:02:33.143
But information is power, 
and you felt omnipotent.

01:02:34.473 --> 01:02:37.949
You shall ride an inch 
behind the tail.

01:02:38.409 --> 01:02:40.572
Divorce affects women
in different ways.

01:02:40.572 --> 01:02:44.458
Over the ensuing weeks, as she
settled into a rented house

01:02:44.458 --> 01:02:48.829
with girlfriends, you saw her
grow more...interestin'?

01:02:49.439 --> 01:02:53.257
Her hair, once pulled into a
scalp-stretching bun,

01:02:53.257 --> 01:02:59.065
fell free and frizzy. Granny glasses
replaced with contact lenses.

01:02:59.065 --> 01:03:05.801
The, uh, matrimonial buttocks shrank,
tho she remained a tad heavy in the thigh.

01:03:05.801 --> 01:03:10.217
You imagined her entering a lesbian phase.

01:03:10.217 --> 01:03:15.914
What better way to repudiate 
the demeanin' world of testosterone?

01:03:15.914 --> 01:03:20.313
Than to anchor a while in the safe,
Sapphic harbor?

01:03:20.313 --> 01:03:26.617
But, with her pillow talk,
comparin' male outrages,

01:03:26.617 --> 01:03:29.833
an investigator turns outward again.

01:03:29.833 --> 01:03:33.955
Seeking a man.
This man.

01:03:33.955 --> 01:03:40.856
The day she sold you the hard to find
"David Bowie BBC Radio Theater London,

01:03:40.856 --> 01:03:43.864
June 17th 2000," oh-ho!

01:03:43.864 --> 01:03:49.193
And, you noted the contact lenses
and the come-hither eyeliner.

01:03:49.193 --> 01:03:52.762
Was the day you slapped a
Global Positioning Device

01:03:52.762 --> 01:03:55.807
in her Toyota's chassis.

01:03:56.217 --> 01:04:03.006
You confessed a rapist's shiver
as you violated her car's backside.

01:04:04.316 --> 01:04:07.882
My Bastilion has been struck
by lightning.

01:04:08.622 --> 01:04:14.392
One Sunday mornin', you detect
her Toyota headin' east

01:04:14.392 --> 01:04:17.049
on Carmel Valley Road.

01:04:17.049 --> 01:04:20.680
Though Sundays are usually reserved
for leadin' your grandson's

01:04:20.680 --> 01:04:23.865
Sunday School class, ya beg off,

01:04:23.865 --> 01:04:28.329
and end up in a trailhead
above the Arroyo Seco River.

01:04:28.329 --> 01:04:33.354
Ya park your blue Jeep
alongside the Ferrari-red sedan,

01:04:33.354 --> 01:04:39.337
grab your military binoculars,
and like Daniel Day-Lewis' Hawkeye,

01:04:39.337 --> 01:04:46.617
ya follow a gaggle of Nike footprints
into the Vantana wilderness.

01:04:46.617 --> 01:04:51.881
Your prints are fresh in the settled dust,
and appear to belong to 4 females.

01:04:51.881 --> 01:04:57.368
You press onward, pausin' when 
two birdwatchers, sightin'

01:04:57.368 --> 01:05:02.282
your binoculars danglin' by their cord
around your neck, arrest our progress

01:05:02.282 --> 01:05:06.872
bleatin' about a red-winged blackbird
they saw around the next bend.

01:05:06.872 --> 01:05:13.272
You up the ante, with a bogus report
of a ginormous condor

01:05:13.272 --> 01:05:16.153
perched in a skeletal tree.

01:05:16.153 --> 01:05:21.656
They hurry on, and you advance
toward your destiny.

01:05:22.536 --> 01:05:26.858
Hearin' rushin' water in the distance,
you attune your hearin'

01:05:26.858 --> 01:05:33.316
to the frequency used by giddy girls,
as they frolic in emerald pools.

01:05:35.496 --> 01:05:41.544
Ya leave the trail, and clamber upward,
through the still, dewy chaparral.

01:05:41.544 --> 01:05:48.888
The sweet ambiance of a bay laurel grove
camouflages ya, as you emerge

01:05:48.888 --> 01:05:51.096
over the north-facin' ridge.

01:05:51.096 --> 01:05:55.517
There! There...they...are!

01:05:55.517 --> 01:05:58.382
Four sirens.

01:05:58.382 --> 01:06:02.056
Divin' and twistin' like
otters in Eden.

01:06:02.056 --> 01:06:05.464
River maidens
out of Wagner.

01:06:05.464 --> 01:06:08.648
One of 'em, 
not your long-sought goddess,

01:06:08.648 --> 01:06:11.192
brazenly topless.

01:06:11.192 --> 01:06:15.912
She's darin' the others
beyond the au naturel frontier.

01:06:15.912 --> 01:06:22.278
First, one. Then, another.
Then...another.

01:06:22.278 --> 01:06:26.216
Bare their 30-somethin' breasts.

01:06:26.216 --> 01:06:30.190
With you seekin' the lone holdout.

01:06:30.190 --> 01:06:35.464
You withdraw the befogged lenses
from your perspirin' face,

01:06:35.464 --> 01:06:40.301
and whisper a prayer
to the Lord of the Underworld.

01:06:42.811 --> 01:06:46.103
Prayer answered.

01:06:47.373 --> 01:06:49.455
She relents.

01:06:49.455 --> 01:06:55.064
You visually caress
the ivory white, pink-tipped buds.

01:06:55.064 --> 01:06:58.510
And decide --
Is it really a decision,

01:06:58.510 --> 01:07:02.312
or some genetically-determined urge?

01:07:02.312 --> 01:07:07.833
Well, at any rate, you crawl on your belly
from boulder to boulder,

01:07:07.833 --> 01:07:11.945
glancin' water-ward when you can.

01:07:11.945 --> 01:07:18.907
Now, the naughty group leader
has shed her bikini bottom.

01:07:18.907 --> 01:07:25.372
Up ahead, you spy a perfect perch,
not 50 yards as the condor flies,

01:07:25.372 --> 01:07:27.224
above the pool.

01:07:27.224 --> 01:07:33.354
Slitherin' through the [?],
you reach over, down a branch,

01:07:33.354 --> 01:07:36.472
and feel a sting in your wrist,

01:07:36.472 --> 01:07:42.872
just as the tell-tale rattle
spits its warning.

01:07:43.592 --> 01:07:49.836
Your right arm goes numb, as my venom
speeds toward your dark heart.

01:07:50.456 --> 01:07:54.200
You wanna cry out to the now
nude quartet, but

01:07:54.200 --> 01:07:59.032
the split-second of shame
earns your silence.

01:07:59.032 --> 01:08:03.026
The sky spins.
As it goes black,

01:08:03.026 --> 01:08:08.652
you feel the earth split open,
as you tumble downward.

01:08:12.222 --> 01:08:14.680
Enjoy your stay.

01:08:14.680 --> 01:08:21.468
We've, uh, supplied a never-ending
soundtrack.

01:08:23.288 --> 01:08:29.831
[Pensive piano.]

01:08:29.831 --> 01:08:37.213
[Sings] Let me look at you,
before the lines appear.

01:08:37.213 --> 01:08:44.648
Let me look at you,
in the slanting light.

01:08:44.648 --> 01:08:53.592
Let me look at you,
as day slides into night.

01:08:53.592 --> 01:08:57.976
Into night.

01:08:57.976 --> 01:09:02.984
I just want to look at you.
Oh, please.

01:09:02.984 --> 01:09:09.583
Let me look at you.
See what my eyes discover

01:09:09.583 --> 01:09:13.751
'til you go back to your lover.

01:09:13.751 --> 01:09:17.832
[Violins]

01:09:17.832 --> 01:09:20.645
Let me look at you.

01:09:20.645 --> 01:09:22.815
[Violin, piano]

01:09:22.815 --> 01:09:26.691
Let me look at you
while the hours disappear.

01:09:26.691 --> 01:09:29.381
[Violin]

01:09:29.381 --> 01:09:34.189
Let me look at you
in another man's home.

01:09:34.189 --> 01:09:37.109
[Violin]

01:09:37.109 --> 01:09:41.493
Let me look at you
until it's time to go.

01:09:41.493 --> 01:09:44.233
[Piano]

01:09:44.233 --> 01:09:47.204
Until it's time to go.

01:09:47.204 --> 01:09:49.974
[Minimal piano; violin]

01:09:49.974 --> 01:09:54.711
I just want to look at you.
Oh, please.

01:09:54.711 --> 01:10:01.800
Let me look at you.
See what my eyes discover

01:10:01.800 --> 01:10:05.565
'til you go back to your lover.

01:10:05.565 --> 01:10:09.592
[Violin, piano]

01:10:09.592 --> 01:10:12.536
Let me look at you.

01:10:12.536 --> 01:10:14.516
[Minimal music]

01:10:14.516 --> 01:10:20.345
Though I know you do not want me
any more,

01:10:20.345 --> 01:10:22.355
[Violin]

01:10:22.355 --> 01:10:26.980
when I look at you, my spirit soars.

01:10:26.980 --> 01:10:28.860
[Violin, minimal piano]

01:10:28.860 --> 01:10:33.446
Let me look at you,
and thrill me to the core.

01:10:33.451 --> 01:10:35.581
[Soft music]

01:10:35.581 --> 01:10:41.165
Let me look at you,
and see your hard stuff.

01:10:41.165 --> 01:10:43.605
[Music]

01:10:43.605 --> 01:10:49.366
Let me look at you
until I get enough.

01:10:49.366 --> 01:10:51.686
[Violins]

01:10:51.686 --> 01:10:54.710
Until I get enough.

01:10:54.710 --> 01:10:56.860
[Violin]

01:10:56.860 --> 01:11:04.903
I will worship your beautiful
suntanned feet

01:11:04.903 --> 01:11:10.602
cradled by your summer leather sandals.

01:11:10.602 --> 01:11:12.192
[Piano, soft violin]

01:11:12.192 --> 01:11:16.642
Let me look into your alien almond eyes.

01:11:16.642 --> 01:11:18.812
[Music]

01:11:18.812 --> 01:11:23.746
Let me look at you by this glowing candle.

01:11:23.746 --> 01:11:25.776
[Soft violins]

01:11:25.776 --> 01:11:31.131
Let me look at you like a seagoing vandal.

01:11:31.131 --> 01:11:33.751
[Violin]

01:11:33.751 --> 01:11:37.017
To hell with scandal.

01:11:37.017 --> 01:11:39.367
[Violins]

01:11:39.367 --> 01:11:46.552
I just want to look at you.
Oh please, let me look at you.

01:11:46.552 --> 01:11:55.455
See what my eyes discover,
'til you go back to your lover.

01:11:55.455 --> 01:11:58.535
[Violin, piano]

01:11:58.535 --> 01:12:09.207
Let me look at you.
Let me look at you.

01:12:09.207 --> 01:12:14.888
Oh-ohhh-ohhhhh.

01:12:14.888 --> 01:12:30.769
[Sad violin]

01:12:30.769 --> 01:12:35.383
[Applause]

01:12:35.383 --> 01:12:37.854
Thanks for coming.
Let's meet our cast.

01:12:37.854 --> 01:12:39.072
[Applause]

01:12:39.072 --> 01:12:40.812
Ron Genauer as
the woebegone umpire.

01:12:40.812 --> 01:12:43.902
[Applause]

01:12:43.902 --> 01:12:45.532
The sheep and wolf
from "Hunger."

01:12:45.532 --> 01:12:48.922
Mindy Whitfield.
Jason Roeder.

01:12:48.922 --> 01:12:50.592
[Applause]

01:12:50.592 --> 01:12:53.852
"The Accuser."
Jeffrey Heyer.

01:12:53.852 --> 01:12:55.432
[Applause]

01:12:55.432 --> 01:12:59.623
And all the way from Greenfield
California, Christopher Lopez.

01:12:59.623 --> 01:13:12.760
[Applause]

01:13:12.760 --> 01:13:22.611
[Audience chatter]

01:13:22.611 --> 01:13:25.657
Fabulous cast. Wow.

01:13:25.657 --> 01:13:28.357
[Audience chatter]

01:13:29.367 --> 01:13:31.467
"Fabulous cast. Wow."

01:13:31.467 --> 01:13:38.517
[Acoustic guitar]

01:13:38.517 --> 01:13:42.217
You crawled across
dried thorns,

01:13:42.217 --> 01:13:44.232
and chewed cut glass.

01:13:44.232 --> 01:13:47.052
[Guitar]

01:13:47.052 --> 01:13:49.677
Please,
come through my door

01:13:49.677 --> 01:13:50.547
[Guitar]

01:13:50.547 --> 01:13:52.717
lay down on the grass.

01:13:52.717 --> 01:13:55.027
[Guitar]

01:13:55.027 --> 01:13:57.932
I don't care
where you've been

01:13:57.932 --> 01:14:00.022
[Guitar]

01:14:00.022 --> 01:14:02.777
in the dark side of town.

01:14:02.777 --> 01:14:05.377
[Guitar]

01:14:05.377 --> 01:14:08.577
Your history
might be shameful.

01:14:08.577 --> 01:14:11.335
[Guitar]

01:14:11.335 --> 01:14:13.725
I will always let you in.

01:14:13.725 --> 01:14:15.775
[Guitar]

01:14:15.775 --> 01:14:19.055
I will never let you down.

01:14:19.055 --> 01:14:23.170
[Guitar]

01:14:23.170 --> 01:14:27.080
I'm entertaining angels.

01:14:27.080 --> 01:14:36.095
[Guitar]

01:14:36.095 --> 01:14:38.935
Now you're down on your luck,

01:14:38.935 --> 01:14:40.145
[Guitar]

01:14:40.145 --> 01:14:41.725
your spirits broke.

01:14:41.725 --> 01:14:44.805
[Guitar]

01:14:44.805 --> 01:14:49.385
I see your beggar's cup
filled with busted hope.

01:14:49.385 --> 01:14:52.595
[Guitar]

01:14:52.595 --> 01:14:55.695
Let this new day begin

01:14:55.695 --> 01:14:57.537
[Guitar]

01:14:57.537 --> 01:15:00.047
before the sun goes down.

01:15:00.047 --> 01:15:01.507
[Guitar]

01:15:01.507 --> 01:15:04.407
I'll know I served an angel.

01:15:04.407 --> 01:15:06.877
[Guitar]

01:15:06.877 --> 01:15:09.377
I will always let you in.

01:15:09.377 --> 01:15:11.577
[Guitar]

01:15:11.577 --> 01:15:15.187
I will never let you down.

01:15:15.187 --> 01:15:18.807
[Guitar]

01:15:18.807 --> 01:15:22.217
I'm entertaining angels.

01:15:22.217 --> 01:15:30.357
[Guitar]

01:15:30.357 --> 01:15:33.227
Hello stranger, 
drop your things.

01:15:33.227 --> 01:15:34.967
[Guitar]

01:15:34.967 --> 01:15:36.257
Come on in.

01:15:36.257 --> 01:15:38.577
[Guitar]

01:15:38.577 --> 01:15:40.247
There's no danger.

01:15:40.247 --> 01:15:42.287
[Guitar]

01:15:42.287 --> 01:15:45.897
I see the wings
beneath your skin.

01:15:45.897 --> 01:15:52.737
[Guitar]

01:15:52.737 --> 01:15:55.437
I am no holy man.

01:15:55.437 --> 01:15:58.717
[Guitar]

01:15:58.717 --> 01:16:00.117
just a human

01:16:00.117 --> 01:16:02.707
[Guitar]

01:16:02.707 --> 01:16:04.767
who must obey the plan

01:16:04.767 --> 01:16:06.747
[Guitar]

01:16:06.747 --> 01:16:08.157
for a communion.

01:16:08.157 --> 01:16:10.287
[Guitar]

01:16:10.287 --> 01:16:12.957
It's a mortal sin

01:16:12.957 --> 01:16:14.157
[Guitar]

01:16:14.157 --> 01:16:17.607
if I would renounce a man

01:16:17.607 --> 01:16:19.547
[Guitar]

01:16:19.547 --> 01:16:22.327
whose life is painful.

01:16:22.327 --> 01:16:24.677
[Guitar]

01:16:24.677 --> 01:16:27.547
I will always let you in.

01:16:27.547 --> 01:16:29.457
[Guitar]

01:16:29.457 --> 01:16:32.947
I will never let you down.

01:16:32.947 --> 01:16:34.917
[Guitar]

01:16:34.917 --> 01:16:37.145
[Guitar chord]

01:16:37.145 --> 01:16:42.184
I'm entertaining angels.

01:16:42.184 --> 01:16:50.554
[Guitar flourish, chord, fade.]

01:16:58.972 --> 01:17:01.175
Does anyone here watch
"Game of Thrones?"

01:17:01.175 --> 01:17:03.190
You do?
OK.

01:17:03.190 --> 01:17:09.347
I wish you guys could just 
donate that to that sculpture garden.

01:17:09.347 --> 01:17:11.901
You watch "Game of Thrones?"
- Uh, some of it.

01:17:11.901 --> 01:17:15.601
I was gonna make a speech.
- OK.

01:17:16.311 --> 01:17:19.752
Hold on. I'll wait until he has the axe.

01:17:19.752 --> 01:17:22.534
In the name of King Aeres of 
the House Targaryen,

01:17:22.534 --> 01:17:26.547
second of his name, Lord of the
Seven Kingdoms and Protector

01:17:26.547 --> 01:17:30.557
of the Realm,
we sentence this rock to die.

01:17:32.567 --> 01:17:34.423
Watch out if this comes flying off.

01:17:34.423 --> 01:17:39.286
Yahhhhh!
[Papier mache crunching]

01:17:39.286 --> 01:17:41.671
I'll do the first two.

01:17:41.671 --> 01:17:43.334
Yahhhhh!

01:17:43.334 --> 01:17:44.684
[Thudding]

01:17:45.334 --> 01:17:47.359
Who wants it next?
Excalibur!

01:17:47.359 --> 01:17:48.359
[Laughter]

01:17:48.359 --> 01:17:50.199
Liberating the spirit within.

01:17:50.199 --> 01:17:54.699
[Thuds]

01:17:54.699 --> 01:17:55.959
Ohhhh.

01:17:57.849 --> 01:18:00.614
[Laughter]

01:18:01.634 --> 01:18:04.135
The boulder wins!

01:18:04.135 --> 01:18:07.495
Cody Moore built a magnificent
piece of art.

01:18:07.975 --> 01:18:10.135
Sir Jason of Roederiana.

01:18:10.135 --> 01:18:16.520
[Thumping]

01:18:16.520 --> 01:18:18.223
We know how to make rocks.

01:18:18.223 --> 01:18:20.407
There's a body inside!

01:18:20.407 --> 01:18:22.006
The Post Weekly, he used.

01:18:22.006 --> 01:18:23.016
[Thumps]

01:18:23.016 --> 01:18:24.247
Haha!

01:18:24.247 --> 01:18:28.470
[Thumping]
- There you go.

01:18:28.470 --> 01:18:30.134
You carry this around with you,
all the time?

01:18:30.134 --> 01:18:32.016
ALL the time.

01:18:33.056 --> 01:18:38.167
This stuff will fix
so many things.

01:18:38.167 --> 01:18:43.350
It's easy to carry.
Doesn't spoil.

01:18:43.350 --> 01:18:50.087
[Axe thudding]

01:18:50.087 --> 01:18:53.741
Hey. We need a cleanup hitter
on my baseball team.

01:18:53.741 --> 01:18:55.031
[Scattered laughter]

01:18:56.421 --> 01:18:58.548
- There ya go.
- Ooh.

01:18:58.548 --> 01:19:24.468
[Axe thumping]

01:19:24.468 --> 01:19:25.951
Anybody else want in?

01:19:25.951 --> 01:19:26.894
[Laughter]

01:19:26.894 --> 01:19:28.194
[Thuds continue]

01:19:28.194 --> 01:19:29.324
[Laughter]

01:19:29.324 --> 01:19:30.822
- I can't do that much damage.

01:19:30.822 --> 01:19:32.374
- Reinaldo?

01:19:32.374 --> 01:19:33.876
- Run, run, Jason.

01:19:33.876 --> 01:19:35.870
- It was your show.
You get the last word.

01:19:35.870 --> 01:19:36.870
[Sharp thuds]

01:19:36.870 --> 01:19:38.998
This is to all the critics.

01:19:38.998 --> 01:19:42.475
[Laughter]
[Thumping]